To be irritated by this?... MIL related.

[Daffodillia]

So we’re staying at mil house. To be fair to her she’s done a lot of the cooking whilst Dh and I chill out. I’ve offered to help but She insists she’s okay.

The thing that irritates me is that when it’s time to serve up she always asks ME to serve the dc’s food up. Which is fine, she doesn’t want to get the portions wrong. BUT she never asks DH!

Now DH is a very capable person, we’re pretty equal when it comes to household stuff, including cooking. But she never asks him!

I was even on the toilet upstairs yesterday and DH was in the kitchen. She walked straight past him and called up to me to come serve the dc’s food!

My dh finds it hilarious, (it’s kind of become an in joke between the 2 of us) and refuses to offer just to wind me up!

I find it sexist, dh finds it old fashioned.

AIBU that it pisses me off?!

boom I’m glad dh is nothing like that!
If he was asked to dish up dc’s food he would. He’s just refusing to offer atm as it wasn’t he who was asked!

Jesting or not, you don't have a MIL problem, you have a DH problem. The irritation you have for MIL belongs directed at your DH who should be demonstrating to his mum that he is a competent parent, not going along with the sexism for tha giggles.

She must know he’s a competent parent yimmini She’s witnessed him being one. All the more reason he finds it funny and plays along.

Your DH's 'joke' would have wound me up more than MIL's question.

If he knows you're upstairs having a wee, why continue with a joke that's going to make you have to rush when he's standing right there? It wouldn't take much for him to say "I can do that".

Oh always I wouldn’t be able to cope with that! Thankfully neither would dh (I think!... Actually he might laugh at me whilst eating his nice pudding!)

He could always say "I can do that mother. Daffodillia has trained me up".

Lannie he came upstairs as
I was coming out of the bathroom, as he knew I’d have a face on . Laughed at me and said go on then wifey!

That would wind me up too.

This week I was at work and DH off was it's kids. ILs came round and took them all out to local all you can eat buffet place. DD apparently ate her weight in orange quarters so MIL asked 'Does your mummy not buy you oranges? They are so juicy and sweet at the moment!'

Now I wasn't even there but why is it MY responsibility to buy fruit and not her sons who is right next to her?!

He just finds it hilarious! I’m not that bothered that he is having fun out of it.
I don’t mind dishing up, so I will play along, but it does irritate me that I am the only one asked.

Aw, pink I just find it so weird! Even if it is a generational thing! We’ve moved on and they’re still alive. Why haven’t they moved with the times too?

It sounds like a generational thing, although I can understand if irritating you.
I can't remember a time that my DF wasn't called in to cut the roast on Sunday's.

Maybe she's just trying to be super polite and let you control everything to do with the kids in case you might get offended in some way if she didn't give you that option?
Have you ever told her you'd be happy with whatever she dished them up?

My MIl does similar stuff, 'Mummy baby needs changing' is my fav. I take said dd walk back to her son give him smelly bestie and say tag your it! We laugh, he changes offending nappy, she stands there looking gob smacked.

I can see the frustration but put it down to weird old fashioned ideas.
As for the pudding post - he would have been mugged for his stodgy pud!

It's hilarious

'mil I'm having a dump Dp will sort it'

'Mil dp's just on his way to sort the dc out I'm reading my last chapter'

Also think it's generational though

'

Oh. I always had to bloody do the dc portions at any of my in laws.
It is a joint effort at my parents, but they tend to put everything on the table so we go in first get the kids dinners served up and then we sit down and do ours.
The in laws however had a real thing about the women knowing how to do it and said they liked it done in a certain way the children’s food always had to be cut with scissors too. Never a knife and fork. Sil and mil would always ask me rather than DP what the dc like to eat etc even if he was sitting next to me.
I always get DP to do the mash potato though, always. Mine comes out lumpy.

It isn't something that I could get bothered about. Have you tried just being busy at that moment , disappearing and saying 'you will have to ask DH?'

She's probably read all the threads where people complain about their mils "force feeding" their dcs.........

Your DH is being a twat.

'Your DH is being a twat.'

Must admit he would be winding me up slightly with all the hilarity

I'm going to use the tried and tested MN line ...ready?

Stay in a hotel if you don't like your hosts.

Problem solved

I'd be more irritated by your DH. He should be offering.
Your MIL is deferring to you as a decision maker. Poor woman can't do anything right.

sakura we’ve known each other for 12yrs, I’m hoping we’re past the super polite phase, but maybe not!... She does it with sil (her dd) too.

minx that’s fab ... I half wish mine were still in nappies just to do that!

daphne the scissor thing is weird!

I don’t know how much busier I could have been fresh than having a wee!

Yes bert that must be it! Afterall, mil’s can’t win!

No he’s not can he’s just having fun and keeping himself entertained in a place he finds utterly boring.

I do like them though new

In that situation I would be extremely irritated with dh. Why would he not just say, dw's having a wee, I'll do it and get on with it?