To think waiting rooms are not playgrounds

[FairfaxAikman]

Feeling like utter crap today and functioning on very little sleep as a result I hauled myself to a GP appointment this morning.
In the waiting room was a toddler who was LOUD!
They were running around the whole of the large waiting room pushing a large digger and shouting and squealing at the top of their voice.

I'm all for kids playing and enjoying themselves, but AIBU to think a Doctors waiting room, which is full of sick people, is not the time or place for it?

auditqueen I used to be at my gp's two days after yet another traumatic miscarriage, and ERPC, which to me was the death of another child, when all I wanted to was lie on the floor and cry my eyes out - while having to keep a toddler under control! And no, having DC1 does not make secondary infertility/recurrent miscarriage any easier to bear in view of the massive feeling of failure and pressure from society to provide an only child with a sibling!

This reminds me of a time when a visit to the drs descended into utter chaos!

2 y o Nathan was running around screaming excitedly while mum played candy crush on her phone. Every now and then she'd whine "quiet Nathan!" Without looking up from her phone.

A man, who looked very unwell, wandered over to the mum to ask quietly and politely if she could quiet her son a little as he had a splitting headache and the screaming wasn't helping. Her reply? "What do want me to f@cking do - tie him to a chair and gaffer tape his gob shut?" The man sloped back to his seat.

The next time darling Nathan ran screaming past the man, the man involuntarily projectile vomited all over him, not once but 3 or 4 times! Nathan was rooted to the spot in shock (the screaming stopped though) and mum kicked off a hormonal shit storm of biblical proportions. She blamed everyone but herself.

So, while many of us mums do the best we can, I would say that most people will appreciate that we are trying our best - but there will always be those few who don't - and let us all down!

its not ideal. however at my previous doctors they had a sit and wait session for 3 hours every morning. it was like some kind of endurance test. added to which you were not allowed to take a pushchair in. so frankly even the best kid in the world can only be distracted for so long.

The only time this kind of thing bothers me is if the parent makes no attempt to engage with the child at all. Then I feel a bit sad that their child seems to be less important than their phone.

Small children are utterly random, and will just go off on one. I have every sympathy with a parent trying to deal with a small child in an enclosed space. It's the parents that make no attempt at all that are the problem.

Mind you, I've been known to pull faces at toddlers building up to a full tantrum in places like supermarkets, as the surprise often distracts them and they are then engaged in something. I do usually make eye contact with the parent (usually they have red rimmed eyes and look knackered) first though and give them a supportive look. I've had some fascinating conversations with pre school kids in waiting rooms, and I'm in waiting rooms a lot.

YANBU. I'd be the same. I'm a mum, I've been in a waiting room with a toddler for long periods of time because Dr running late, but I sat and talked to her and kept her occupied. I realise not evey toddler is so easily diverted (and some may have reasons behind their behavior, autism for example) but I've also witnessed on many many occassions (Dr's, hosp, planes, etc) parents who clearly think their little angel is cute as a button for screeching and banging about, or just couldn't give a shite about anyone else around them. It isn't fair to others.

@minniebirdie
Of course! How dare these parents of disabled children blame their children’s disabilities on their disabilities & yeah those kids that can’t walk- it’s the parents fault for being too lazy to teach them.
You’re obviously so smart @minniebirdie being able to diagnose children just by looking at them! What do we even need doctors for when we have you eh?!

Oh gosh I definitely remember taking fun trips to the doctor with my dcs do they can run around. Get a grip OP you have any idea what it’s like to feel like you’re dying and have to keep a toddler entertained for 2 hours?!

I do try and keep them quiet but it can be tricky sometimes.
And what if the poor mum was feeling really poorly. It’s hard watching kids when you feel terrible.

I was getting the evil eye the other day when we left the nurses room. My boy had screamed the place down and was still screaming saying it hurt leaving the room.

