AIBU About Constant Requests To Babysit?

[zukiecat]

I'll try and keep this short and not let it turn into a rant, but please bear with me!

Since the start of the year a colleague has asked me constantly to babysit her four DC, some of which has been for nights out and some so her DH can work overtime (voluntary)

Looking back on my diary I have done more than 50 hours of babysitting since the middle of January, I have health issues and it's really starting to take its toll on me, I have Pernicious Anaemia (amongst other conditions) and sometimes coping with my part time job is more than enough for me, I don't ask for or receive any sort of payment for this babysitting, last week I got a bit pissed of because I looked after the DC for the whole day, then had to go straight to work for an evening shift, it was pouring rain when I left but I didn't get offered a lift to work, I should say I never ever ask for or expect any lifts from anyone to anywhere, but seeing as though I had looked after her DC from 9am to 5pm and it would have taken her DH five minutes to run me down the road, I have Sciatica and Arthritis which are made worse by cold damp weather.

Colleague also asked our boss not to put me on the rota on certain evenings because, and I quote "I need her to babysit"

My own DC are adults, one DD has left home and the younger one also has health issues and she's had nine hospital admissions since June 2017, she was also diagnosed this weekend with a blood clot on her lung which is very worrying, so I need to be around to look after her too.

I had a bad dose of flu in January, but colleague's DH wouldn't stop phoning and texting me to ask if I would be able to babysit that week so that they could have a night out. I also had quite severe laryngitis three weeks ago, and this, combined with my other health conditions really took it out of me, but I still got endless texts asking me to babysit for another night out.

I'm just feeling exhausted and to be honest, just used. I'm not the best at saying No to people and some do take advantage of that, but do you think I would be justified to refuse to do any more babysitting and not give a reason?

Sorry, this was longer than I intended it to be, but thanks for reading!

Good on you, what a CF, her childcare is not your problem. So what how much her husband will loose, you are not her free childcare service, what's in it for you. I would tell HR the situation and not to discuss your hours with her. The more you stand up to her, the better you feel. She would never do the same for you.

Yay, good for you standing up for you! Don't let anything she says weaken your resolve! Bet you feel like Wonder Woman now! 👍🏻

Just say, yes I will babysit, it's £14ph, I'll send you an invoice for previous babysitting.

Yes so what if her DH looses out, they are their kids, it's called making sacrifices.

I am just at the cheek of this woman!

Well done OP 👏

I am just at the cheek of this woman!

Well done OP 👏

God, she’s an incredibly cf!!

Sorry phones playing up

Good for you, Zukie!

She really is ‘having a larf ‘, isn’t she! So entitled and very rude! I’m so glad you’ve stood up to her. She needs to hear what you are saying to her. Stay strong and come back to this 5read if you ever feel yourself wavering. And most importantly, I hope your little girl is ok x

Hurrah, bravo zukie and the power of the MN Massif! Great work standing up to CF colleague.

Yay! Well done . The vipers are proud of you!

zukie, I salute you! Bravo! Stick to your guns. What a fucking cheek she has, to dare to alter YOUR hours. Always remember, every minute she expects you to sit for her is money that can be had for you and your daughter. She's an entitled twat! DO speak to your boss about your hours alone and tell her, 'I am not CF's babysitter. I have told her NO. She has been using me for unpaid childcare. I have myself and a daughter to support. I need to work for this.'

FIVE HUNDRED POUNDS! Fucking hell. You could do so much with that.

No more, just no more.

You do yourself and your daughter proud, zukie. And it's good to see you back .

Don't bother even offering to do it for her for money, she will not pay you because she thinks she is entitled to your time, time you could be spending at work or with your daughter. Fuck her!

So she's using you to save her money, what's in it for you, nothing. £500 in potential earnings, that yiu saved her, is a lot. Think of that, before you cave in. What has she ever done for you? Nothing. Left yiu to walk in the rain, whilst her husband dropped her to work. Think of that, when you feel yourself caving in. If you were not a well known and long time poster, I woukd think that this is made up, nobody could ever be that entitled and cheeky.

Thankyou everyone for your lovely words and messages, they really mean a lot to me, I can't tel you how much they mean, I've always had fantastic support and help on here.

I have a day off tomorrow but I'll be going in to see the boss and put a few things straight with her,

The more I think about it, the more I realise just how much I've just been used by the CF, and if anyone had asked me what they would do in my situation I'd be telling them exactly what you've all said to me!

Put it in writing as well so there's evidence if the cf tries it on again with you or anyone else. Send an email to your boss copying in HR reiterating the fact that your schedule is to be discussed only with you and not your colleague.

Just caught up with this and absolutely delighted you've dealt with them so firmly now -you're a star! Can't believe the cheek of them. Fingers crossed for your DD now too

There isn't really an HR Dept where I work, well there is, but only in head office which is in a different town, I work in a small supermarket so there's only the shop assistants, supervisors (CF is one, and don't we know it) then the shop manager, who is the one CF has been telling not to give me certain days ( we work on a rota, different days every week)

But I will be having a word tomorrow with the manager as she's the one who does the rotas, and be making it very clear that she must only discuss my hours with me

Wow, I am staggered by the fact that she not only thought all of that babysitting was acceptable but has been off with you since you have refused. I just don’t get how some people can be so entitled but well done for refusing.

I hope your DD is ok.

Good for you Zukie I would also let the mansger know about why she has been dictating what shifts you do. I.e. the unpaid babysitting in case she tries to make things akward for you. Would be good to put it in writing to manager and HR and preampt her so to speak.

FFS, if her DH earns so much then they can definitely pay for childcare!

Well done for sticking up for yourself OP. You'll soon see what kind of a "friend" this woman is. If you ever need a reminder, watch this TED talk.

She is a supervisor? Therefore in a position of power over you? That is incredibly illegal for her to be demanding this of you. Save all the emails and texts of her asking this of you.