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Original poster

To find random men “helping” me to park, incredibly annoying?

173 replies

littlecabbage · 17/04/2018 19:37

Why do some men do this? Occasionally, when I am parking my car, particularly if it involves any kind of reversing, a random nearby man will start beckoning and gesticulating (totally uninvited by me) in the mistaken belief that I am unable to park my car without his “help”.

Yes, yes, I know that he thinks he is being helpful, but I suspect that this happens to women a lot more than it does to men. Does it even happen to men? I find it insulting and patronising. How do they think I manage to park my car on the 98% of occasions where there is no gesticulating (interfering) man in position? Grrrrrr!

(This even happens sometimes when I reverse out of my own drive, something I generally manage to achieve on a daily basis all by myself - what a clever little woman I am Hmm)

OP posts:
HarrietSpecter · 17/04/2018 20:40

Happens to me a lot 😳

I'm little, blonde and drive a 7 seater 4x4, so I think men immediately think I won't be able to park it! As soon as I'm about to pull into a space, they just appear 🤔

I can reverse park perfectly thank you very much (the cameras help!) but I often end up fluffing it because it's distracting and I'm trying not to run over these men who are standing right where I need to park 😂

I'm sure they think they are being helpful and nice, but it's patronising.

..and it is always men who do it, (never had a woman offer to help me park!) and I've just asked my husband - and it's never happened to him and we share the same car! (So it can't be due to people helping because it's a big car!)

HarrietSpecter · 17/04/2018 20:42

So true Cheesytoast - I have that happen to me.
I now hold the pump and say 'I have a very long hose' whilst smiling as I walk around to the other side of the car 😂

NoodlesLivesHere · 17/04/2018 20:44

This only happened to me once and the 'helpful man' is a well known investigative journalist with a TV show.

I was too gobsmacked to do/say something witty so I just carried on reversing round the corner being used to turn the car around then drove off

ZibbidooZibbidooZibbidoo · 17/04/2018 21:05

I have wanted to offer parking help (as in get out of the bloody car and i’ll do it for you) many times, including plenty of men but I’ve never actually offered for fear of either upsetting someone/embarrassing them or angering them and getting punched! Grin (I’m female BTW)

DoctorTwo · 17/04/2018 21:15

Does it even happen to men?

Yeah, it happens to me quite often, but only when I'm delivering to sites that have a rule that reversing without a banksman is against site rules.

Oh, and when I'm on a two man job and have to reverse from a main road I get my 'mate' to jump out and stop traffic so I can do so without impatient arses trying to take the front of my van off.

KinkyAfro · 17/04/2018 21:18

My mum does this as I'm reversing out of her drive, starts flapping her arms around when there's a space. Drives me mad, the neighbours probably think I can't reverse

TroubledLichen · 17/04/2018 21:18

I now hold the pump and say 'I have a very long hose' whilst smiling as I walk around to the other side of the car

Brilliant, must remember that one as I can never remember which side the damn petrol cap is!

Idontbelieveinthemoon · 17/04/2018 21:28

A while ago I was sat waiting for my Dad to come out of hospital. I'd parked in the pick-up/drop-off zone and was idly waiting for him to be escorted to the car. An older lady in a car pulled up and couldn't for the life of her get her car to do as it was told. I watched for a minute or two then leaned out of my window and said "tell me to bugger off if you like but I'm quite good at parking". She was chuffed to bits, I parked it up for her and she said as I went to go back to my car "if you'd been a man I'd have driven into you deliberately, the amount of times to cheeky sods think they can drive better than me".

It's clearly happening to older folk, too.

hdh747 · 17/04/2018 21:35

Brilliant, must remember that one as I can never remember which side the damn petrol cap is!

Most cars have an arrow to tell you, Inside the car - next to the little petrol pump petrol on the fuel gauge. Or it there's no arrow, the actual little petrol pump icon is normally on the correct side of the gauge.

hdh747 · 17/04/2018 21:37

sorry next to the little petrol pump icon - it points to the correct side

StealthPolarBear · 17/04/2018 21:43

Yes it is annoying and it usually starts before you begin the manoeuvre (for those saying maybe you're just not very good).
They stand in the bloody way! Get out of he way so I can see!

honeyroar · 17/04/2018 21:43

Well I never Hdhd, I didn't know that!

