To think if being "body positive" was promoting anorexia...

[Piglatin]

...everyone would be up in arms? Yet I see the phrase being used more and more on social media by obese women. I don't understand why being "thick", "curvy", "plus size", "voluptuous" are just other ways to avoid saying fat, yet if skeletal women were posting things about being "body positive" most people would see how damaging it is. Are we all meant to pretend that being unhealthily overweight is OK now?!

Are you new? These threads don't tend to go down well and are seen as goady.

No,I've NC. Genuinely not trying to be goady, just don't understand why being an unhealthy weight at one end of the spectrum (anorexic) is clearly harmful, and the other end (obese) is fine as long as you "love the skin you're in".

I think it's more about trying to reclaim the truth that your value as a human being is not diminished by your size (or enhanced by the lack of it). Unfortunately a lot of people appear to think it is.

I sort of get what you mean but actually being overweight isn't as bad for your health as being anorexic (although of course being obese is very unhealthy too). Also a lot of 'plus size' models don't appear to be overweight at all - they aren't a size 0 certainly but are probably still well within a healthy weight.

I also believe that in reference to 'curvy' and 'thick' - this doesn't necessarily celebrate being fat but rather having fat in places which is usually seen as problematic. For example, a while back thigh gaps were all the rage but now you see positive posts about thick thighs. It is perfectly possible to have thicker thighs without being overweight and thigh gaps are an unrealistic goal for many women no matter how thin they are.

Finally, I would argue that thinness (and often a very unhealthy thinness) has been celebrated and, in fact, portrayed as 'the norm' for many years. I still think it is seen as the ideal - films, adverts and TV continue to cast thin, attractive women much more than overweight or even normal looking women. If overweight women, therefore, want to celebrate themselves on social media then I don't see why they shouldn't. After all, there are no less posts of skinny women in bikinis or crop tops or tight outfits and I don't see many critical posts about them (quite rightly). Being overweight or obese doesn't make someone any less deserving than a thinner woman.

Being overweight or obese doesn't make someone any less deserving than a thinner woman.

This!!!!

I kind of get what you’re saying, but body positive isn’t just for “curvy” ladies - some of the normal weight people I follow on Instagram use that hashtag a lot. It’s about loving your flaws and other things that arn’t supposed to be aesthetically pleasing, not just weight.

Difference is that people who are not thin can see very thin women and aspire to that.

Not many people aspire to be fatter than they are.

🍿

I agree OP

Absolutely, and I'm not referring to those that are a bit overweight or anything (I'm about a stone -or two- overweight myself ) but I'm increasingly seeing severely obese women doing it. Obviously I don't think they should be ashamed of their bodies, and of course everyone should be happy in themselves, but it almost seems like it's gone so far that we can't talk about how unhealthy it is.
Maybe IABU, I think since having DD a year ago I'm overly sensitive and maybe slightly paranoid about what may influence her when she's older.

You are in more immediate danger if anorexic and are suffering a potentially fatal mental health condition. Being fat it doesn't necessarily follow that you are also mentally unwell.

I think a degree of fat acceptance is very healthy. Too many women make themselves ill by trying to achieve an impossibly low weight, failing and regaining more weight than they lost (Scarlett Moffatt anyone?) when they would be better off accepting that they are a size 14, say, and could never live a relaxed or content life as a size 8.

At the same time, I don't like the efforts by some extremely overweight people to persuade us all that fat is beautiful. I am "only" about 2 stone overweight and it affects my knees, my stamina, my ability to get up off the floor etc. Being a size 18 plus just cannot ever be healthy (although doubtless more healthy in the short term than being 2 or 3 stone underweight).

Severely obese people like me know how unhealthy they are and also how disgusting lots of people think they are.

Problem is, many people who eat for emotional reasons end up stuck in a cycle of self-loathing, eating more to dull the pain, gaining weight, despising themselves more, eating more, gaining more and on it goes. Fat shaming does not help, not even for a second. It will send most people who are emotional overeaters into a massive downward spiral.

I agree with lots of what himalaya said.

I would argue that many of the #bopo bloggers require validation for their looks, (and I agree that this need for validation has stemmed from society seeing skinny women as the norm for many years), and therefore not entirely happy in their own skin.
I would also worry that some are using the body positive movement as a way to justify their weight as being okay as ‘they are happy and healthy’ when in reality obesity is not healthy. This is all coming from someone who could really do with losing weight for my own health, not because society says I should.

*GlittercheeksOakleaf

Severely obese people like me know how unhealthy they are and also how disgusting lots of people think they are.

