Parent Teacher Consultations. Teachers too busy to contact me. AIBU?!

[WhoUpsetTheEquilibrium]

The PT C’s were two weeks ago. They put clip boards out in the morning, it’s a mad dash to get to them to write down what slot you want. This only works for the parents who aren’t at work that morning.

I’m at uni and I work and I have placements. Suffice to say, I’m rarely at the school so I miss this opportunity. Usually this isn’t a problem, I simply call the school and arrange it with the teacher.

Both teachers (two kids, primary school) offered times that I was in training or at work (I can’t get time off for a 15 minute meeting) and I offer a whole bunch of times and days that I can do. They call back (via the woman in the office) and offer a time I’m at work. Helpful.

Nothing since. I’ve called three times and left messages.
I call this morning about it and about my son being in hysterics again about a maths thing. I mention that no one has contacted me yet and got “Yes that’s becuase they are extremely busy.”
Well them and us both! She sounded pissed off.
AIBU?! I’m getting pissed off now.

BTW your lucky to get to pick. Dc school allocated a time and if you can't make it then tough

OP - you don’t sound like a very nice person. Maybe this is why the teachers aren’t bending over to accommodate you.

Why should the teachers meet you outside their paid hours? Parents evening appointments are included in teachers hours, if your child is important to you then you should make arrangements and come to them.

I offered any time between 8am and 4pm on wednesdays and Thursdays. Or after 4.30 on all the other days.
That’s a pretty broad spectrum.

It does seem like a pretty broad spectrum, but as a teacher I teach (aka look after your child) between 8 and 4, including duties and clubs.
I need to rush home at 4.30 and, per school rules, can not call you from my private phone.

It seems silly, doesn’t it? That’s the way it is, though. Please write a detailed email to your teacher. We can usually email from home via the school server much easier than chasing parents up over the phone.
We’re all busy.

Fattymcfaterson

Bollox to this, the OP has offered multiple times when she is available. The teachers should really be more flexible.

hahahahahahaha.

Their booking system sounds nuts. So many schools just won't recognise that most mums now work. Ask for a phone slot if face to face won't work. It's not unreasonable for a teacher to do that at 4.30 or 5pm. I would have done that when I was a teacher.

But she is busy, OP. She really is. A primary teacher will barely pause for breath 8am-4pm. How is it her fault that you weren't there for the appointment sign-up?

. It's not unreasonable for a teacher to do that at 4.30 or 5pm. I would have done that when I was a teacher.

Of course it's unreasonable. By 4.30pm I have my own childcare responsibilities. I don't care what others do.

In my experience, you really have to schedule around them. Is there a co-parent or grandparents who can go?

No reason to get so angry, many of us work, you just have to take time out or miss it. Hysterics over maths is perhaps something you can solve at home at this level.

As a teacher, I think you have offered a reasonable range of times. However you may have to have time off work sometimes for parents' evenings -I do.

I had a parebts who could 'only meet after 6 30pm' and this was outside the normal parents' evening (when that time would obviously be fine). Er, no!

As a teacher you sound like a nightmare! Parent evening are set up for a reason to avoid this! We’ve just done ours and I’ve had parents who can’t make it. I stay late on parents eve and sacrifice family time for them therefore if you can’t make parents evening then I only offer time that works for me.

I’m a parent too and when my DD has parents evening I make sure i attend on that day; even if it means cancelling or missing something.

So the teacher isn't seeing these kids out the door every day and seriously couldn't manage just 10 minutes.

Teachers at my very demanding school do tutoring and frequently speak to parents before and after school most weeks.What happens if there is an incident or important personal info parents need to relay? A once a year parents evening is pretty high up on the priority list particularly when there are issues that need dealing with

Toomanytealights

But not so high up that the parent could prioritise it?

A uni course with placements is a whole diff kettle of fish to taking holiday. Plenty of parents have jobs with shifts or crucial projects and will sometimes not be able to just arrange time off work on a particular day.

Toomanytealights

Sorry, but if you can't prioritise your child's education on one night a year, okay, that's your issue, but don't expect me to make time twice.

I am lucky that my current school lets me take time off for parents evening,my dp can't if he has a project going live. He attends most but if it clashes at a particular time he just can't. Uni placements ime are just as inflexible,coursework relies on particular experience being done at a certain time.

Ime there are very few primary night time slots. Most are in the working day with a few in the run up to 7 which go very quick. If you're not doing the school run you have very little chance of getting one.

Toomanytealights

Respectfully, that's your problem. My childcare commitments aren't flexible either, so why should I be hanging about to make calls outside my working hours, because someone else 'can't request time off? I've yet to hear of a uni course where you can't take an evening off for an annual family commitment.

It depends where placements are and it's not me that has the issue. I've never missed a parents evening but I've always had supportive flexible schools as a work place and a supportive partner. Not everybody has that luxury.

You pick your kids up at 3.30 every day do you?

Toomanytealights

When I pick my kids up is precisely none of your business. But if I'm not available, and not being paid, that's tough apples. The parent will have an information deficit, but not one of my making.

For most people 3.30 - 6.00 isn't an evening it's the working day and a commute.

Wow a little bit of empathy wouldn't go amiss. I don't know any teachers who wouldn't listen,sympathise and do their absolute best to fit in a mutually convenient 10 minutes.

Toomanytealights

Yep, my best is what I will do. But that doesn't include times when I'm not available.

My dd's school runs an online system for parents evening and all parents are told when the website will go live for you to book an appointment. Parents evening runs from 4-7pm on 2 different days, which is really helpful. This is much better than the clipboard system that existed at dd's nursery.

You can’t give up a second of the time you’re busy or working so how can they? There are times set up that you can’t make, what else is she supposed to do? Wait until she has time to ring you!

Teacher here.
The booking system sounds like a nightmare.

However you seem to have this double standard where your course and hours are too important to be interrupted for a 10 minute phonecall, whilst expecting teachers to find time in their job to cater to you and arrange meetings/calls outside their hours to suit.

I should add, I have no issue with a quick 10 min call but it would be done on the first day convenient around other elements of my job. It would really get my back up if someone chose not to attend parents' evening and then was arsey over being contacted when it suited them. Good will goes both ways.