It happened to me today for the first time. It was quite off putting, he kept standing right where i wanted to reverse, in the end I just ignored him and he had to get out of the way.

StealthPolarBear · 17/04/2018 21:44

Yes next time I'll try to have the guys say say "please just get out of the way and let me do this in peace"

GabriellaMontez · 17/04/2018 21:45

I had this! Where the fuck do they appear from? I'm a brilliant parker but its very distracting having someone stand behind the car, flailing their hands about When you're reversing.

Nothisispatrick · 17/04/2018 21:47

This has never happened to me, I would drive away if it did, I find people watching me park very stressful and would probably crash.

Notevilstepmother · 17/04/2018 21:49

I had this over and over when I borrowed a big van. I didn’t need their helpful comments. I did tell one of them in no uncertain terms that I’ve been reversing all by myself for more that 20 years and the van is easy due to the big mirrors. I may have been pre menstrual, which didn’t affect my parking, but did affect my mouth control!

ShamelessEjeculate · 17/04/2018 21:56

I actually watched this happening today. I was waiting for a letting agent to show me a flat and when she pulled up and started the process of parking in the space, this builder guy appeared from the building next door and did exactly this. I was internally completely what the fuck?!?
Might go back to where they are working tomorrow and just gently ask, if they would have done that to a man!

Goldenbear · 17/04/2018 21:57

Yes, I've had this- I live very near a station and I've had a male commuter walk by and 'help' me by gesturing at me when I've been reversing on to my drive. It is very hard to reverse in to when commuters park opposite the dropped drive on a narrow road, nothing to do with my competence, all to do with the councils stupid idea to put parking bays opposite our house.

hummusscot · 17/04/2018 21:58

I don't drive but my mum gets this literally almost all the time despite driving for most of her life and mostly driving a large van. Ffs.

tinyme77 · 17/04/2018 22:00

This reminded me of this video:

TorviBrightspear · 17/04/2018 22:04

I had a lad of about 18 point and laugh at me at the petrol station. I went over to ask what was wrong and he said I'd parked "the wrong side" to fill up. I thanked him for his concern but pointed out that either side was fine.

The number of people I see in petrol stations queuing up so they can fill up on the proper side, when there are spaces on the other side empty is weird. I learned years ago that most pumps have long enough hoses. And a lot of these waiting people are men! Why waste time waiting?

I've only had one time when someone tried to "help" me park. They were stood in the way, so I yelled at them to move. Nearly 20 years of living in terraced house with on street parking honed my parking skills.

Mrsmorton · 17/04/2018 22:10

This happens to me when I’m driving with a trailer.
Fucks me right off. Especially because blokes of their age haven’t taken a test & likely never fucking towed anything in heir life. Fuck off you patronising twats.

It’s worse when you’ve got a trailer as it’s all backwards anyway so your ambiguous gesticulating makes you look like you’re at a silent Barry Manilow disco rather than being helpful.

Also my BIL tried to do this to me once. He’s a complete wet fart and couldn’t park his car in a marked space outside my house. Yeah, piss off dickhead, stop projecting.

OwlinaTree · 17/04/2018 22:39

mydog ok.

PotteryLady · 17/04/2018 22:42

I have been driving for 30 years and it never happened to me and I have never needed help to park - would not be happy if someone tried to help Angry

hazell42 · 17/04/2018 22:43

This has happened to me lots of times.
And, despite what other posters are saying, its not because I'm rubbish at parking. Most times they don't even wait to see if you can do it. As soon as the reverse lights go on, they are hand-signalling like they are preparing a jumbo-jet for take off, and intoning 'Come on, you're alright' over and again, while I mutter furiously under my breath and try and pretend I haven't seen them.
Patronising twats.
My ex-husband, who can't drive, always took the part of the driving instructor while we were out, and would call instructions from the passenger seat. He'd shout, 'Alright this side' at every junction. Every fucking junction.
'I know,' I'd say, 'I can see through the window that there is nothing coming.'
Next junction, 'Alright this side.'
Just fuck off.

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