Problem is, many people who eat for emotional reasons end up stuck in a cycle of self-loathing, eating more to dull the pain, gaining weight, despising themselves more, eating more, gaining more and on it goes. Fat shaming does not help, not even for a second. It will send most people who are emotional overeaters into a massive downward spiral.*

Completely.

I follow a lot of "bopo" Insta accounts and a lot of it is to do with accepting and loving your scars, stretch marks, all imperfections and not to do with weight.
I also think that average healthy weight people don't accept or like fat people a lot of the time and so they have to form their own community. Being underweight is a lot more socially acceptable than being fat it seems!

I also think it kind of defeats the whole "I don't need validation for my body" vibe, when what they're doing is seeking validation for their bodies, just in a different way. It's all for "likes" and retweets etc whether it's a size 0 or size 26. If truly content with our bodies, surely we wouldn't need to post anything about it?!

I’d suggest being severely overweight is a mental health condition the same as being anorexic.

Thick/curvy is just another impossible standard for women because the actual definition of “thick” is big boobs, a tiny waist and a big arse (usually 36,26,36). Very hard for most women to achieve.

Being overweight just isn’t as medically dangerous.

It’s so much better to actually appreciate what your body can do, love yourself, prioritise self care, nurture your body, than to get trapped into some horrible self loathing cycle where you don’t go out, don’t buy clothes, stop wearing make up, stop taking exercise, stop having sex, and develop mental distress.

The MORE you actively appreciate the body you have the more you naturally look after it.

Overweight women are routinely abused by strangers. Routinely. Even when they’re out running or exercising or walking their children down the street. They’re discriminated against at interview. And every fucking newspaper and magazine tells them in a myriad of subliminal ways they are WORTHLESS and repulsive.

So no, I don’t think the body positive movement has anything to apologise for.

One of my favourite arms of body positivity is Curvy Yoga - a deep appreciation of the body is gained by practising yoga even if overweight as you focus on what your body can accomplish.

Women don’t need the ‘you’re repulsive’ message from society in the guise of ‘Oh it’s not healthy’. Instead we should focus on encouraging EVERYONE taking part in exercise and healthier eating and reducing the barriers to it. We need to tackle poverty as so many overweight women are nutritionally starved and from the lowest income households.

So much to do, so little time

I completely agree OP.

People that fall into the obese category are not healthy like many of them claim to be. Even if they don't feel the effects of their weight now, it will cause them problems and illness soon enough.

Obese people are a huge drain on NHS funds, more so than smokers even.

Being obese shouldn't ever be celebrated and obese people shouldn't be allowed to promote their 'body confidence' crap to others.

Completely agree that fat shaming does not help anyone. That much is patently obvious and I really couldn't agree more!

However, this thread is about the opposite to fat shaming - the efforts by some to put a positive spin on being very overweight. I think some of us feel uncomfortable with that, just as we feel uncomfortable when we see obviously sick looking young women on the catwalk.

This is a complicated one.

Yes I think it's gone too far now where it's seen as very wrong to mention anything to do with being overweight. Someone even posted a thread saying the cancer adverts saying obesity was the second biggest cause was fat shaming.

On the other hand people should not be judged solely on their weight.

Being significantly under or over weight should not be promoted as a positive body image because of the risk of health complications.

There is always an outcry if too thin models are used in the modelling industry, it's seen as promoting an unhealthy lifestyle, yet if an overweight model is used it's celebrated and the company applauded. To say something negative about the overweight model is seen as terrible. To say something negative about the underweight model is seen as righteous.

Seriously?

You don’t think the media / society already glorifies an unextrememy underweight body shape? You don’t think that we are already told that being very underweight is ideal? I find this much more concerning than larger people trying to accept their size and push away negativity that causes them immense problems.

Your periods can stop when you’re as little as 3lb underweight. Yet pretty much every actress and model we see is significantly below that (with notable exceptions). Heart and other organ problems come next. It’s well known that fasting, purging and drug abuse are commonly used by people in that industry to keep weight down.

And you’re concerned about people simply accepting that they’re bigger?

I think your concern is misplaced.

FancyNewBeesly

Yes, seriously. 60% of the UK population is overweight, not underweight.
Most health conditions and illnesses are a direct cause of poor diet and lack of exercise.
So yes, I am serious.

And you’re concerned about people simply accepting that they’re bigger

No, I'm concerned about people celebrating obesity.

The thing is anorexia is nothing about body positivity, people with anorexia generally hate their bodies and are punishing themselves by severely restricting food. Feeling OK in your own skin, being kind yourself and accepting yourself as you are is absolutely fine for everyone irrespective of size. If that happens to be someone very obese or someone very thin, loving yourself is equally valid, that's the point.