to think "ran away with a black man" is racist

[Slarti]

Seen a discussion on a local FB page, one of those "Who remembers parents/grandparents saying X when you were little" and everyone enjoys the nostalgia. Except this one was "Who remembers asking where you mum was and being told 'She's ran away with a black man'? And before anyone says, it isn't racist!"

My first thought was, are you sure?? Why mention racism in the first place if it's so benign? Isn't it a reference to interracial relationships being taboo/shameful/illicit? Anyway, the response on FB is unanimous - "My DM/DF/DGF/DGM used to say it all the time, so of course it isn't racist." My opinion that it might be hasn't gone down too well at all. AIBU?

I think "Play the white man" means/meant 'be fair'. This is obv. as an alternative to none white skinned people who would be seen as cheats

This is interesting, I've only heard this in this thread but I read it like treat the white man like a fool and play him, like 'play the system'.

Stick - no, I used to hear it in the 70s usually in relation to sports. Play the white man def. meant 'be fair' if there was a point of contention.

MrPerfect yeah, now I have seen the arguments about this phrase I understand this. I just have never heard it or used it. Don't intend on doing so either but when I saw it first posted, that's how I read it.

You didn't answer my question at all there. I didn't ask whether the word short makes something racist. I'm asking why inserting another adjective makes it causative, which is what you (or whoever) you were arguing.

Because people from any race can be short, but only black people can be black.

If you call someone an ugly, short, black man, the focus immediately is on the word 'black'. Because ugliness is often subjective (and a lot of white people historically thought the black people as a race were ugly and linked them to apes etc). You wouldn't decribe someone as an ugly, short black man in real life so it's disingenuous to defend it here.

My parents didn't say "black man." I'm sure you can guess what they said, beginning with D.