To think waiting rooms are not playgrounds

[FairfaxAikman]

Feeling like utter crap today and functioning on very little sleep as a result I hauled myself to a GP appointment this morning.
In the waiting room was a toddler who was LOUD!
They were running around the whole of the large waiting room pushing a large digger and shouting and squealing at the top of their voice.

I'm all for kids playing and enjoying themselves, but AIBU to think a Doctors waiting room, which is full of sick people, is not the time or place for it?

Hail all you perfect mothers. A round of applause 👏🏻... Try being a single parent to two small children; one with ASD and an abhorrence for waiting, even two minutes. If you think this is enjoyable, then you are delusional at best! No matter how much soothing, reading, distracting having been done. Some of you need to learn tolerance! I will aim for your superior parenting techniques in future. Alternatively, I will hope that one day you are faced with a meltdown of similar vigour as I am daily, for something seemingly trivial (to an atypical person)! Ignorance is bliss eh 😉

God it's not always easy to keep them quiet, especially if there's a long wait. I had years of being in and out of hospital waiting rooms with small children in tow. It was utter hell trying to keep a lid on it, especially after a few hours waiting. My kids are older now and it's much easier. But there's no harm in having a little tolerance for those who are struggling.

Some people just don’t teach their children how to behave in public, whether it’s a drs waiting room, a restaurant, a train.......
It’s not acceptable!
Noisy, screaming kids is a nightmare at any time.
Sort it out in the home then you can sort it out in public!

Just realised.....
You’re all coming for me.......

YABU.

Why does everyone seem to have trouble keeping a toddler quiet? I was never allowed to run around or make a noise at drs/shops/waiting rooms etc and my kids were same. They knew how to behave and I can't remember having to stop them running around because they would occupy themselves with the toys available. Peony has the right attitude, it's annoying for her so must be annoying for others so prepares. It's same in coffee shops/ restaurants where parents think because there offspring are toddlers they can't be expected to behave/be quiet, when did this all start? I would never have run around /shouted/squealed other than when out playing/at park etc and I wasn't a quiet kid. My kids went out with us for large family meals and behaved as do their children now.

If I felt so intolerant of noise from children, I would carry some earphones around wherever I went... I do the same, howevwr it’s self-righteous adults I like to block out. God forbid a child make a noise. Sometimes I forget I live in Victorian England.

When you have a profoundly disabled child with a raging ear infection it is not possible to keep them quiet. I settle for no one getting punched.

Ragmayo I do understand how difficult it can be as I also have a child with a disability which makes sitting still/playing quietly difficult but there are ways of managing it as I suggested. I’m not saying my children behave impeccably but I would certainly remove them from a situation if they were running around squealing at the top of their voice and disturbing other people especially when those people are feeling unwell as in this case. It’s just manners and respect for others imo

sockwombi your situation is different as your child was in pain. I can’t imagine anyone criticising you under those circumstances and I hope it was remedied quickly 💐

Many other patients may have enjoyed watching the toddler............to me there is nothing nicer than seeing a child playing.

Running around is maybe different and my youngest especially was bad for this no matter what we tried to do to stop him. So we stopped going until he gets older. Or we pick places to eat where he can play whilst we wait.

I mean ran about in restaurants - I couldn’t stop taking him to GPs

The child was two. I'm impressed that so many of you can remember being that age. You cannot between 0 and 2 train a baby to behave appropriately in different situations it's utter rot regardless of SN or not. Usually parents avoid places that will be difficult but you can't avoid going to the doctors. Probably there are some particularly docile dc but both of mine would have been a nightmare at that age.

I don't remember 2yos walking around with books on their heads in my generation either. My mother had lots of nightmare tales about me at that age.

I really dislike people letting dc run around restaurants but that's a completely different situation that you have a choice over and you can take them out.

jellyjellabi my child ( almost adult really) is often noisy even when he is not in a lot of pain. He will be noisy waiting for a routine appointment despite having constant attention from his adults and people just have to accept that is who he is.

