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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

DSD working as a cam girl

189 replies

K1092902 · 27/02/2018 19:11

How would you feel about it?

OP posts:
MadRainbow · 28/02/2018 16:44

@crunchymint that is a sweeping generalisation with absolutely no basis in fact. Where are you getting your facts??

Sanderz · 28/02/2018 16:49

I think what's going on here crunchy is that your definition of the sex industry is only the bits that are run by criminal gangs. The rest of it isn't the real sex industry. Apologies if I'm way off the mark.

crunchymint · 28/02/2018 16:50

More than three quarters of brothels in UK have links to criminal gangs. And it is the same throughout the sex industry. Of course those who are ra ra ra empowerment about all of this, will never tell you that.

crunchymint · 28/02/2018 16:52

sanderz You are way off course there.

Sanderz · 28/02/2018 16:54

But what about the "mainstream" sex industry; the legal strip clubs, the TV channels, the legal websites and phone lines...

MadRainbow · 28/02/2018 16:57

Sanderz is much closer to the mark actually. And brothels actually are an illegal part of the industry. Web cam, escorting, modelling, and film production are a much bigger part of the industry and have almost no connection to gangland (in the country I hasen to add)

Again where are you getting your information crunchy?

crunchymint · 28/02/2018 17:01

Strip clubs and porn are also linked in most cases to criminal gangs. Assume you mean porn when you talk about film production? Escorting is prostitution in fancy clothes, and web cam is performing sex acts for strangers on the net. Yes all linked to criminal gangs.

This information is well known. I am aware it is not the case in absolutely all cases. But it is in the majority of cases.

GeorgeTheHippo · 28/02/2018 17:04

How do you feel about it OP?

It's very rude to start a thread with one line and not come back to it.

You made it up to see what people would say didn't you.

Sanderz · 28/02/2018 17:07

Yes all linked to criminal gangs.

Source?

I'm curious as to what sort of "criminal gang" would run a chain of high street strip clubs. I wonder what particular criminal activity goes hand in hand with running a chain of bars with naked women in Confused

crunchymint · 28/02/2018 17:16

Stop misquoting me, most of the sex industry is linked to criminal gangs, not all. And you are naive if you can not see why.

But keep pushing the idea women do it to get their degree at Oxford.

Sanderz · 28/02/2018 17:32

I'm not misquoting you, I literally quoted you and asked you for a source.

Look, I think the illegal sex industry is clearly exploitative. I think the legal sex industry is based on exploitation. I just don't think most of the legal sex industry in this country is run by criminal gangs, but I'm happy if you can point me to the evidence.

Cowsopinion · 28/02/2018 17:41

You have a lot of drama in your life OP.

As for how I'd feel, I'd feel disappointed.

crunchymint · 28/02/2018 17:51

Quick google shows that half of Scotland's lap dancing clubs were raided for suspected criminal activity including money laundering and human trafficking.

www.dailyrecord.co.uk/news/scottish-news/cops-launch-nationwide-lapdance-raids-4596761

And you misquoted me because I said all elements of the sex industry have links to criminal gangs. I did not say that every single brothel or lap dancing club had links to criminal gangs.

SheGotBetteDavisEyes · 28/02/2018 18:03

It's hypocritical for a start because I bet even the best feminist among us shaves their legs, wears makeup, does more than their fair share of housework or something that could be considered "part of the problem"

Feminists can wear an inch of make up every day, get their legs waxed and go home and scrub the oven all day if that's their choice.

Pokemonlovepower · 28/02/2018 18:03

If she is of legal age and is staying safe on it i.e not giving out any to personal information. Then it's not ideal but I definitely see how useful it can be especially in a time when a lot of jobs don't pay enough x

Skarossinkplunger · 28/02/2018 18:08

There are some (note, I did not say “all”
and I did not say “most”) sex workers who aren’t exploited, who make decent money and enjoy their role. I was one, but most Mumsnetters refuse to believe I exist because it’s not convenient to thier narrative.

crunchymint · 28/02/2018 18:11

I believe you made decent money. I believe that being paid for a sex act is exploitation.

Skarossinkplunger · 28/02/2018 18:19

You believe what makes you feel superior crunchymint

ClaryFray · 28/02/2018 18:21

@SheGotBetteDavisEyes

You honestly don't see anything wrong with; 'oh well, I'm seen as a sexualised commodity, better make the most out of it then.'

No when I worked as a paid submissive. I didn't think that. I thought, I enjoy this lifestyle, I could stand to make some more money. I know I'll combine the two. I meet some very interesting people. Engaged in some very fulfilling scenes, and haven't regretted it once. I realise my experience is somewhat niche, I wasn't broadcasting what I did online, beyond advertising. There was no possibility of me being recorded without my knowledge or consent and it winding up on porn sites. It was on my terms, and there was no sexual inter course.

Not all women who do this are addicted to drugs, beaten by a boyfriend or a pimp, or being exploited. Some do actually enjoy it. I think you can't say "they are all exploited oh the horror" until you've taken the time to speak to every women in the industry.

Porn can be different, I'll admit. They want more extreme and more violent scenes. But that needs more policy.

Tbh, I think if your not gonna judge the men who do (and there are a few) this as harshly then your part of the problem.

SheGotBetteDavisEyes · 28/02/2018 18:50

Tbh, I think if your not gonna judge the men who do (and there are a few) this as harshly then your part of the problem

Eh? Where have I even vaguely alluded to this? How on earth can you attribute an opinion to me and then claim that I'm 'part of the problem' for having it? Confused

ForalltheSaints · 28/02/2018 18:53

I would be upset. Anything filmed on camera can end up on the internet and come back to haunt someone. You have on occasions seen film of someone taken say ten years when younger, doing something less embarrassing.

LipstickHandbagCoffee · 28/02/2018 19:02

I’ve seen mn folk get more aerated about chores/backchat/career choices
But on this,participation in sex industry..oh uh it’s,like,her body. It’s empowering
And no I don’t think there are loads of oxbridge students lap dancing/web camming/escorts
It’s a convenient grubby myth.the happy hooker,glam,clever,at oxbridge and just loves cock

crunchymint · 28/02/2018 19:35

No I don't think I am superior. It does not make me feel superior that women are being sexually exploited. It makes me sad and angry.

Skarossinkplunger · 28/02/2018 20:10

Crunchymint What other explanation could there be for you insisting you know what happened to me better than me?

crunchymint · 28/02/2018 20:29

I am not insisting I know what happened to you better than you. I am saying all sex work for money is exploitative.
And I judge the men very harshly.

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