Is this groom a CF?

[SaveBandit]

I usually love a good CF thread and ones mixed in with weddings are always great. But now that it's happening to us I'm not sure what to do!

We went to a wedding at the weekend for one of DH's colleagues. They had an amazon gift list so DH ordered something from there. It came in quite a big box and the shape of the actual gift meant that we had to wrap the box with the gift inside.

When we arrived we noticed that nobody else had presents, thought nothing of it but people kept commenting and saying "We just got them vouchers/money." We asked DH's colleague, the groom, where to put it and he was quite surprised and said "We weren't expecting gifts. Thank you, can you put it by the post box for cards?"

So we did, forgot all about it and enjoyed the day and night. Towards the end of the night we stood near the post box and I pointed out that ours was still the only present. DH laughed it off and said "Looks like we're the only ones who saw the gift list!" Left a short while after and thought nothing more about the gift.

DH got a message last night from groom saying "Thanks for coming on Saturday and for the gift. We had a bit of a last minute change and decided to ask for money towards the honeymoon instead of what we'd put on the gift list. Can we arrange to send it back and just get the money for it instead? I can pass it back next week when I'm back in work. Really appreciate the thought but definitely think we need a holiday after the stress of wedding planning."

The gift cost £70. DH didn't reply but showed it to me. I was just shocked at how cheeky it was. I'm leaving it up to him to sort because I have only met the couple a handful of times. I do just feel a bit stupid turning up with this huge box when everyone else seemed to be told to give money/vouchers. Dh said this was the first he'd heard of giving money and he has no problem giving money but feels asking if we can return it and give him money instead is a bit out of order.

Should we just return it and leave it at that or does anyone have any choice words or phrases we can reply with?!

[PumpernickleInaWarehouse]

How ungrateful and rude!
Is he normally cheeky in general or has the wedding sent him nutty

[SaveBandit]

So DH went out last night with work and Groomzillo turned up later on. He asked DH if he could have a word after about half an hour so they went outside to talk. Apparently someone from work sent him a message to warn him that DH has told everyone how cheeky he was and that he was going to return the gift himself and not give Groomzillo a penny. DH told him that hadn't happened and that all he had done was assured the pregnant woman who was worried that she hadn't got anything from the gift list that Groomzillo would actually want money as he had text DH to say this. The woman obviously told other people but DH said he didn't go around shouting or calling him anything.

But then DH said that he did actually think it was cheeky and that he was annoyed that we hadn't been told before the wedding they were asking for money. Groomzillo said that he had text people to ask if they'd purchased anything from the list yet and then when most people replied saying no he asked them for money to save them hassle. DH said he hadn't received any text so groomzillo said he must have missed him by mistake. He asked DH if he was annoyed and DH told him he was but he just wanted to forget about it and get the gift returned. Groomzillo then said that if it was easier he could just sell it on eBay and DH said he wanted to go through amazon and get the money back so he could give some as a gift and use the rest to put towards a holiday that we really needed asked groomzillo to let him know when he had sent it off.

DH then went back inside and carried on with his evening. Someone asked him what had happened and he just said we were just sorting out when Groomzillo was going to send back the gift I bought him so that I can make sure he gets money from us instead.

[FinallyHere]

DH said he wanted to go through amazon and get the money back so he could give some as a gift and use the rest to put towards a holiday that we really needed asked groomzillo to let him know when he had sent it off

Hats off to DH, that sounds like a really good way to handle it, I am impressed and a little bit 😍 with your DH. Enjoy your holiday.

[Mrsknackered]

Well done DH. CF! I bet you need a holiday after all the wedding present planning.

[Chocolatecoffeeaddict]

I would return the gift and keep the £70. You're under no obligation to give them anything. And they don't deserve it as they are beyond cheeky.

[SteveMcGarrettsBudgieSmugglers]

I just cant believe that anyone would be that rude, its just not something you would do. good on your DH for telling him that he was cheeky, cf like groomzillo will thin they are justified though

[TomRavenscroft]

Good one, DH!

[KeepServingTheDrinks]

very assertive and clear DH you've got there, OP. I'm impressed.

[expatinscotland]

Really hope he doesn't give him the £70.

[cushioncovers]

What a CF that's rude of him he should of just kept the present and said nothing. I would send it back but be very 'laid back' about giving him money in a card. Maybe so laid back that he has already returned from his holiday.

And £70 wow that's very generous.

[Totoro3]

I would do exactly the same.. it conveys a message without having to say anything, hopefully anyway. I can't abide bad manners.. no excuse for it at all.

[SayCoolNowSayWhip]

What a palaver though! If I was Groomzillo I would be totes embarrassed. Although I wouldn't be churlish enough to send a message asking for money so...

What's the betting he never texted anyone prior to the wedding?? It's such a fob off excuse "Oh, I must have missed you off the text list" especially if DH is a good enough friend / colleague to spend £70 on a present.

[SayCoolNowSayWhip]

I can't believe I just wrote "totes". Now I'm embarrassed...

[QuoadUltra]

Gobsmacked. Sell on EBay?! WTF?!

Get the gift back. Return it if you can.

But, frankly, the whole thing has gone a bit weird and unpleasant now.

[blessedbe]

Following for the reaction when CFG actually receives less than the value of the gift...

[SaveBandit]

The gift has been returned and DH has given Groomzillo £20. He put it in an envelope and wrote "Enjoy your honeymoon" on it.

As of yet nothing from him to say thank you or where's the rest of it. I'll update if anything else happens!

[TomRavenscroft]

The gift has been returned Good!
DH has given Groomzillo £20 Less good. The man didn't deserve a penny.

Still, glad it's resolved.

[StrangeLookingParasite]

Someone asked him what had happened and he just said we were just sorting out when Groomzillo was going to send back the gift I bought him so that I can make sure he gets money from us instead

[SaveBandit]

Another update!

We received a thank you card from Mr and Mrs Groomzillo thanking us for coming to the wedding and for our generosity. It was a printed card with a couple of photos that was clearly sent to everyone. There was also another note enclosed saying "Just wanted to say thanks again for being so understanding about the mix up with gifts. We really appreciate the effort that went in to finding a gift but sure you can see why we'd prefer money!"

So it was a misunderstanding, he wasn't being a cheeky fucker or groomzillo after all

[Anasnake]

I'd tape a pound coin to the inside of a card and leave it at that

[buckeejit]

Unreal! At least you're better off at the end of it, albeit out of plenty of time & hassle. Just awful

[CSIblonde]

He has incredibly bad manners. If you dont want or like a gift you say thank you then donate to a charity or, give to a friend/relative who does like it. Ignore his request.

[arranfan]

By any chance did you order it far enough in advance that next week it will have passed its 'Return by' date?