Is this groom a CF?

[SaveBandit]

I usually love a good CF thread and ones mixed in with weddings are always great. But now that it's happening to us I'm not sure what to do!

We went to a wedding at the weekend for one of DH's colleagues. They had an amazon gift list so DH ordered something from there. It came in quite a big box and the shape of the actual gift meant that we had to wrap the box with the gift inside.

When we arrived we noticed that nobody else had presents, thought nothing of it but people kept commenting and saying "We just got them vouchers/money." We asked DH's colleague, the groom, where to put it and he was quite surprised and said "We weren't expecting gifts. Thank you, can you put it by the post box for cards?"

So we did, forgot all about it and enjoyed the day and night. Towards the end of the night we stood near the post box and I pointed out that ours was still the only present. DH laughed it off and said "Looks like we're the only ones who saw the gift list!" Left a short while after and thought nothing more about the gift.

DH got a message last night from groom saying "Thanks for coming on Saturday and for the gift. We had a bit of a last minute change and decided to ask for money towards the honeymoon instead of what we'd put on the gift list. Can we arrange to send it back and just get the money for it instead? I can pass it back next week when I'm back in work. Really appreciate the thought but definitely think we need a holiday after the stress of wedding planning."

The gift cost £70. DH didn't reply but showed it to me. I was just shocked at how cheeky it was. I'm leaving it up to him to sort because I have only met the couple a handful of times. I do just feel a bit stupid turning up with this huge box when everyone else seemed to be told to give money/vouchers. Dh said this was the first he'd heard of giving money and he has no problem giving money but feels asking if we can return it and give him money instead is a bit out of order.

Should we just return it and leave it at that or does anyone have any choice words or phrases we can reply with?!

How rude!!! I think I would say o.k no worries will return the gift and give them sweet F.A to teach them a lesson! You were extremely generous to spend £70 on a gift for a couple that you hardly know and instead of seeing that they have basically thrown it back in your faces!! X

Return the gift and put £25 in an envelope and go out for a nice meal with you dh with the remaining money

DH is a wise man, great update !

OP how did everyone else know they'd changed their minds about receiving gifts? When I see a gift list I tend to buy quite early on so I can get something nice for the money I want to spend rather than being left with the dregs and trying to make it add up!! There wouldn't be a hope of me being able to return anything! I am glad your DH isn't giving him the full value back though

Hope it's still in all original packaging with any labels in pkrace, instructions etc or you could have problems returning.
Maybe that could be your 'get out of jail free' card.

I’m sorry he doesn’t like his gift but why should you have the hassle of returning it! Say you will return it when you have the time but it might be quicker if he sells it on himself and then don’t bother with them any more. I think that’s a really generous gift and I had mixed gifts and money for my wedding and was very appreciative of both!

What a cheek! So rude

Reminds me of the scene in Nighty Night when Cathy buys Jill a necklace and she hates it and asks for the equivalent in cash...or it just gets nasty!

It's not difficult to return things to Amazon for a refund, and if it was me I would just do it.
Maybe they have overstretched themselves with their wedding and honeymoon and actually need the money.
Presumably you had a day and evening out with food provided.

I agree with others who say return the gift and give the couple £20 and you keep the rest. Like you said yourself, you have only met the couple a handful of times, use the £50 you get back to go for drinks with your other half and laugh at the couple who would be so blatant at asking you to return a wedding gift for money!!

Good on your dh. I dont think they deserve anything.

£70 on a wedding gift for a colleague...

I think I would be mortified if I had this message? Surely they will go on honeymoon if they have the money instead of the gift anyway?

Well done your DH.

No no no! Tough luck to him. X

I'd return it, put the £70 towards a break/prezzie/treat for myself/my family, then send the CF a postcard saying "hope your honeymoon wasn't as stressful as wedding [and gift-list] planning!"

Wedding website???? Is that a thing?? We had a list and most people bought from it but if they didn't (and some did not) then I would never have returned the gift. We did get some awful candlesticks but it's the thought that counts and they are still in the loft. 16 years ago now. 😀

And yes, he is a CF. So, so rude. Presents should be accepted with good grace and manners.

'It's not difficult to return things to Amazon for a refund, and if it was me I would just do it.
Maybe they have overstretched themselves with their wedding and honeymoon and actually need the money.
Presumably you had a day and evening out with food provided.'

Why not sell tickets to weddings if you're going to go down the route of people paying for the expense of their hosting? It's their problem if they overstretched themselves throwing a party and they are having this mini-moon plus another holiday. £25 is plenty for a twat with no manners who tells a guest to take a gift back and hand him the money for it. I'd have given him FA.

I would be giving him the money in copper coins in an envelope - but that's just me. I enjoy being a petty fucker 😂

Amazon returns are okay- but you'll have to pay the return postage as that's not covered unless an item is faulty. If it's not or heavy it could be expensive to send.
It's not just the cost it's the HASSLE of it all.

Dh has decided to organise for him to return it and then give him £25 back.

Yay to Groomzillo returning it but NAY to giving him £25!

Dh has decided to organise for him to return it and then give him £25 back.

That's good, but I still vote for the donkey sanctuary.

I'd give him the middle finger never mind £25.00.

No qualms about asking for money instead of gifts for a wedding, but asking to return a gift for cash isn't done. I'm not into this telling people you don't like the gift, it's rude and ungrateful. The best presents I receive for birthdays etc are ones that cost next to nothing, but show the giver knows me and has thought about the choice. My cousin is there best gift giver, so much thought in everything :)

I'd just return the item and keep the cash, and laugh in his face if he ever dares to ask for the money 😜