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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think they should have told me they’d taken it?

306 replies

Maybellissimo · 14/03/2018 17:12

My best friend died of stomach cancer 5 years ago and left me a few of her possessions, one of which being a Victorian plant stand. A few months ago I decided to get it French polished so I arranged for a friend to come and collect it on a Friday morning. He was stuck in traffic so he told me to leave it on my driveway as he was only 5 mins away and I had to leave for work. I left it behind the wheelie bins it was partially obscured but you would have to move the bin to get to it. I got to work and found a message on my phone from my friend saying that the stand wasn’t there. I was really upset and cross with myself for leaving it outside but I accepted the fact it had gone but felt really sad due to the sentimental value attached to it. We had a loft conversion done and i went up to have a look and we have a good view of our neighbours garden. I was shocked to see my plant stand in their garden, painted black and with a new top nailed to it. I showed my husband and he said leave it don’t say anything but AIBU yo knock on their door and have a go at them for not asking me if they could have it?

OP posts:
OutyMcOutface · 14/03/2018 18:04

They went onto your property and removed your property from it and didn’t even double check before painting the bloody thing. You absolutely must go ask for it back and be sure to mention that they have ruined a £500 antique and a keepsake of dear friend of yours. They really should have double checked this is was rubbish before defacing it.

MiniEggMeister · 14/03/2018 18:04

They took it off your property. It's theft. End of.

PositivelyPERF · 14/03/2018 18:07

Tell them you didn’t realise they had taken it until you checked your security cameras, or you would have been straight round. The cheeky fuckers paired it to make it look like a different one. I bet they deny that it’s yours.

combatbarbie · 14/03/2018 18:09

Round here if it's left at the end of your drive, it's a free for all as we have loads of charity collection bags etc posted every week and the old guy that goes round the streets looking for metal in his van....saves a trip to the tip when white goods go up the swanny.

If it was ON the drive by your bins then it's theft??

combatbarbie · 14/03/2018 18:11

Their excuse will be but we thought it was rubbish as it was by the bins but come on....most council's will refuse to lift bins if the lids aren't closed let alone take rubbish at the side of it.....and assuming it wasn't bin day either or else your bins would have been on the street!

OneStepSideways · 14/03/2018 18:14

They probably thought it was being thrown out and they were rescuing it! I would go round and (politely) explain. Then get it restored. I think you'll have to pay the cost of restoring it though. Leaving it outside was a bit silly, anyone could have taken it.

diddl · 14/03/2018 18:14

"Their excuse will be but we thought it was rubbish "

I agree-so Op tells them that they are wrong.

As a pp put though-they might deny insist that it's theirs.

combatbarbie · 14/03/2018 18:18

Is there any sort of marking on the underside that you could use to identify it when they say they bought it a flea market coincidentally the same day yours went missing?

Avasarala · 14/03/2018 18:18

It's an expensive antique. OP will have records since she inherited it. They took it from her property; she could have sat it outside as she was planning to use it for her own plants or any other reason so they should not have taken it. She can involve the police if she chooses too - they may not do anything but it has value so if it's not a high crime area, she could get lucky and someone might pop by.

Obviously, that's not a course of action you'd want to take but she's not without options if they try to claim it's theirs. They won't be able to produce a receipt so they'd be screwed on that.

whathaveiforgottentoday · 14/03/2018 18:20

I would be fuming. Who takes something without double checking first?

lorelairoryemily · 14/03/2018 18:25

Definitely go and tell them it's yours and you want it back. People are incredible

bimbobaggins · 14/03/2018 18:28

Why don’t you wait until they are out, go round and take it back

Butterymuffin · 14/03/2018 18:30

Don't tell them its value. Tell them (truthfully) why it was there and that it has sentimental value for you. Say you understand they thought it was fair game (cross your fingers for that bit) but it wasn't and it means a lot to you.

PeapodBurgundy · 14/03/2018 18:30

OOOh yes, what bimbo said!

flumpybear · 14/03/2018 18:44

Just pop round and tell them what happened - it's bad that they just took it - at least take it then check first before you modify it in case the bin men take in the meantime

It's sentimental value and you'll be really pissed off if you don't

LemonysSnicket · 14/03/2018 18:45

Wow I’d be raging, they could’ve taken it and then asked if it was okay.

Original poster
Maybellissimo · 14/03/2018 18:48

I’ve just been round. They are denying it’s mine. They said they were given it by a friend. I asked to look at it and they refused to let me in. Now what?

OP posts:
AintNobodyHereButUsChickens · 14/03/2018 18:48

Knock on the door and ask for it back!!

Original poster
Maybellissimo · 14/03/2018 18:49

I know it’s mine, it is too coincidental that they have been given exactly the same stand.

OP posts:
Oysterbabe · 14/03/2018 18:49

It's a misunderstanding. Round here people leave stuff outside their houses all the time and it means take it if you want it. I can see why they might have though that if it was by the bin.

Original poster
Maybellissimo · 14/03/2018 18:49

Albeit they’ve painted it black and nailed a different top to it

OP posts:
AnnaleeP · 14/03/2018 18:50

Next time they're out just steal it back.

bettyboo40 · 14/03/2018 18:50

Call their bluff. Say another neighbour saw them and mentioned it to you. That is so cheeky of them!

TacoFlavouredKisses · 14/03/2018 18:50

Police. The arseholes.

Avasarala · 14/03/2018 18:51

Given the value, you could make a police report. Really not sure if they'd do anything- depends on the force. If the police to come round, they'd need to provide evidence of the friend. If you want to take it that far?

There's no much else you can do but go back round and keep asking.