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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think they should have told me they’d taken it?

306 replies

Maybellissimo · 14/03/2018 17:12

My best friend died of stomach cancer 5 years ago and left me a few of her possessions, one of which being a Victorian plant stand. A few months ago I decided to get it French polished so I arranged for a friend to come and collect it on a Friday morning. He was stuck in traffic so he told me to leave it on my driveway as he was only 5 mins away and I had to leave for work. I left it behind the wheelie bins it was partially obscured but you would have to move the bin to get to it. I got to work and found a message on my phone from my friend saying that the stand wasn’t there. I was really upset and cross with myself for leaving it outside but I accepted the fact it had gone but felt really sad due to the sentimental value attached to it. We had a loft conversion done and i went up to have a look and we have a good view of our neighbours garden. I was shocked to see my plant stand in their garden, painted black and with a new top nailed to it. I showed my husband and he said leave it don’t say anything but AIBU yo knock on their door and have a go at them for not asking me if they could have it?

OP posts:
bimbobaggins · 14/03/2018 18:51

You should have done what I said. Unfortunately can’t do that now but not sure what else you can do

Original poster
Maybellissimo · 14/03/2018 18:51

If I jump over their fence and take it back that is also theft though?

OP posts:
Angrybird345 · 14/03/2018 18:55

Threaten them with police and small claims court,

pimlicolife · 14/03/2018 18:55

They've done nothing wrong! As far as anyone else is concerned you literally left this out with the rubbish. It's unfortunate but it clearly wasn't a good idea to leave it out where you did.

Avasarala · 14/03/2018 18:55

If it's actually there's and you are wrong, and they can prove it, then it's theft. But if you know it's yours, they are not going to call the police on you since they'd be found out to have stolen it in the first place.

N2986 · 14/03/2018 18:55

Yeah there's no way I'd let them keep it!

Avasarala · 14/03/2018 18:56

And trespass is a civil matter, so police wouldn't bother about you going in their garden.

InsomniacAnonymous · 14/03/2018 18:56

It's far too valuable to let it drop, both in monetary and sentimental terms. Have you any photos of it and/or proof of ownership. was it left to you in your friend's will with full description or was it bequeathed informally?

capricorn12 · 14/03/2018 18:58

A couple of years ago someone stole a heavy planter full of pansies from my front garden. They would have had to come into my garden to get it and it weighed a tonne so would not have been easy to run off with. A few days later I was walking to my sons school to pick him up and spotted the planter on someones doorstep just round the corner from my house! Defo the same one as unusual colour and same flowers, I couldn't believe the nerve of them. I just marched up, picked it up and walked off with it (though i was momentarily tempted to put it through their front window). Get it back OP, some people are cheeky f*ers.

Butterball17 · 14/03/2018 19:03

I think it’s theft and have reported a scrap man for theft after they took a trampoline frame from the end of my drive by bins which were kept there and hadn’t been put out.... the police agreed it was theft and told me that if anyone took anything from your property ( including the garden ) then it’s a crime.......

Avasarala · 14/03/2018 19:04

It doesn't matter where you had placed it - so the people saying you put it near your bin so it's your fault are talking bollocks. I keep my bins at the side of my house, and along that wall I have lots of decorative planters - some even beside the bins, with no flowers given the time of year. Are they fair game to anyone walking past? No! And neither was the OP's antique. Just go take it as soon as you get an opportunity. If you're wrong and they can prove it, and the police turn up, they'll listen to your side and there's no way they'd waste more time on it after hearing you as long as you give it back. But, let's be fair... you're not wrong!

HiggeldyPigsinblankets · 14/03/2018 19:08

what ever the situation I would not have left something that had so much sentimental value and actual value outside by my bins

Louiselouie0890 · 14/03/2018 19:09

Any update

Figgygal · 14/03/2018 19:12

Threaten with police definitely cheeky fuckers!!

chequeplease · 14/03/2018 19:12

Sorry to read your update Sad

Funnyface1 · 14/03/2018 19:14

I don't think it matters that it was by the bin. I have things in my garden near the bins, it doesn't mean they are rubbish.

Especially upsetting due to the sentimental value. I really hope you can get it back. Maybe ask the police on what your options are?

Yumyumpigs · 14/03/2018 19:16

Crikey id definitely steal in back. Cheeky fuckers

flumpybear · 14/03/2018 19:19

I'd ring non emergency and ask them
To get proof - I'd be really pissed off

CPtart · 14/03/2018 19:19

Steal it back, keep it inside your house and deny all knowledge.

CatchingBabies · 14/03/2018 19:20

Go round again. Explain that you will be able to prove if it is yours or not by looking at it and if they will not allow this you will be contacting the police as it was effectively stolen.

And after that attitude I would definitely be billing them for the cost of restoration!

LavenderH · 14/03/2018 19:23

Their reaction just shows they knew it was wrong to nip into your garden and pinch it when you went out, if I were you I'd do the same. But it's probably more sensible to just go to the local police station and see if they can get involved.

SharronNeedles · 14/03/2018 19:24

I agree with telling them you have a witness and you will go to the police if they do not return it and foot the bill for having it restored

PistFump · 14/03/2018 19:25

They're bang out of order OP. Did you explain it had sentimental value? I wouldn't want it back now they've ruined it, but I would want them to know how bad their behaviour is.

Ladybirdbookworm · 14/03/2018 19:28

I'm Shock for you
That's so wrong
Hope they have a change of mind or failing that .....it just disappears...........

nonfatnofoamlatte · 14/03/2018 19:30

I'm surprised they lied about it - most probably because they knew it wasn't being thrown out. I would take it back when they're gone and have my friend there to take it away to be restored.

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