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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think my friend sends her daughter to school holiday camp too much?

169 replies

Rosgos · 03/04/2018 16:58

My friend is a SAHM to an 8 year old little girl. Was trying to arrange a play date for her and my DD.
Found out she sends her to the school-run holiday 'camp' daycare during every half term, easter, and summer holiday from 7.30am-1.30pm. Except the 1 week she spends with her dad (separated parents) in the summer and the 1 over xmas (and she's with him EO weekend), this little girl only seems to have proper time off from school with her mum and stepdad for a week over xmas. I couldn't handle that! As a mummy or as a child!

I'm sorry I just couldn't imagine doing that if i were a SAHM with no work commitments (I'm a teacher so I'm off during school hols and DDs do a week in the summer somewhere outdoorsy for the experience - but the school-run one is just so boring!)

I'd want my DC with me as much as possible!!

OP posts:
Sprinklesinmyelbow · 03/04/2018 18:14

Well there is weekends isn’t there ikeepaforkinmypurse? We will use holiday clubs as both work FT and I see your point because if I didn’t I would try and arrange day trips etc but at the same time, drama/ coding/ football/ music camp sounds fantastic and far more of a privilage than going round the local museum or to the beach or something

randommmmmmmmmmm · 03/04/2018 18:14

How do you know that her daughter is not affected by the change of routine when not at school.

Come children thrive from routine and a school club in the absence of School can work for such children.

Either was I really feel we shouldn't be judgmental of other mothers.

MiaowMix · 03/04/2018 18:16

Fair 😂

paxillin · 03/04/2018 18:17

Perhaps it is an excuse to avoid the playdate and she's not really going.

I tend to be fully booked until Easter 2021 if I don't want to do something, but don't want to say.

willynillypie · 03/04/2018 18:18

ikeepaforkinmypurse

Completely agree

Tawdrylocalbrouhaha · 03/04/2018 18:19

I don't think the OP is being goady - it sounds like she was hoping to prevent holiday boredom by arranging a play date with DD's friend, and is finding it inconvenient that the friend's mother has forward planned the whole hols. Which she has probably done in part to avoid being used as holiday childcare...

GreatDuckCookery6211 · 03/04/2018 18:24

The Op could have her DD's friend round in the afternoon Tawdry. And bully for her if she finds it inconvenient the other child isn't around in the mornings - maybe she should be doing stuff with her instead?!

Sprinklesinmyelbow · 03/04/2018 18:25

Yes- the camp is only a half day? Plenty of time to spend together

ClaryFray · 03/04/2018 18:26

Goodness grief.

I'm sure ive seen moaning about a women who kept her children with her all the time and them not getting an independence.

When will we as mothers and women stop blasting each other on our life choices?!? Fuck a duck op, get a grip.

gingergenius · 03/04/2018 18:27

Oh dear. Confused

hobnobsaremyfavourite · 03/04/2018 18:28

Well this is all playing out exactly as the op expected Hmm

FrangipaniBlue · 03/04/2018 18:33

I don't see why so many are posting to the effect that their DC are going to camp to see their friends - doesn't anyone do playdates at home any more?

I have no garden, only a modest back yard so would you suggest I have a group of 10yr old boys playing rugby in my front room (because that's what camp DS is doing this week) ??

Erm, that'll be a no from me!! Confused

Also, isn't saying that instead of going to holiday camp DC should have play dates contradictory to the whole "they should be spending time with their parents" argument?

If they're on a play date they're spending time with their friends (funnily enough, exactly like camp!!) meanwhile I have to entertain the other kids parents who lets face it, I probably wouldn't choose as my own friends if our kids didn't play together Hmm

DS chooses to go to camp, I can go to the gym or catch up with MY OWN friends - win fucking win I say!!

minionsrule · 03/04/2018 18:33

I work half the school hoks, DS still wants to go to sports camp on the days i am off. This week dh is off all week but ds has asked to go to sports camp all week...... someone shoot me

SusanneLinder · 03/04/2018 18:33

When mine were wee, I would have loved there to be a holiday camp, so the little darlings could have fun and I could get peace.
Fuck getting up for 7.30am though

PortiaCastis · 03/04/2018 18:37

Why is it your business OP?

CupofFrothyCoffee · 03/04/2018 18:42

Why shouldn't a SAHM use these clubs as much as working parents? The club is only on til 1.30 so she'll be spending the rest of the day with the DC. I don't see a problem with this at all.

RoadToRivendell · 03/04/2018 18:45

It seems that the child is happier if that's how her own mother feel, it's a bit sad really.

So sad.

ikeepaforkinmypurse · 03/04/2018 18:47

Sprinklesinmyelbow
You have time with your kids at the weekend you? Between parties, homework, sport, sport competition, sleepovers, we don't have a full day together until I specifically book it!
We do have a rule that no housework is being done at the weekend, but even so, there's not much time for anything. No one is complaining, but weekends are not family days.

lattewith3shotsplease · 03/04/2018 18:50
Confused
Sprinklesinmyelbow · 03/04/2018 18:50

Well tbf I sort of see parties and classes as family time but mine are too young to go off on their own so that’ll change

FrangipaniBlue · 03/04/2018 18:51

Between parties, homework, sport, sport competition, sleepovers, we don't have a full day together until I specifically book it!
We do have a rule that no housework is being done at the weekend, but even so, there's not much time for anything. No one is complaining, but weekends are not family days.

So one parent chooses to let their DC do activities in the holidays but spends time with them at weekends.

You choose to let your DC do activities all weekend but spend time with them in the holidays.

How the fuckity fuck is one any different to the other??

Pots and Kettles spring to mind

raindropsandsunshine · 03/04/2018 18:53

Wow. I also am able to spend all holidays with my children but would never be so judgemental of those who don't! It's just a matter of having a job that allows it. Not everyone does! This is a really unkind post.

ikeepaforkinmypurse · 03/04/2018 18:54

You choose to let your DC do activities all weekend but spend time with them in the holidays

kids need to exercise, so regular sport is a necessity I am afraid.
I am not in charge of the birthday party schedule, around here they are only held at weekend. It's not the same to give them the choice to go for a couple of hours with friends, or to make them go to a camp every day of their school break because you need your me time Hmm

The difference is that I don't turf my kids away every weekend!

hobnobsaremyfavourite · 03/04/2018 18:57

I was going to say “are people really this stupid “
Clearly they are

ikeepaforkinmypurse · 03/04/2018 18:57

sent too soon

I also know that MN are all super career women with loads of money, but I might be able to afford to take my kids away 3 or 4 times a year, but I surely can't afford to take them on mini-break every single weekend like some of the posters!