Mumsnet Vs Real life.

[KungFuPandaWorksOut16]

Inspired by a comment on an active thread at the moment. The comment was along the lines of
"Only on mumsnet would you be advised this"

I've also seen it on a few threads where posters point out that only mumsnet would you be given this advice and never in real life.

So what advice/tips do you see mentioned on Mumsnet that you just don't think would be said in real life.

I'll start!
You can guarantee a poster will give the advice that OP needs to pack his bags and kick him out, on something really minor. They don't suggest being an adult and have a conversation first, it's straight away pack his bags and show him the door.

What other Mumsnet pearls of wisdom do we have?

What?! Some random person said it or did you know her?

It’s a woman I’ve spoken to at the group once or twice before as her son and my son go to the same pre-school.

Washing towels every day- do you live in a hotel?

Women's Aid have many local branches with spaces to take in people who have had tiffs with their DH over trivial issues and will be happy to do so.

That all male behaviour is a red flag/abusive.

That watching porn occasionally, makes someone a deviant porn addict that has no respect for women.

That trans people only become trans to infringe on womens rights.

Have your parents ever said or done something a bit shitty? Go no contact.
In RL I only know one person who is NC with her mum. I know lots of people with difficult parents but they all maintain some kind of relationship with them.

Ok, a laugh’s a laugh, but let’s not joke about Waitrose running out of artichoke hearts.....

Some of these are brilliant and some I've never seen on mumsnet so I shall keep my eyes peeled!

I have seen certain posters advise packing bags and kicking the partner out so they learn a lesson and it will never happen again. And it is normally over something very minor.

Mumsnet: Photo of pregnancy test, done days before a missed period: "Can you see a line?"

Love this thread

Cannot begin to understand the toilet brush angst. How on earth do you manage without one??? Actually I would rather not think about it.....

Anyone who ever shares an opinion about anything will be jumped on by someone with 'its none of your business', and accused of the cardinal sin of 'judging'. 'Judging' is what rational human beings do all the bloody time. And where better to share your anonymous judgements than on a flipping DISCUSSION BOARD!!!

Some MNers must walk about in a kind of mild coma all the time

Write a while draft email / text for the OP when they haven’t even asked for that kind of help

Marie Kondo will solve everything.

Something (usually very obvious) “is your friend” and if the poster has dared to do something other than apologise profusely for something they have “flounced”!

There's loads of stuff on here that I've heard in real life. I actually hate it when people say "people only say that on Mumsnet" as if people saying it here are making it up. I think we just all have different experiences and different circles and Mumsnet allows them to cross over each other more than they otherwise might. It's one of the things that makes it so interesting.

That in an emergency you can ask your neighbours (who you hardly know) to look after your children and they will willingly stand in, even having your children to stay overnight.

OP: "I don't love my DH anymore. I want to leave him. No-one else is involved"
MN: "Poor you OP. You have every right to leave him. Consult a lawyer and make sure he supports you financially post divorce"

OP: "My DH doesn't love me anymore. He wants to leave me. He says no-one else is involved"
MN: "He is LYING! There MUST be someone else. He has no right to just leave you. Consult a lawyer and make sure he supports you financially post divorce"

OP: "My child swears at me, kicks and spits in my face. I don't know what to do"

MN: Try love bombing. Have you read The Explosive child? It's probably a sensory problem. Tbh OP you don't sound as if you like your poor DC much and he must be picking up on that.

That there is a value in asking a random stranger how much their extension cost so they can plan despite not knowing the finish, the soil, the gradient, the style, the height, the region, the interface with the existing property, the type of heating, insulation, roof type, existing use of space, the drainage, local planning regulations......oh I could go in about this for pages and pages.....

Women are by their nature fragile and too delicate to deal with those super scary mundane matters; if someone at work seems distant/a man looks at you suggestively/your child is touched too hard when playing tag/someone puts a flyer through your letter box after 21:00, talk to HR/his boss/the headmaster/the police ASAP. Better to be fetchingly childlike than a reasonable adult

This a million times. I worry that we are handing back some hard won rights with this namby-pamby behaviour.

Also who doesn't answer their door when someone rings the bell??

Kids never having drunk anything but tap water or milk by the time they're 14.
Bra wearing for 8 weeks (the same bra).
Cosleeping until they're 10.
Using a sling for a 3 year old and 5 year old (at the same time).
Even considering taking newborns to the cinema.
An escape bag!
A stay at home mum stating they won't cook a meal/wash their partners clothes when he's at work all hours (and someone throwing in the comment 'tell him the 50's are that way' usually).
Mums who literally spend a full day playing with/cuddling their child so they don't even have time to do the breakfast dishes.
It's another world on here at times.

Also who doesn't answer their door when someone rings the bell?

Stop it they must have sensory issues/ social anxiety!

You pay your 15yo babysitter £5 an hour for unqualified supervision of a 10 year old who is asleep anyway? Why wouldn't you pay them adult living wage? Or nanny rates? Seems a bit mean to pay them less because they're a child.

Re: the laundry - I must be one of those slobs people are mentioning, because I can't fathom how people here seem to be CONSTANTLY doing laundry. We do one, or on very special occasions, two a week. Our machine must be a tardis.

Not request cash for a wedding gift. I have been to so many weddings over the past couple of years and only 1 has had a gift list, every other one has been a cash gift request.

Can the Mumsnetters who disagree with cash gifts honestly say that if they were getting married they would prefer a toaster they don’t need to a contribution to their honeymoon??

When a woman is struggling with a newborn baby and her DH is just lazing around and giving her absolutely no help or support whatsoever and generally being a selfish, useless twat.

‘He probably has male PND and needs some support’.

🙄🙄

Someone knocking on your door at 7pm? Phone the police, lock all doors and windows, put your children in the Anderson shelter and demand that your husband comes home immediately.

Your partner touches your boob and tries it on? Call Womens Aid and LTB.

Old boy down the road chats you up at the post office? Punch him in the face, call the police and go out a workshop for sexual harassment survivors.