Softzilla: You play; you pay!

[Unreasonableunreasonableness]

Before you all get excited: no party yet (I was trying to keep when it was vague so more anonymous but i give up) . I have had a message from softzilla.
'So are we calm enough to sort this oot for tomorrow? '

Isn't a Wendy someone who infiltrates a friend group...and takes over?

But isn't OP is the newcomer, the others have been friends since NCT?

I like the Shoe of Solidarity idea! But they can be fuck-off big shoes, with support arches, AND blinged up too. No reason why not!

Loving the shoe of solidarity! Gonna make a space on my mantlepiece ready for if I ever need it.

Never too old for sparkly shoes.
I myself regularly wear shiny holographic boots
Although I’m told I’m a bit odd quite often

Yarn I once had shiny holographic dr martens. Loved those boots

Sorry OP but I think this should have been nipped in the bud a long time back and having posters so invested, calling for updates, goading you to say 'this, that or other' really isn't helping the situation.

A simple text way back to say you weren't happy with how she'd acted and to not contact you again would have cut all this drama out.

Shoe of solidarity in a 6 please

Mmmm... holographic Doc Martens... not that I want to eat them, you understand.

tiddliewinkiewoo I haven't posted much on this thread but have followed it intently and what you suggest would have had the opposite effect and would have given softzilla ammo to say OP is unreasonable.

Have you rtft?

Softzilla is the kind of woman who thrives on drama and a stripey text from the OP cutting her off is exactly what she wants.

Stroppy not stripey

well OP, you definitely deserve the shoe of solidarity (or SOS) 👟👞👢👡👠

Tiddliewinkiewoo the op did send texts early on to say she was happy to put it behind her and forget it all. In fact if you read the op's posts, other than her texts she sent to say she was happy to put it behind her, she hasn't engaged with softzilla apart from the weird shaking of hands at the party.

It's nice to think that this could all have been nipped in the bud earlier, but I really struggle to see what else the op could have done. Softzilla has shown herself to be deeply manipulative and controlling with a fixation on the op and a flimsy relationship with the truth.

As for posters being invested and goading, there has been a bit of whimsy, but the op has demonstrated that she is well able to make her own decisions regarding how to manage this issue.

Yes I've read the OP's posts (not all admittedly) but from experience reacting to the drama, however small, just feeds the drama.

Any reaction that the OP gives the 'softzilla' will just twist it - why bother? Those who 'know' the OP will be aware of the truth.

Stripey shoes of solidarity all the way. Just don't put them on the table DH will despair

Read " the robber bride" by margaret Atwood. Opens with the 3 protagonists at their "friends" funeral. They are there to make sure she is really dead. Then the book recounts how this woman tore through all their lives. Great read. SZ has shades of zenia (the evil friend).

Follow the gourd!

I think anyone who posts on here regularly knows that posters will get over invested and carried away with a CF thread. The OP is a long time poster on MN and is mature enough to be able to make her own decisions about how she handles the situation with Softzilla.

Ideally, the OP could just block SZ and move on, but, as has been pointed out, the OP is the new member of the group and SZ has been part of the group for some time. So she's stuck with having to deal with this woman if she wants to be part of this circle of friends. Unless they all agree to block her.

Tiddliewinkiewoo: Any reaction that the OP gives the 'softzilla' will just twist it - why bother? Those who 'know' the OP will be aware of the truth.

but op hasn't been reacting.

Ideally, the OP could just block SZ and move on, but, as has been pointed out, the OP is the new member of the group and SZ has been part of the group for some time. So she's stuck with having to deal with this woman if she wants to be part of this circle of friends. Unless they all agree to block her.

Well she doesn't really as apparently the other friends 'know' what SZ is like? And have offered support/informing OP of what SZ is saying?

You can't 'win' with people like SF so best to completely ignore - and tbf the OP has reacted by sending back a couple of texts.

I'm in no way criticising the OP - she's acted admirably - I just think that there are some posters on here too invested and giving bad advice to feed their need for drama and not out of concern for the OP.

But it's likely that the other friends have also been saying things to SZ too. They have been happy to update the OP so they have probably updated SZ as well. People who gossip tend to do it both ways sadly.

The OP could block SZ. But she'll still be stuck with seeing her at other children's parties, as the DCs are friends with each other as well. If she doesn't get to see the messages that SZ sends, then she could be caught out through not being in the loop.

The OP isn't feeding the drama, she's being calm and measured and going about her everyday life, whilst making sure that SZ isn't able to twist things.

Just so I'm clear...who pays for the shoes?

Please please can we call any new thread "Softzilla and the Shoe of Solidarity"...

Seconded.

OP, how about SoftPlayNemesis for the next change?

Also, I have sequinned Converse in a size 2.5 for the smaller mantlepiece.

Sounds like a fab new title.

What we need to do is get SZ to invite us all out for a shoe shopping excursion then she’ll have to pay. Y’know, themz the rulz.

Evil genius!