To think this is a weird message from colleague?

[Octaviaeight]

New colleague sat next to me for about a month (she's been in the company a year but just moved to my department).

She messaged me on Facebook last night and said just letting you know that I was in a car crash last night.

I wasn't at work this week and I won't be next week either so wouldn't have noticed her missing.

I'm not her manager, her absence doesn't need to be reported to me at all.

Obviously I asked how she was but I'm not a close friend of hers. We've never socialised.

She has a boyfriend and lots of family so she's not lonely.

Is that an odd message to send?

So if I messaged you on Facebook about work tomorrow, that's a problem, but if I rock up to your front door, that's totally cool?

No, I don’t answer the door unless it’s an expected visitor. You can’t tell me that is odd.

If a person is far away from me then it’s obvious that it’s not something I need to be involved in. Honestly, some of you are really odd to take such an issue .

I'd be very wary she's trying to strike up a friendship and my response would be with that in mind. I wouldn't want to build a friendship with a colleague so I would not reply and next time I saw her if she said anything just brush it off with a 'oh I don't use messenger much'.

I thought this was a joke and then realised it wasn't. 🤣

She probably sent the same generic message to you and her other colleagues. Maybe it's a group message? Sometimes you can't tell until you get the 'so and so left the conversation' notifications.
It might've slipped her mind that you're off.

Do you actually have any 'expected visitors' Fission or have you blocked them all?

Fission You're winding us up right? No one behaves like that, surely!

Just love how the most insignificant things get blown wayyy out of proportion on mumsnet.
Feel quite sorry for poor misguided work colleague and really hope she hasn’t read this.
OP what were you hoping to achieve? Judging by your response, it hasn’t gone as planned....

How dare she message you without your consent!
Call 101 so they have it on file in case she does it again!
YABU!!
On second thoughts 999 and get them to send a patrol car and scramble an armed response unit!
You can't be to careful with random people on FaceBook!

Nope riding, no joke. That's exactly how I've had colleagues try start a friendship outside of work with me before. And for personal reasons I'm not open to making new friends right now.

She was probably having a quiet night getting pissed after all the drama, and started messaging people about it.

People don't seem to follow the same formalities on social media. You're not best mates but you're not a stranger.

It would be odd if she rang you up but on SM? Not so much.

I still can’t understand why OP just didn’t say that she didn’t use Facebook with work colleagues and then just didn’t accept her in the first place.

I'm truly sorry for your loss OP, from one motherless daughter to another I've read the entire thread and can't understand why people are being such cunts to you at all, I have no idea how it turned so nasty. Bunch of bullies.

You can report your own thread and get it deleted if you want to.

I have a visitor about once per year , other than my mother (would be rude to refuse her). I’m happy with that.
If other people like visitors etc then that’s fine, I’m not arguing against it

Yes Op - as you asked - YABU by both your original post and most of your subsequent posts.

Some other weird responses as well.

That's exactly how I've had colleagues try start a friendship outside of work with me before. And for personal reasons I'm not open to making new friends right now.

No?! How awful for you, imagine a work colleague being friendly! You'd better put a stop to that before you end up with... friends n stuff.

Is everyone drunk on MN tonight?

It's like a fucking coliseum here tonight. OP only asked if anyone else found it odd.

Fission - I don't know whether to laugh or cry.

RidingWindhorses The reason I'm not looking for more friends ATM is exactly because I already have my time and hands full keeling up with the ones I have and don't want to spread myself too thin while I'm having a shitty time in my personal life.

Thanks for the input though.

Weebo: a coliseum 😂 Brilliant imagery. Absolutely perfect!

I think she wanted to tell you for a bit of sympathy and for the attention she might get. I don’t think it means she’s trying to be your friend.
She’s probably an ‘oh my god hun are u ok?’ sort of person and assumes everyone else is too.
Saying that you hope she’s ok was fine. Just leave it at that.

I'd find it odd but I don't add people on my FB I'm not interested in although I understand some people add anyone and everyone.

That's exactly how I've had colleagues try start a friendship outside of work with me before. And for personal reasons I'm not open to making new friends right now.
I tend to make freinds with people I like and have something in common with. I don't have a limit on doing that if it's what we bothe want.

This thread is hilarious

SirGawain I had a bad experience last year with a colleague turned close friend who turned out to be a cow I had to cut contact with and now have to deal with the awkwardness of seeing every day at work.

I know that's rare but I'm honestly fine being cordial and pally with workmates and focusing on my real close friends outside of work!

Fine, I’m a fucking weirdo

@FissionChips So do you not have any friends then? Because if you do then if they contact you, you presumably regard it as unsolicited and so you 'block & blank' resulting in zero friends!!