Was DH being unreasonable?

[smileygrapefruit]

DH just walked to the shop for a few bits, got to the check out and said "Morning love, crazy weather out there!" She refused to serve him because he'd called her love. For context, we're in Yorkshire where every one calls every one love, DH calls his male friends love. This will probably divide opinion on MN but I'm wondering if it served him right or whether the lady should have served him? He had to walk as we can't get the car out due to the snow and the next shop is going to be a good 40 min walk each way!

Ahhh I wish he'd stood his ground but he was too shocked. I might go down and say the same to her and see if it gets the same response.

Well, unless he called her 'fuck face' or something, she WBU to serve him.

Unless she misheard and thought he said love you like crazy or love, you're crazy

I might go down and say the same to her and see if it gets the same response

Please do, then report back.

She is totally in the wrong county and line of work if she doesn't like being called "love". I'm from the south east originally and was the first time I heard men using it to each other (a policeman to a lorry driver) but been here 30 years now and really like it.

She's an eejit.

I might go down and say the same to her and see if it gets the same response

Please do! I'm Yorkshire born and bred and no-one I know would bat an eyelid at being called "love".

She was most definitely being unreasonable in Yorkshire. I'd be so pissed off if I was your dh, was there another staff member to serve him?

I'm getting wrapped up and going down there now. Will report back!

@scabbyabby I mean I'm a man in my twenties and regularly have women call me love in shops, supermarkets, pubs etc so I don't see how it misogyny ? Sounds like a bit of misanthropy tbh. Is it not a term of endearment ? And what would you call these women who say love ?

I can totally see him being shocked and why he didn't stand his ground, she probably made him feel such an idiot. She must not serve anyone all day long if she doesn't like being called love and chooses to work in Yorkshire

But if you do go down and say it and it DOES get the same response, you'll have to walk miles in the snow for your bits!
It's not just the north btw. Here in Cornwall it's 'my love' or my handsome or 'my lover.'

I miss Yorkshire and being called love! It's "pal" here, just not the same :(

I'm very feminist too but this is really not the same as any kind of harassment. And if she's really bothered she could politely explain she doesn't want to be called it to start with.

Why the hell did she go in to shop work
with such a nasty attitude - mind boggles.

Yorkshire here also. She is barking, he knows where to spend his money in future doesn't he?

She was most definitely being unreasonable in Yorkshire. :o

Yorkshire really needs its own "AIBUIY" topic.

I'm a shop assistant in Yorkshire and EVERYBODY calls me 'love'! Sometimes also 'darling' and 'sweetheart'. I love it!

Why the hell would I take offence at someone being friendly?

I find shop assistants in North Yorks surly in the main.

@DadTryingHisBest28 No, for me it's absolutely not a term of endearment- it's overly-friendly, patronizing and, when it comes from man, creepy. Even if it is meant to be a term of endearment.. I don't want endearment and sentiment from random people I don't know. If I'm in a shop, I'm there to buy bread, not do hear endearments.

I reply with "I'm not your love" or "Don't call me love" to anyone who calls me "love", male or female.

Tell him nearly all of us think he sounds lovely & that he’s done nothing wrong, at all.

I’ve always lived ‘down south’ (or overseas) but my family are from ‘up North’ and I LOVE being ‘up North’ & everyones ‘pet’, ‘love’ or ‘me duck’ 😊.

She’s a miserable twat. I hope she has a manager you can complain to, she had no right not to serve him, not even if it’s her shop. Stupid cow.

Massive over reaction on her part!

I’m a hardy Yorkshire woman, I hate being called “Love” when it’s used in a patronising manner... all of my patients call me love, sweetheart etc as they’re all from ex-mining communities and it’s just how they speak, it’s not said with malice at all... I don’t even bat an eyelid!

Yes I also regularly got called darling, sweetheart, and in some cases "chicken"! (As a term of endearment, not meaning you're cowardly.)

Also love it when you travel around and get "ducks", "my lover" etc. It's lovely.

And yes it is definitely multi-way, both men and women do it to everyone.

I don't want endearment and sentiment from random people I don't know.

You're not from yorkshire then...? :o

It is fair enough if that's how you feel, but then you can just tell the person. It's silly to refuse to serve someone for something that everyone does to everyone as a cultural norm and is not gender-based or malicious.

ScabbyAbby. It’s being so cheerful that keeps you going.

🤣😂🤣😂

Honestly, what a miserable outlook.

Daft bugger- there's no joy in life anymore is there?

Nope, not from Yorkshire originally but I've lived there and now live in the North East.

I did say in my first post that the woman should have served OP's DH but told him not to call her love.