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Original poster

When did you start enjoying holidays with the kids?

183 replies

Holidayhell18 · 26/04/2018 19:33

I'm going to sound like an absolute cow I know, but here goes.

DH lost his grandma recently and she left him some money which he decided he wanted to spend on a family holiday to a 'dream destination'.

We're here. It's hell.

DD is 12 months, has just started walking and is into everything. This means she won't keep still and is forever darting off, giving me a heart attack whenever we're near the pool. We took her to the beach but she hated the sand. It's so so hot and I'm struggling to find anything to keep her occupied. The resort is ok but only has a small play area and I don't want her there all day especially in the mid day heat.

I'm a SAHM and normally it's fine because I've built a great little routine for us of groups and classes and friends but here it feels like those first few weeks again where I was totally clueless. DH tries but he'll pack the bag and forget nappies or wipes or hats etc... so I have to take control of everything.

Where we are is beautiful and somewhere I'd have loved to come before children, but I feel like I'm in mourning for my life (my holiday life) pre children where we could eat late and get drunk and lie on a sun lounger reading trashy novels.

So how long was it before you could relax and actually enjoy your holiday? Or does everyone do that already and I'm a shitty person and terrible mother??

OP posts:
bakingaddict · 26/04/2018 20:00

It’s better to do city breaks when they’re 12 months. Put them in the pram and potter about going to museums, parks, enjoying cafe culture or rent a cottage so you can do days out to seaside, farm parks etc and open a bottle of wine when they go to bed. If you’re stuck on an island with not much to do other than the resort it’s going to be hard

oncemoreunto · 26/04/2018 20:00

DC are 9 and we have got to the point where they can swim in the pool for a couple of hours without me watching them like a hawk. They still wake us up at 6am. So early animal watching, zip lining and such play a much bigger role than they used to in my holidays!

suitcaseofdreams · 26/04/2018 20:01

Mine (twins) are 7 now and I’ve enjoyed holidays with them since they were around 3 or 4, BUT these are not the same holidays I would have enjoyed before kids. We don’t go abroad (apart from a fab trip to Disneyland Paris last Easter), we do caravan parks or AirBnB in the U.K., near a beach and/or theme parks. It’s not very relaxing but it is lots of fun and I figure we’ve plenty of time for other types of holiday when they are older...
The other thing which works well for us (am single parent) is to do holidays with other mums and kids - we went camping last year and had a blast and are doing it again this year - the kids all go off together and have fun and we sit and drink wine in the sunshine :-)

Frazzled2207 · 26/04/2018 20:02

Mine were 4 and 2 last summer and it wasn't too bad. There were definitely periods of sitting at the edge of the baby pool watching them play nicely and not being too worried. Elder boy made some French friends too despite not being able to communicate with them. However we could definitely imagine the day where we might sit on the sun loungers and not worry about them too much at all.

TheTurnOfTheScrew · 26/04/2018 20:03

This is of no help whatsoever, but when the DC were really tiny we holidayed in the UK, so we could load the car with stuff like a stairgate and and some familiar toys. We'd then do lots of day trips locally to wherever we were staying.

First foreign holiday was when they were 7 and 3.5, so the youngest no longer needed buggy, potty, travel cot etc, and had just enough sense for a trip to the beach to be more manageable - obviously they still needed close supervision in the sea, but far easier than supervising babies.

We've also learnt that even now at 11 and 7 our upper limit for sharing a family room in a hotel is 3 nights - any longer and we go self-catering for the extra space.

VaselineOnToast · 26/04/2018 20:03

We just had our first family holiday abroad with our 3-year-old son in a self-catering apartment in a city full of culture. Not that we got to experience any of that culture with all the whining and asking to go home/watch TV, and manic behaviour during meals and while trying to get ready in the morning Confused Sad

Also, having to buy groceries and plan meals did not make it feel like much of a holiday sometimes. Next time we'll go all inclusive or half board.

