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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

PIL has sent be a bill for a broken wine glass

999 replies

pugreverywhere · 03/05/2018 14:55

Yes, had to namechange.

Went to PIL' home last weekend, had a glass of wine and I accidentally dropped it. No big deal, they shrugged it off. I get on well with both FIL and MIL, have been with DH for 4 years now and we are having our first child in 4 months.

They're well off.. as in, VERY well off.. DP and I on the other hand live in a rented 3 bed semi-dettached property so definitely not as well off.

I didn't know at the time, but said wine glass apparently happens to be pretty high end. FIL has this morning sent me an e-mail saying that I can just transfer the £156 to him or buy the glass online. He even attached a link and included their address, should I not know it by now(!).

At first I thought it was a joke only to realise that these people have no sense of humor, so they obviously must be expect me to pay them ASAP. Haven't told DH yet. Really shocked at this as they are not known for being stingy.

AIBU not to pay this? I am tempted to buy a £20 glass off Amazon!

OP posts:
BarbarianMum · 03/05/2018 15:15

Shock Some people are so rude.

I'd caution against the idea of mentioning home insurance in case he decides to charge you the excess (I like the idea of sending a plastic glass though). Tell your dp to be careful about paying, you don't want to set that as a precident.

NoCanoe · 03/05/2018 15:15

If you choose to serve drinks in very expensive glasses, you take the hit if they get chipped or broken. Its been your choice to serve them.

You do not embarrass your guest by requesting compensation. That is excruciatingly bad manners.

It needs to be passed over to DH for discussion. Itll be interesting to hear his intake of it.

1Strawberry · 03/05/2018 15:16

‘If I broke an expensive item I’d offer to replace it....’

Yes maybe if it was something like a vase I’d knocked into, but not a glass I’d been given to use - glasses break, that’s a normal part of life, don’t give someone an expensive one to use if you’re that precious about it!

AdoraBell · 03/05/2018 15:16

Personally I would transfer the money from the joint account and inform then that you, and the future grandchildren, will not be visiting their home again to avoid accidents, but they are welcome to visit you and the GC. But not the next couple of months please, as having that much gone from the budget means you can’t feed visitors, soz. Much love etc.

pigmcpigface · 03/05/2018 15:17

Adora - HA! Nicely played!

Awwlookatmybabyspider · 03/05/2018 15:17

£156 for a glass. Your FIL and Mil aren't The Queen and Prince Philip by any chance are they.
I'd be sending 10 for a pound from Home and Bargain.

HollowTalk · 03/05/2018 15:18

OP, this will be picked up by the DM, you know. Your ILs seem the sort to read that rag, so if you want to keep your relationship with them, delete this thread.

KurriKurri · 03/05/2018 15:18

I would reply 'wow - fancy being silly enough to use such expensive glasses when they are so easily broken. Better make sure I never let the baby visit after it's born or we'll be getting all sorts of bills ! Love pugreverywhere. P.s. I'm not paying for the glass, claim on your insurance.

yolofish · 03/05/2018 15:18

I would be my life that MIL doesnt know FIL has done this...

LoisWilkersonsLastNerve · 03/05/2018 15:19

Fuck you Daily Mail and all who sail on yee!
You're all arseholes as are your readers.

Gunpowder · 03/05/2018 15:19

Grin @ adora’s plan. Think it’s a serious point too though, what’s going to happen when you have toddlers?!

pigmcpigface · 03/05/2018 15:20

Hollow - or leave it be, and let them find out that way. They deserve it!

vitara · 03/05/2018 15:20

Surely the adult thing to do is offer and pay for something you broke.

Grow up OP

Awwlookatmybabyspider · 03/05/2018 15:21

They also can't think much of their unborn CG. I'd they're willing to take 156 from you.
I agree about being very cautious about sending him/her there. You'll end having to declare yourself bankrupt as babies do break things.

Ryder63 · 03/05/2018 15:21

You do not embarrass your guest by requesting compensation. That is excruciatingly bad manners

Quite. A complete lack of manners or class.

SneakyGremlins · 03/05/2018 15:21

My glasses were four for £5 in Sainsbury's Confused

KnightofWands · 03/05/2018 15:21

Absolute madness. Would show the note to your DH but ignore the suggestion you replace the glass. This was an accident! I might be pissed off if somebody broke something in my house accidently but wouldn't make a big deal of it and certainly wouldn't ask for them replace it in these circumstances. They really should not have been using such expensive glasses if they expected accidental damage to be replaced. Moreover, if they have home contents insurance then this might cover the replacement - if they need to replace at all.

BevBrook · 03/05/2018 15:22

something like a glass most people wouldn't expect them to be that expensive and if they were they should be warned and given the option not to risk using it

I don't know, that's a bit rude isn't it, "oh by the way this glass cost £X, so please be careful!"? We have some expensive glasses (not that much though, about half that, maybe a quarter, I can't remember if the price was for a pair!) that were wedding presents and if we have guests using them and my lovely dad is there he will solemnly warn people how expensive they were, and I do cringe a little inside! I just don't use them if there are children running about and hope that grownups won't break them - I would never ask someone to pay for the breakage!

Awwlookatmybabyspider · 03/05/2018 15:23

Why has the DM nabbed this thread

adjsavedmylife · 03/05/2018 15:23

Take your own plastic beaker every time you go round there from now on Grin

FadedRed · 03/05/2018 15:26

Let's hope it was just an very unfunny joke, Op.
Even as a pa dig as your 'clumsiness', it's very unpleasant thong to do.

PinkHeart when I clicked your Waterford glass link, I thought, "Ooh, they look familiar?" Turns out the three glasses on my dresser (they were my late DM's wedding present back in the fifties) are those very glasses! I will take more care washing them in future! Shock

ikeepaforkinmypurse · 03/05/2018 15:27

To be fair, if you add spilled your glass on a rug, you would offer to get it cleaned or replaced wouldn't you?
It doesn't matter if you believe something is too expensive, you pay for your own damage.

When it's your own family, it's a very weird attitude. I would pay - no choice - but I wouldn't go back there again.

DairyisClosed · 03/05/2018 15:27

Maybe buy him a copy of debretts instead.

TheRealMcKenna · 03/05/2018 15:28

They're well off.. as in, VERY well off.. DP and I on the other hand live in a rented 3 bed semi-dettached property so definitely not as well off.

That has nothing to do with this situation. My PIL are stinking rich, but I would never dream of asking them for money for an accidentally broken wine glass - whatever its value. If it’s that valuable, claim on insurance. If it has that much sentimental value, don’t let guests drink out of it.

I can’t believe how rude some people are!

FadedRed · 03/05/2018 15:28

*thong = thing. Bloody auto correct - the very last thing you want from your PIL's would be a thong! Blush