Tight friends taking my tip to cover their meal costs

[alid117]

Just been out for a meal with group of friends & some of their friends for a shared birthday. Lovely evening all agreed at start just to pay for what we have to eat and drink as some driving and some not - quite organised. Four out of the 14 of us worked out our share plus £5 tip added on each (great service from staff) then pasted on the receipt down to next lot. At the end heard one of the girls go to the waiter ‘sorry it’s not a huge tip’ and when asked how much had they left was told just £6!!! WTF!!! I was literally gagged by friend who didn’t want a scene...CF alert!

Blue so you made everyone else pay for this woman meal without them knowing? That's not ok...

They all pad about 50p and earned multiples of her salary. It was a lot more OK than her paying for their three courses and several bottles of wine.

That’s stealing! It’s not about whether they want to tip or not - they’ve taken your tip money to pay for their meal.

I would not be going out with them again. And if I was feeling brave enough I would have words.

On the US waiting staff discussion - I did some casual waitressing work in the US a number of years ago. It was only for tips - there was no basic wage. What was even worse was that the management looked at your total sales, and then billed you a percentage of your sales to pay for the bar staff, the kitchen staff and the bar backs (the people who changed kegs etc), regardless of the actual amount of tips you earned.

Basically they had a complete business where they didn't pay any of their staff - the waiting staff paid for all the others out of a percentage of their tips. By the time I would pay a taxi home at night (and tip the driver) I hadn't made any money at all, for a lot of very hard work.

@Bluelady you did the right thing. They were happy for her to subsidise them, so turnabout is fair play.

A ‘friend’ did this when we were out in a large group for a Christmas meal.

10 couples, £20 per head meal and we all agreed to put £5 per couple in as a tip - you had to buy drinks at the bar so we all paid for our own

One of the couples were heard talking about their cheap night out when walking back to our cars - they’d not put in any money at all.

They got frog marched back into the restaurant and no one has ever been out with them for a meal since

They got frog marched back into the restaurant and no one has ever been out with them for a meal since

Ellybellyboo You had no right to “frog march” them back to the restaurant. If they didn’t want to tip, they didn’t have to; they paid for their share of the meal eaten which is all they owed.

If you’d tried that with me I would have told you where to go and never gone out with you again.

Disgraceful and controlling behaviour on your part, attempting to dictate what other people do with their money. It’s equally as bad as someone taking the OPs tip money and using it for other purposes.

As I said, they had put no money it at all.

They didn’t have to tip, but they needed to pay their £40, not use our tips

WhatToDoAboutThis I think you have misread - Ellie explained that they hadn't put in any money at all - they had funded their meal with the other couples' tips.

X post

"they’d not put in any money at all."
This is the key line

Xxx xx post :)

Ellybellyboo I read it, I just took no money at all to mean in regards to the tips only.

If they didn’t pay for their meals then yes, fair enough, they should have gone back to pay for them (tip excluded if they so chose).

But it is not commonly known and it isn’t the reason people don’t tip them.

The reason they dont tip them is because there is nothing to tip for! You go to a counter, pay for and collect what you want and leave again. Table service is completely different to that and more personal and thats why most people are happy to tip.

Carers face a much harder job than waiters ever would, yet nobody ever thinks to tip them.

Do you think that if everyone suddenly stopped tipping servers then their wages would go up? Or carers would suddenly be thrilled with their basic NMW? I dont understand the logic of not giving to one person on a low wage simply because you cant give to someone else. That just means 2 people lose out instead of one!

If you receive service in a restaurant you tip. That's the way it is. The fact other jobs are low paid and don't get tipped is irrelevant. Not tipping is mannerless and your dining companions will think so but will probably be too polite to say.

As for stealing other people's tips to pay for your own meal - well that's just theft.

If you receive service in a restaurant you tip. That's the way it is. ... Not tipping is mannerless and your dining companions will think so but will probably be too polite to say.

KERALA1 Nope, it really isn’t the way it is. We live in a civilised country where tips aren’t required to make up your wage.

You receive service in a fast food restaurant, but you don’t tip there. Consider yourself mannerless, do you? Or just a hypocrite?

Yes it is the way it is. Which is why many restaurants add a service charge. Most of us tip, if other people want to be mean that's up to them.

you do seem rather invested in not tipping or in other words - tight.

Most people who eat in restaurants where they receive service tip. If you don't receive waiter service you don't tip. If I ate out with you and you refused to tip and gave a barrage of reasons as to why you didn't I would think you were abit odd.

The reason they dont tip them is because there is nothing to tip for! You go to a counter, pay for and collect what you want and leave again. Table service is completely different to that and more personal and thats why most people are happy to tip.

PyongyangKipperbang Firstly, all EOTF McDonalds offer Table Service (and every McDonalds in the UK will be EOTF soon), and secondly, you don’t think friendly, fast service from employees in a long, hard job that spend hours training and where they regularly go out of their way for you deserves tipping?

Yeah, okay. We’ll just chuck the food on a tray or in a bag and lob it across the lobby then, because there’s nothing worth tipping so it doesn’t matter.

Do you think that if everyone suddenly stopped tipping servers then their wages would go up?

If you tip one NMW sector over another for no other reason than “that’s the way it is”, you are a hypocrite.

Right...ok. Think you living in a slightly different world to everyone else!

Lots of things don't stand up to examination. Why are footballers paid more than nurses etc? In our society it has evolved that when you eat out you tip the waiter. Yes, you don't tip the checkout lady or the fast food server but you do tip the waiter.

We live in a civilised country where tips aren’t required to make up your wage.

We also live in a civilised country where tips are considered a nice thing to do to acknowledge the level of service you received. And why do you keep asking people if they tip in fast food joints when they dont offfer table service and wouldnt be allowed to keep tips either way?! If you dont like the fact that no one tips you then work in a hotel or restaurant. With your experience I am sure you would find a job in one easily, and your colleagues would be happy to receive your share of the tips if you were to refuse them :)

There are often receptacles for tips in coffee shops ...

Firstly, all EOTF McDonalds offer Table Service (and every McDonalds in the UK will be EOTF soon)

I know. Will they be able to accept tips?

If you receive service in a restaurant you tip. That's the way it is

No, it really isn't. Not in the UK.

Most of us tip, if other people want to be mean that's up to them.

UK - NO, you don't tip unless you want to. Or live in London.
People really,really don't care whether you do or not otherwise.
People aren't mean just because they don't subscribe to your way of thinking.