Our best day was when our son fell asleep at lunchtime, meaning my husband and I could eat at a restaurant in peace without having to constantly wrangle a small child who refused to eat anything.

So, you're not alone!

Ohmydayslove · 26/04/2018 20:04

We went all inclusive with our 6 kids a while back. Oldest 3 lads were 16/15/13.,, they had a room on another floor.

They were really popular around the pool and beach and I was fondly proud of their obvious charm and sociability.

After week one the manager sheepishly approached us to say ‘your boys when you sleep they party’

He presented us with a bar bill for £430....... the lads had been buying drinks for many many random girls in the hotel bar, not the inclusive drinks but Malibu brandy etc Angry putting it onto our room as we and the dds innocently slept!!

We laugh about it now Wink 10 years later but beware Grin

Ohmydayslove · 26/04/2018 20:07

We are booked to go away with oldest ds his wife and our 2 year old grandson soon. I wonder why? Wink

halfwitpicker · 26/04/2018 20:08

We've decided no fancy hols till the kids are older. Total waste of time, money and energy. A duck is the same as a Bengal tiger to a 4 year old.

PumpkinPie2016 · 26/04/2018 20:13

I think last year was the first one I truly enjoyed! DS was 3 and it was miles easier and more fun than previous holidays which were just stressful!

He was at a great age - could eat proper good, no nappies, no pram, sleeps well. We went to Cornwall (around 6/7 hour drive from home) and he loved the beach, exploring little villages/towns, having picnics. We chose a cottage with outdoor space where he could play which meant we could have some afternoons sat outside relaxing while he played.

Going again this year and I can't wait!

Queenio24 · 26/04/2018 20:15

When they are much older, just had a more reasonable holiday with 13 & 9 yo. Mine always flatly refused to go to the kids clubs too, so we never managed that when they were little.
We can now manage a few drinks, an hour or two of un interrupted reading & sunbathing by the pool, and cultural visits. Not going to lie, it's not enjoyable when they are young.

DextroDependant · 26/04/2018 20:22

I am a single parent and take my 3 on my own. I think this year and last year were a huge improvement, youngest DS was almost 5 and almost 6.

Previous to that there were enjoyable moments but also it was very difficult at times. The older they get the more the balance shifts.

Mine don't like kids club but do play together for a short period each day which means I can eat h from the sunbed.

Also and I will prob get slated for this but an hour in the shade with YouTube at the hottest time of day was a miracle for me.

HeedMove · 26/04/2018 20:26

Me and my husband use to take an hour each on duty so we had an hour of relaxing in rotation. They all slept for a couple of hours after lunch usually when we could chill together.

Things that entertained them, taking a clean empty paper cup or two in the baby pool to pour water in and out of at side of pool. Those long tubes you squirt water out of, wandering around for walks and chatting to anyone that stopped us, youtube on a phone or tablet (don’t care if anyone judges that) playpark, get some snacks out, playpakr, all go play in the pool together.

The alternating hourly defo helped though.

ikeepaforkinmypurse · 26/04/2018 20:27

honestly? From birth - or 6 months old which was the youngest we went away. Until the end of Primary School, we only went on short flights, so not so much entertaining to do on a plane.
Toddlers are the most challenging on a flight, but with enough snacks, games and new toys, very manageable for up to4 or 5 hours on a plane. (and plenty of exercise before hand)

Plus of holidays: there are 2 adults, instead of 1 to handle the kids.
Everything is new, so no lack of entertainment and distraction, places to visit and so on.
You are so much more relax: no strict routine, no school run, no work, you can enjoy yourself and it doesn't matter if your breakfast last 10 minutes too long. No train to catch.

Holidays are genuinely my favourite part of the year. Disclaimer: we take a tablet and a laptop, so kids can watch cartoons on the plane, or when we want to enjoy a glass of wine in peace!
We have a schedule to occupy everybody even if it's pouring with rain non-stop for whatever time we have booked. It has never happened, but we always have "something" to do when we fancy.

