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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

In a Controlling Relationship with DCat

127 replies

AnaViaSalamanca · 27/04/2018 14:35

Not really AIBU but need to vent.

He is micromanaging and controlling me all the time, but today I am working from home and finding it very tough: now feed me, let me out, let me in, cuddle me, let's walk on your laptop, pay attention to me, let me sit on your lap, let me taste your porridge. He pushes my laptop away and dropped my phone to the floor a minute ago. I don't have a moment peace. He comes on conference calls too.

I have barricaded myself in the study. He is outside the door miawing and banging his toy on the door.

(he is OK and all the time like this, nothing wrong with him except boredom)

OP posts:
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21
AjasLipstick · 27/04/2018 15:14

Well that sounds better than my cat. Mine licks me on the lips when I'm asleep. Then, when I wake up, she bites be because it took too long.

It's like being french kissed by a damp pan scrubber.

hdh747 · 27/04/2018 15:16

Ok, still getting used to the TLAs on MN - so went to google LTB - the urban dictionary says - Lift the balls. When you ask your significant other to lift your ball sack from your taint. This allows you to air out your balls with a cool fresh breeze of air. Typically, LTB is performed while you are laying down on your back. - erm I'm guessing it's not that?

AjasLipstick · 27/04/2018 15:18

Leave the bastard. LTB

MyMarmitePurrs · 27/04/2018 15:19

Mine insists on coming to the toilet with me and scratches the carpet outside the door if I don't let him in ! He sleeps at the end of the bed and wobetide if my DP puts his leg out form under the covers - he gets shredded to bits. I'll let him out then he cries to be let in like he's got me just where he wants me - then flaming well wants to go out again straight away - absolutely knackering in a 3 storey house !! Does my head in - but I love him - so when he sits on my knee and I say kisses and he puts his head to mine - all is forgiven !!!

Tinkobell · 27/04/2018 15:19

I think most owners are Cat Slaves.....for better or worse!

Zaphodsotherhead · 27/04/2018 15:20

Everyone with a cat is in a controlling relationship.

See also: dogs, horses and, for some reason, chickens.

Dragongirl10 · 27/04/2018 15:20

and l thought my dogs were demanding...

Anniegetyourgun · 27/04/2018 15:20

I used to have to push something heavy pushed against the bedroom door to deter Big Cat. He was not at all a good sleeping companion and would occasionally bite if disturbed. One time he scratched DS2's eyebrow, just missing the eye thank goodness, for daring to turn over in his sleep. Big Cat was quite pragmatic, though, and once he realised he couldn't open the door would mooch off to terrorise Small Cat after only a little thumping and scratching. He was a pain in the butt but he wasn't daft.

Now Big Cat has gone to the Happy Hunting Ground I leave the door ajar so Small Cat can come in. A couple of times a night she will lie down near my head for a few minutes, purring loudly, and will occasionally give me a little dab of the tongue on the cheek or eyebrow, before migrating to the other end and nestling next to my foot. I can live with that.

Anniegetyourgun · 27/04/2018 15:22

Bah, random space ruined my strikeout Angry

Paie · 27/04/2018 15:22

@hdh747

lift the balls

Grin Grin amazing Grin

Juells · 27/04/2018 15:25

Trinity66

He's emotionally abusing you, ltb

Damn, I wanted to be the first to post that 👿

Tawdrylocalbrouhaha · 27/04/2018 15:25

He is clearly desperate for attention. Have you considered a sling? Clearly you would get scratched within an inch of your life, but it would fulfil his obvious need to be near you at all times. Co-sleeping would also help, in the unlikely event that he hasn't already insisted on this.

Tawdrylocalbrouhaha · 27/04/2018 15:28

Something like this, only with more blood and screaming.

In a Controlling Relationship with DCat
Teacuphiccup · 27/04/2018 15:32

I’m currently sat on my sofa with one arm in my coat because fat lad couldn’t wait for me to take it off before sitting on my knee. I’ve been here for twenty minutes. I have loads to do but I can’t move sir flabso so just waiting until he gets bored.

picklemepopcorn · 27/04/2018 15:33

I have a demanding dog. He shouts when he's hungry, or wants me to put a pillow for him in the room where I'm working, he'll paw at my arms when I'm trying to type. Apparently I'm boring and I need to make more of an effort.

Juells · 27/04/2018 15:34

@Anniegetyourgun
He was not at all a good sleeping companion and would occasionally bite if disturbed.

I had a bastard of a cat like that. He'd occasionally deign to lie by my side on the sofa, but if I dared to move my arm he'd scrag me, dig his claws into my arm and bite it. For years I had to get up at four in the morning to let him out, he'd barge open the bedroom door and wail until I gave in. Couldn't have a cat-flap because of security glass in my back door. Eventually I had to have a little house built for him outside, with insulation and cushions and a hot water bottle every night. My how I miss being his servant...not!

mimibunz · 27/04/2018 15:35

My dictator is judging me for having a cold and being grumpy myself. I just encouraged him to relinquish the sofa and he’s sitting with his back to me. Apparently I’ve also made it rain.

IwantedtobeEmmaPeel · 27/04/2018 15:35

LTB and....... get a dog Grin

Juells · 27/04/2018 15:38

Apparently I’ve also made it rain.

It might not be raining at the other side of the house though. That's always worth checking out.

QueenOfAccidentalDeathStares · 27/04/2018 15:38

mine come some how walk over my laptop which is on the state and get christmas music to play.....

spidey66 · 27/04/2018 15:42

I treated myself to a chippy tea last night. Fed puss, then went into the lounge with chippy tea to watch Eastenders. Puss knew I had chippy tea and decided my dinner was better than his own and followed me nagging me for some of the fish. I had to put him in the hall and close the door on him to get some peace.

He still ended up with some of my fish though. Confused

OliviaStabler · 27/04/2018 15:44

Mine sometimes comes and wraps himself round my head in bed. I smile at the snuggling ... Then he starts to snore.

LadyLindaT · 27/04/2018 15:44

I have just cat-sat a young pedigree Maine Coon for a week. He was absolutely gorgeous, except wearing leggings and trainers sent him into a raging frenzy. (Me, not him.) Customised slashed leggings for Zumbawear is a thing, but you don't normally have to prise the claws off.

Weedsnseeds1 · 27/04/2018 15:45

trinity mine can open doors too. The house is a cottage and internal doors have the latches where you press down with your thumb to lift them ( like a garden gate). Depending which side of the door he is, he either stands on his back legs and presses the latch ( he's almost Maine coon sized), or just grabs the bottom of the door and pings it until the latch bounces out.

Frosty66612 · 27/04/2018 15:45

Mine follows me everywhere. If he’s fast asleep on the sofa and I nip upstairs to grab something for second he’ll be there by my feet in the bedroom. I live on my own and can’t go to the toilet with the door shut now as he’ll scratch it like a maniac until I open it again. He even tries to jump into my lap when I’m on the toilet :-/
I don’t think it’s stress as he’s always purring when he’s doing these things. My vet said some cats are just incredibly clingy

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