Mumsnet Vs Real life.

[KungFuPandaWorksOut16]

Inspired by a comment on an active thread at the moment. The comment was along the lines of
"Only on mumsnet would you be advised this"

I've also seen it on a few threads where posters point out that only mumsnet would you be given this advice and never in real life.

So what advice/tips do you see mentioned on Mumsnet that you just don't think would be said in real life.

I'll start!
You can guarantee a poster will give the advice that OP needs to pack his bags and kick him out, on something really minor. They don't suggest being an adult and have a conversation first, it's straight away pack his bags and show him the door.

What other Mumsnet pearls of wisdom do we have?

@itsuaddict it's true, there are regional variations. My London friends all changed their names too but we are in our 40s. Another difference I have noticed is that in the north men don't wear wedding rings so much. When I lived in London I only knew one man who didn't (he was very happily married)

Pay off your mortgage at 50. Buy sea salt clothing

A poster once uttered these words..

'they're are many 5 year olds, just like mine, being breastfed to sleep all over the country'.

‘Can you take in ironing’?

@itsuaddict it's true, there are regional variations. My London friends all changed their names too but we are in our 40s. Another difference I have noticed is that in the north men don't wear wedding rings so much. When I lived in London I only knew one man who didn't (he was very happily married)

How far north?! I am the only women in our office - and the 40 odd others (menfolk) who come in and out, project managers and tradesmen who are married all wear their wedding rings barring 1) I know this because I am a nosy bitch!

I also don't know anyone in my circle of friends or a bit further beyond who hasn't changed her name to her husbands!

I love this thread!

Sahm will have no pension. She will be severely punished in old age for daring to have a life of slatternly child rearing.
Sahm with a partner is just thick, broke and will have no pension and die in poverty without her partner.
Irl....I know and have been all variety of sahm, wohm and nobody bats an eyelid. We just get on with life.

Question - "How often do you change your bedding? I wash my bedding every two weeks" We change our pj's every other night so we wear them twice before washing them.

MN reply - OMG! That's disgusting! I change our bed and the 4 children's beds every day. I we also change our pj's every day. People who sleep in the same pair of pj's two nights in a row are utter skanks! OMG! Can you imagine the state of the sheets when they have been on your bed for two whole weeks 🤤 All our family shower at least twice a day and we change our underwear 3 times a day....

RL - That's absolutely fine. Most people change their bedding every other week. I wear pj's 3 times before washing them. Life's too fucking short to be doing excessive amounts of laundry every day. There's no need

If you have ever felt even the slightest bit of anger, then you must have a serious anger management problem and need help asap.

Problems with your neighbours? Just move house. Now. It's that easy.

Also, everything, absolutely EVERYTHING, is "grim".

Oh yes and brexit voters are racist, bigoted, dull-witted dimwits. Probably have extra toes and look a lot like their cousins too. Possibly illiterate 🙄🙄🤣🤣🤣
Irl...probably similar to the above. Those pesky brexit voters just will not fall into line! 🤣

Everyone has mental health issues and their children have ASD, except all mnet parents also have extremely clever/gifted dc and if yours was reading Shakespeare at 3 months, well yep that's totally normal to be honest

Oh, and that no one over the age of twelve receives presents anymore, and you're a grabby bastard for daydreaming about getting a 99p card and a bunch of petrol station flowers for your birthday.

Theres no such thing as child poverty:

You can never tell a stoney-broke poster to get on a better financial footing before TTCing. Because "you'll just make it work" & "just buy second hand prams and youll be fine"!

Fabulous! This must mean no families in the UK cant afford rent or food right???

@juddyrockingcloggs Tyne and Wear. Plenty of men here do wear rings but I noticed it was less prevalent than in London. And I have a double first in being a nosey cunt so I always notice. Or as MN advice would have it "am single therefore gagging to sleep with other people's husbands"

That it is totally normal & unremarkable for a child to be reading fluently by the time they START reception, and that any parent who sends their child to school unable to read Harry Potter is borderline negligent. FFS

On one thread "aibu to say that the mum who asked if I would pick up her kids is a grabby user bitch who needs to be put in her place" All replies: "YANBU what a user"

On another simultaniously running thread "I cant afford childcare" All posters: "cant you just ask the other mums at school to have your kids so you can work? Why havent you done that? Or are you just too thick/lazy to use your initiative to get free childcare and make it work?"

That it's completely fine to go NC with your Mother in Law if she looks at you funny

That everyone has an invisible disability especially anyone who pinched the last parent and child parking space

That you should immediately change the locks if you have a slight tiff with your husband

That it's normal not to shower/every day and a strip wash is all that's needed (yuck)

That accessible toilets are only for disabled people never for people with babies/toddlers and babies/toddlers can either be held on your lap with one hand while you pull your trousers down, wee etc or they can be handed to an obliging passer by or just popped on the toilet floor.

Whenever a woman posts saying she's lonely because she has no DH or children.

MN: "You should go travelling"

"How do I make friends?"

MN: "Oh its easy just go to a class, yoga or something"

I have been to THOUSANDS of yoga classes and at the end of every single one people just leave and get on with their day, dont hang about making new BFFs

Taking a bus onto a pram is a crime on mn. You should have baby in a sling.

So true SpringHen

Or the suggestion is to try Meetup/volunteer. Now obviously these aren't bad suggestions, but there's never any acknowledgment of how hard it can be to make friends. Especially in places like London.

Ahem. I mean taking a buggy or pram onto a bus is a crime on mn. Where I live there are actually pram spaces for prams

Most of us here are guilty of confirmation bias, me included. It makes discussion with opposite viewpoints impossible, unlike in real life where everything is more nuanced.

@ TattyTShirt or the towels one that’s been ongoing today. I’ve never read so much tosh in my life 😂

When a woman is struggling with a newborn baby and her DH is just lazing around and giving her absolutely no help or support whatsoever and generally being a selfish, useless twat.

‘He probably has male PND and needs some support’.

I have never see this comment!

Oh yes & if you MUST have a buggy the absolutely only acceptable kind are umbrella fold ones that you cant fit any shopping on.

Oh yes @ tender volunteering is the answer to everything. Ive done loads of volunteerinv but thats not where I made any of my friends. You have a chat while youre there but thats it generally! If you go there "to make friends" then piss off into the sunset with said new friends, rather than to do the job noone there will like you anyway