Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Texting after first date

429 replies

JapaneseCat · 30/03/2018 14:31

When is too late for a guy to text? I felt he was into me but no text since we met last night. He made some references to “playing it cool” while we were on the date.

OP posts:
buddhasbelly · 30/03/2018 20:30

I've had "good to meet you" in texts in both a "i'd like to do it again" way and also a "but I don't think we clicked way." (Followed by "I'm sure you're disappointed" he was a peach...)

I left this comment just to add something to my placemark Grin

DragonMummy1418 · 30/03/2018 20:31

ARE you keen to see him again?
Just send a message along the lines of;

Hey, I've just got my work schedule and I'm free on x day if you wanted to meet up again. x

Belphegor · 30/03/2018 20:31

What's wrong with being keen?

Just text and say "oh btw, just seen Joseph and the Technicolor Dreamcoat has just started up again and I remembered how you said you loved Andrew Lloyd Webber. Want to go along on Thursday?"

buddhasbelly · 30/03/2018 20:32

Actually wait my positive good to meet you was "it was really great meeting you"

Wow neither of my comments have been useful sorry OP!

buddhasbelly · 30/03/2018 20:35

Yes @Belphegor and then when he says sorry busy Thursday (with no counter sugggestion) the OP can say "oh whoopsie me I meant Friday"

Works like a charm Grin

SnowiestMountain · 30/03/2018 20:35

Good text OP, the 'nice to meet you' slightly formal but otherwise good.

I can't believe I'm spending my good Friday waiting for a man I don't know to text a woman I don't know either!!

Thirtyrock39 · 30/03/2018 20:39

I think he will reply by 21:30 🕤 tonight

Fruitcorner123 · 30/03/2018 20:41

thirtyrock are you the date himself?

Thirtyrock39 · 30/03/2018 20:42

No I'm just way over invested!

buddhasbelly · 30/03/2018 20:43

@DragonMummy1418 I think the word schedule has been universally vetoed Grin

TrippingTheVelvet · 30/03/2018 20:46

I think you lost the game when you didn't text saying you got home safely. That really pisses me off. And even if it didn't, that text definitely killed it!

Aridane · 30/03/2018 20:53

He said for me to text him saying I’d got home but I feel like if he did the asking out, it’s his job

Baffled 😕

Fruitcorner123 · 30/03/2018 20:57

I will be checking back in at 21.30 just in case thirtyrock has some kind of sixth sense.

QueenofmyPrinces · 30/03/2018 21:02

I think he will wait until tomorrow to give the OP a taste of her own ‘playing it cool’ medicine.

Shimshiminysheroo · 30/03/2018 21:06

Any word?

Popc0rn · 30/03/2018 21:06

She didn't let him know she got home safe until the next evening...I would very much doubt that he'll reply tonight. Especially as it's a Friday/bank holiday. Guys have egos/doubts too, and OPs reply didn't exactly sound like she was interested in seeing him again, came off like more of a polite courtesy to me tbh. If he replies my vote is on Sunday.

Original poster
JapaneseCat · 30/03/2018 21:07

Nothing! He has been online. I don’t think he will reply somehow!

OP posts:
Fruitcorner123 · 30/03/2018 21:09

There might be an identical thread on 'dadsnet' with all the users telling him not to reply until tomorrow and to play it cool and giving him ideas for how to word a text.

iMatter · 30/03/2018 21:10

Sorry OP but I think your text was a "thank you and goodbye" text.

I hope I'm wrong.

sonjadog · 30/03/2018 21:14

Too early to say. You kept him waiting for the text saying you got home okay, so he is unlikely to jump on it with sending a reply to you.

Popc0rn · 30/03/2018 21:15

Well he's probably seen that you've been online earlier today and is a bit put out you didn't text him when you got home and have only just sent that lukewarm message! He paid, kissed you, asked you to text him when you got in...how much more reassurance would you need that he was into you?!

AnaViaSalamanca · 30/03/2018 21:17

I still think if someone likes you, they would text, whatever text you have sent now, if he likes you he would answer immediately. Playing it cool is not a good sign

Fruitcorner123 · 30/03/2018 21:19

Playing it cool is not a good sign

But the OP played it cool and she is clearly keen.

g1itterati · 30/03/2018 21:22

Sorry to chip in again but I'm ill in bed.

Jap - how do you know he's been online.

iMatter - even if it was a "thankyou and goodbye text" - which I absolutely don't think it was - then all the more reason to text back if he was interested, surely?

Please don't over-analyse the wording. If someone texts you, they are keeping lines of communication open.

I guess if he texts now, the onus is on him to ask you out again, so maybe he's working out what he wants next?

Definitely don't do any follow up texts because it will push him away if he thinks you're too keen.

WhatsGoingOnEh · 30/03/2018 21:23

I wouldn't have texted but your message was fine. DEFINITELY don't send any more.

Keep busy, plan fun stuff, try not to stress. If he likes you, he'll be in touch. If not, he's a twat. 😀