The poor sod had just had the MMR so don’t bloody look at me like that

I confess that I haven’t read more than a few responses but I am seeing the same old ‘how do you expect to keep a toddler from running round the room being loud’ stuff.
I had three children in less than four years, one of whom has a lot of health problems so we spent many an hour in hospital waiting rooms and cafes. It wasn’t so hard to keep them from being a nuisance. It just took some thought and a desire to be considerate. People will put up with the odd bit of over-exuberance if they can see that the parent is making every reasonable effort to keep the children under control. It really wasn’t that hard.

There are children’s toys and books at my GP. Maybe not a children’s play area, but perfectly appropriate for children to play .

If I am in a waiting room with noisy children, I just think I am glad I don’t have to deal with them. I remember needing eyes in your backside and entertaining them . Now I just manage to switch off. I’ve had 4 children and have six young grandchildren so I know how hard it is. Parents should try but if it doesn’t work I don’t know what they can do! I have in the past tried to engage with a child but some parents don’t like it anymore, so I don’t do it.

My DD1 has had to go for regular appointments at the hospital since she was a baby, we've taken her since she came to live with us aged 1. She wears glasses and hearing aids and has had regular check ups all her life. Waiting rooms are a pain when you don't know how long you're going to have to wait. We always did our best to keep her entertained, sometimes there were toys, sometimes not. We always did our best to keep her entertained, and not disturbing the other people in the waiting room.

But as a result I have a lot of sympathy for parents having to entertain bored toddlers in waiting rooms.

I hate going to the go with my 2 and 4 year old in tow. There is always about an hour wait time and there are no toys. I take snacks and toys but short of chaining them to the chairs I'm stuck.

You are completely right but I have to say that when my son was two he was a nightmare in any confined space like a doctor's waiting room. One doctor commented that he was the worst child he'd ever seen for misbehaviour.

Didn't know whether to feel shame or pride.

BTW, my son, at 29, is lovely now.

No yanbu it’s totally unacceptable to allow children to run around like this and the parent should take them outside for a few minutes to calm down if they get too noisy /boisterous. It is hard but think ahead and take some quiet toys, game or books to keep them occupied. I would never allow my dc to cause that much disruption. Children are pandered to too much and need to learn when to b quiet

People fucking hate children in this country. It sounds like the toddler was being absolutely fine. Children play and make noise, but they are members of society, just like you, and that child had as much right to be there as you. Wind your neck in. Or, if you really are so intolerant of everyday noise, get yourself some earplugs. Hth.

You are unreasonable OP. You have described a young child occupying themselves in a waiting room by playing. I am unsure what you expected that child to do instead in a confined space. Had the parent stopped the child from playing he would likely have screamed the place down - then you really would have had a headache.

Aah it seems the non-judgemental,non-child hating and understanding mums have come out to play.How thoroughly refreshing

@jellyjellabi I think you should put more thought behind your comments. Such as how children should learn when to be quiet. Some children are born with disabilities which prevent this, my own child included. I'm sure you'd never suggest a physically disabled child should just learn when to walk. I found your comments shocking and judgemental, though I completely understand it could be lack of awareness so I wanted to change that hopefully.

It's not ideal for a child to be doing that but the mum probably feels like shit too that's why she's there. And you're the lucky one. You get to leave! She has to go home with them even while she's sick and deal with them there too.

I think it’s a balance. Normal, reasonable noise of play or talking - should be ok - if people don’t like it then imo that’s their problem (and seems from this thread like plenty of people don’t!). Shouting or screaming, not ok.

*It is a problem these days. Children are relatively undisciplined, so can't sit still and occupy themselves quietly.

Why is that?*

No jux its always been a problem. Small children have always found it difficult to sit still. They have never been able to stay quiet and sit still for as long as adults. You were the same when you were a small child. Trust me.

Aah it seems the non-judgemental,non-child hating and understanding mums have come out to play.How thoroughly refreshing

Hopefully they don't live near me. I prefer parents who actually, you know, parent their children.

ha ha
how long do you think toddlers can sit quietly for