I am never bored or stressed when we are away, even with the little ones, and have never used a creche or holiday club, never needed to.
I am waiting until they are old enough to stay home alone to book a trip to the Maldives though Grin

Taffeta · 26/04/2018 20:29

When they were 3 & 6

But only because the 6 yo is the horror

If they’d been the other way around it’d’ve been 9 & 6 Grin

suzy2b · 26/04/2018 20:32

4yr old would get up before everyone and disappear we were caravaning at well known holiday camp

ikeepaforkinmypurse · 26/04/2018 20:36

sorry,didn't mean to imply that you are a terrible mother.
It's ok to change the routine and have long naps to avoid the worst of the heat,but be outside early morning and late afternoon instead!

The more active you are first thing in the morning, the more chance of a a nap (or watching cartoons on the tv) at midday.

Holidays with kids are completely different to holidays without. They can be just as great, but do not try to replicate the first ones, it can't work.

SnowOnTheSeine · 27/04/2018 06:09

I've enjoyed every holiday - started when DS1 was 10 months. And we've never used a kids club.

We did AI when they were tiny and took it in turns to look after D.C. Whilst the other parent did a sporting activity.

Then we started self catering houses near the beach and with a garden. They were fab too.

Now (DC are 4&7) we tend to take turns playing with the D.C. And relaxing on the beach. Easier on a beach than by a pool. Then do trips out to zoos etc. Only "bad" holiday was with a 3 year old and 7 month old and it rained every day. That was tricky.

Food wise, we just do quick easy food. Not as tasty as usual but quick to prepare.

Nomad86 · 27/04/2018 06:22

Could you take it in turns? DH takes her to the playground for an hour while you swim, then swap. We used to do this before we had dc2. Now it's just chaos!

nordicwannabe · 27/04/2018 06:28

Make use of some childcare - most hotels/resorts will have a list of trusted babysitters. Have some babysitter time both during the day and also for some lovely evening meals. Don't feel in any way guilty about this, and use the time to reconnect and enjoy time with your DH.

iterativeConstruct · 27/04/2018 06:29

I love all our holidays. The first was long-haul when DC1 was 4 months old.

DH travelled a lot for work and we were able to downgrade his seat from Business and get 2 economy seats for about the same price.

Justanotherzombie · 27/04/2018 06:29

No idea. Id 2 under 2 and was horribly sick and exhausted with pregnancy, next year 3 under 3. Both years were crap for me as we went abroad and I was exhausted. Then we did a local holiday with 3 under 4 and I was sick and exhausted with pregnancy again. This year we’ll take the 4 locally again and for the first time I’m looking forward to it. I’m not pregnant and the two oldest are able to follow instruction and play lots. In my mind it can only get better!

Chosenbyyou · 27/04/2018 06:33

Holidays suck!

We went will an 11month old...went badly, we went with a 14 month old...went badly. We took some grandparents with a 18 month old...went slightly better but GPs also want to relax and not really help (don't blame them!).

This year we are going with a 18 month old and a 3.5 year old. Gotta keep trying lol!

checkedcloth · 27/04/2018 06:35

Honestly? Always enjoyed them even when they were toddlers. But I’ve always worked full time and so for me a break from the madness of dropping off at school / nursery, working a 10 hour day etc was always going to be wonderful.

StarlightSparkle · 27/04/2018 06:35

When you choose a resort, forget about how many swimming pools and the food - it’s all about which one has the best kids’ club and children’s entertainment! Some even do kids’ movie nights and sleepovers!

Are there babysitters available where you are now? I know not everyone is happy with leaving their kids with a stranger but luckily I’ve never had any qualms about it if it means I get a night off Grin

From age 3/4 onwards it definitely gets easier. We did a road trip round South America last year with pre-schoolers and it was hard work at times but we all had an amazing time!