Jelly, I’m glad you are able to silence your child in these situations. Some mothers don’t feel that this is necessary 🙋🏻‍♀️. Children are allowed to show different emotions and express themselves. They are human beings after all! A Drs surgery is a necessity at times and I will not feel judged by ignorant people, because my child cannot cope well in these situations. We don’t do many things, for example go to cafes and restaurants. This is nothing to do with respect for supposed “adults”, but the fact that my CHILD can’t cope in such places. I can’t stand people who tut at children or parents of children who make noise. They really need to find something significant to complain about. I agree completely Sockwomble.

To be honest I find this thread very goady.
My first 2, yes I could have easily entertained them in a waiting room at the age of 2. Distraction, bribery etc.
My third however, is non verbal ASD and has hearing issues. So not only does the rule book not apply, but with him I had to tear it up and throw it away so to speak.
He squeals when he's happy. Loudly. He can't hear himself. Imagine that in a waiting room full of disapproving faces. Actually scratch that, for the most part people are understanding and find him funny.
The other day I took him to watch his sister's Easter assembly.....in a church no less!! Gasp!! He was squealing away very happily and the sound carried and you know what? Even the vicar laughed.
I'm so pleased not everyone is as judgemental as some on here.
Rant over.

Sometimes I'm so glad that I grew up in the 90's when kids were seen as members of society and not some nuisance that should never ever inconvienance members of the public or their parents weren't doing a good enough job.
I've waited up over an hour before in a surgery that provides nothing to occupy the time, no toys, magazines or television. I'd like to see one of these magical toddlers who will be read to for all of that time. Can't you just ignore the kid and get on with it the same way people do with obnoxious adults.

Lofari, that sounds so lovely! I’m so glad you aren’t curbed by joyless and ignorant people. It is no wonder there are so many mental health issues in our society, with the amount of intolerance about. Spirited children would probably have been institutionalalised 150 years ago. Maybe a time machine would help some of you?

Waiting rooms are a pain when you don't know how long you're going to have to wait.

I think this is the crucial part. If you're in a cafe or something then you can forestall the really hideous behaviour by leaving when they start to be disruptive. But in a doctor's waiting room you don't know if you'll be waiting another thirty seconds, two minutes or forty minutes, so you don't know if you can take them outside for a bit to get the wriggles out, or if that will mean you miss the call to go in. And heaven forbid said toddler should need a wee and need to spend two minutes in the loo.

In the past I've asked the receptionist to give me an idea of how far behind they're running (the clever automated check in system always says there's no delay even if they're an hour behind) so I can manage the child, and they're really sniffy about it. "You can't leave. You have to sit and wait like everyone else." Really? When I could remove this squirmy toddler from everyone's morning for half an hour and still be ready and waiting when the poor doctor finally gets through her list? I understand that some people are crap and would fail to come back, but you aren't going to make up a forty-minute delay over the next three patients

I'm not a "sap" of a mother at all, my DS will always be disciplined accordingly. I despise noise and he is always told to quieten down when in public.

He ignores everything I say and does as he wants.

Sometimes it can go the other way! I was at my hospital for a routine maternity appointment that went badly, and I ended up being shifted to day assessment and then delivery suite. It was about 6 hours in total (they didn't induce me after all).

There was another woman in there who was also being sent to the same places, and she had her two twin daughters with her. They were older, about 8, but I've never seen such patient and calm kids before. They had no iPads, books or toys, and they just sat together on one chair, staring solemnly around the various waiting rooms. Honestly, I was getting stressed myself, and found the adults yabbering away in the waiting rooms more annoying!

He ignores everything I say and does as he wants

Aah it seems the non-judgemental,non-child hating and understanding mums have come out to play.How thoroughly refreshing

Mums who know how to manage their children in these situations do not hate children.
Just the opposite. They love their children enough to guide and teach them and don't give up just because sometimes the situation is difficult.
Suggesting they are child haters is nasty.

Are you suggesting that people whose children are noisy don’t love them 😕? Come on Gottagetmoving! Luckily not every person is the same, this extends to children and allowing them to be different. Not expecting them to conform in all situations and allowing individuality should be the norm. I too have experienced people who blatantly dislike children, some of my own family members. Trust me I have been constantly consistent in my parenting, my children are polite, kind and considerate. However, I do not expect silence at all times and would worry if my children were unable to exhibit their emotions or voice their opinions, just because they are children.