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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

In a Controlling Relationship with DCat

127 replies

AnaViaSalamanca · 27/04/2018 14:35

Not really AIBU but need to vent.

He is micromanaging and controlling me all the time, but today I am working from home and finding it very tough: now feed me, let me out, let me in, cuddle me, let's walk on your laptop, pay attention to me, let me sit on your lap, let me taste your porridge. He pushes my laptop away and dropped my phone to the floor a minute ago. I don't have a moment peace. He comes on conference calls too.

I have barricaded myself in the study. He is outside the door miawing and banging his toy on the door.

(he is OK and all the time like this, nothing wrong with him except boredom)

OP posts:
Thread gallery
21
mimibunz · 27/04/2018 15:48

@Juells so true!

Anniegetyourgun · 27/04/2018 15:57

Juells

Big Cat also had a habit of sitting on my computer desk, sleeping in a ball at first and then gradually uncoiling, stretching one arm across the keyboard, then the other arm, then the head... when enough of him had taken over the keyboard he started slapping at my fingers for having the audacity to type on his pillow. This was the point at which we disagreed sharply. I am a very bad cat slave because I always won those arguments (eventually). I also won the ones where he sat on my chair, but I usually had to turn the chair pretty much upside-down before he would slither off. This, again, was seen to be all Small Cat's fault.

He was pretty good about using the cat flap, to be fair. Small Cat is the "ooh, it's raining out there, can I go out the front? Ooh, it's raining out the front, can I go through the window? Oh, you shut the window, I need it left it open in case I have to come back in a hurry" type. She can use the cat flap, she just doesn't as long as there's anyone around to open a door or window.

russiandwarf · 27/04/2018 15:57

Lift the balls! Grin

One of mine woke at 5am just to yowl ad infinitum. He sees it as sport. When I shut the bedroom door he camped out for the next few hours scratching the door and kicking off Confused

Made the mistake of letting him drink out of a cup of water in the bath last summer...now there's a stand off every day if the cup is not there with a refill Hmm

spanky2 · 27/04/2018 15:59

I live with an abusive cat. He's so passive aggressive. If I displease him, he wees in the bath.

Trinity66 · 27/04/2018 16:05

trinity mine can open doors too. The house is a cottage and internal doors have the latches where you press down with your thumb to lift them ( like a garden gate). Depending which side of the door he is, he either stands on his back legs and presses the latch ( he's almost Maine coon sized), or just grabs the bottom of the door and pings it until the latch bounces out.

awww, my fella is a Maine Coon so that must be it

TheMagicTorch · 27/04/2018 16:06

@russiandwarf One of mine stands and meows at the kitchen sink until I fill a glass of water for him and put it on the windowsill...

Trinity66 · 27/04/2018 16:06

Damn, I wanted to be the first to post that

Sorry Grin

Weezol · 27/04/2018 16:13

Ana Drugging with catnip is the only answer. The banana has caused considerable discussion over in The Litter Tray section of MN - current PB thread has photographic evidence of the efficacy

www.amazon.co.uk/Catnip-Toys-YEOWWW/s?rh=n%3A471347031%2Cp_4%3AYEOWWW&page=1&tag=mumsnetforum-21&ie=UTF8

pigpoglet · 27/04/2018 16:16

He sound ace ! I have one cat like this and the other two not so much . I lubs him, he is so giving with love and attention and I enjoy it 🤗🤗

Weedsnseeds1 · 27/04/2018 16:19

He also taught himself to use the toilet.
Be grateful if yours just follows you to the bathroom, mine takes notes...

In a Controlling Relationship with DCat
Ollivander84 · 27/04/2018 17:01

Mine has no concept of personal space. See photo
He wants cuddles 24/7. And if you praise him for something he then does that, continuously. So once he said "mama". I was enthusiastically saying "yay! Good boy!"
Every time I walk past him now, he goes "mama?" Hmm

imnotreally · 27/04/2018 18:27

One of my dcats follows me to the loo. I don’t mind d except he leaves the door wide open. The other one knocks things off in my bedroom if he wants to go out in the night and has taught the other one how to do it. Plus they threaten to break my neck if I don’t feed them

Beamur · 27/04/2018 18:35

One of our cats likes to join in with DH when he does conference calls from home. He's a chatty boy.
Both of my cats follow me into the toilet...
Chatty cat also thinks ham will be forthcoming every time the fridge is opened. Or prawns. Looks most put out when it doesn't.

pandarific · 27/04/2018 18:39

We call our little black cat Naboo sometimes, when she gets in a huff and turns her back on us.

this [[https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=oRNx_QK34B8]]

pandarific · 27/04/2018 18:40

I meant like this: Blush

m.youtube.com/watch?v=oRNx_QK34B8

JaceLancs · 27/04/2018 19:01

Reuben regularly stops me knitting and likes to help with jigsaws
Working from home is impossible as he loves a laptop or to sit on any paperwork

In a Controlling Relationship with DCat
In a Controlling Relationship with DCat
In a Controlling Relationship with DCat
russiandwarf · 27/04/2018 20:40

@TheMagicTorch brilliant! I feel vindicated!

Davros · 27/04/2018 20:56

Dcat doesn't like me being on the phone and yowls loudly the whole time. She's a Bengal so it is LOUD. I'm always having to apologise to people. She can also open doors if it's a press down handle. We kept accusing eachother of leaving the basement door open where she wasn't allowed!

YetAnotherSpartacus · 28/04/2018 08:27

Shameless bump.

Dodie66 · 28/04/2018 08:43

My cat sits next to me while I’m knitting and plays with the needles. She also holds on to my hand with a paw to stop me doing anything. Her brother used to wake me up at 4 am to go out. He could also open doors. When he first started doing it we didn’t realise it was him. We went into the back garden and when we came back indoors the front door was wide open and we wondered what was going on. The we saw him opening the door so had to keep it locked. He died 2 years ago

Juells · 28/04/2018 08:51

The late Mr Booboo when he'd just had his eye out (the patch is courtesy of photoshop)

In a Controlling Relationship with DCat
thegreylady · 28/04/2018 08:54

Ours sit on any iPad or book which we are trying to use. If a closed tablet is on the bed they curl up on it. If we are trying to read they settle in front of what we are reading. One gets under the bedclothes in the morning and tries to bite my toes! She is there now, I must get up.

thegreylady · 28/04/2018 08:56

Just turned back the duvet, Mavis is not amused.

In a Controlling Relationship with DCat
HackedOffSeller · 28/04/2018 09:04

I'm currently barricaded in the bedroom in the hope that that ginger menace will let me sleep a whole night without repeatedly flinging himself against the door. It only went on for 1/2 hour at 5am this morning until he got bored.... Only on day three but a massive improvement from him doing it most of the night.

Checklist · 28/04/2018 09:12

It's not just a controlling relationship - I can't go to the toilet in peace! Both of them scratch at the toilet door, if I shut it, so callers at the front door can't see in!

It's DV - this morning at daylight, SisterCat pushed her cold, wet nose into mine as hard as she could, and then slowly sank her teeth in! I continued to pretend to be asleep, so she started patting my mouth with her paw and then slowly stuck a claw into my mouth! Why does she want me to talk to her, when she only understands three words - her name, breakfast and treats?

Still, this week, they have brought us 4 mice - presumably to show us how it's done!

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