Peak P&C space rage!

[beepthemeep]

Argh. Just whipped DD up to the shops to get some nibbles for our guests who are arriving shortly. The spaces at this particular Waitrose are very tight and I'm very pregnant, so did need a P&C spot.

There was one left, so I headed for it. But nooo - some tool in a wannabe sports car zoomed the wrong way up the one way bit and parked in it (badly). Door opened and a young couple got out. No baby. No child. I assume no disabilities as there were several empty disabled spaces even nearer the shop.

I had to get DD out at the side of the car park and then park, as there was just no way I could do it in a normal space. The worst thing was, as I was struggling to do so, I saw them heading off... THEY WEREN'T EVEN GOING INTO FUCKING WAITROSE!!!!!

Am I wrong to wish the plague of a thousand traffic wardens upon their heads?

Obese people can just start jogging and go on a diet

I see your point, if you're too fat to get out of your car in the supermarket, drive home and stop eating. If you start getting malnourished, jog to Tescos.

Just to pick up on a small point- my dp has a ridiculously low car- believe me, if he could afford to replace it he would. He knows how much pain it causes for me to get in and out, I have a real hard time.
Also, my blue badge hasn’t come through yet, so I absolutely would have him park in a p&c space with or without kids, I need the space to get out- even if that moment I’m not on crutches, my legs could give way at any point so I would need them or help getting in and out. And to look at me, early 30s, you’d think nothing wrong.

That’s not excusing the people you saw today op

I have two children and buy food on a weekly basis, so yes I understand your post OP. I just happen to not agree with you.

Not all disablities are visible and not all disabilities qualify for a blue badge
Yesterday I discovered I'd left my bb in a friend's car. I parked in a P&C space. No alternative really.

Because all obese people are like that because they are lazy and don't exercise by choice. They NEVER have medical conditions that prevent them exercising do they? hmm
No ofcourse they don't according to mumsnet.
They never have medical conditions which make exercising difficult or impossible, they're just fat and lazy.

When possible I strategically place my trolley at their passenger door (just close enough without actually touching it) in the hope that they won’t notice and turn the wheel to reverse, thus hitting the trolley.

This says much more about you.

I would love someone to come here right now and tell me how the fuck I”m supposed to walk the length of a car park and how the fuck i’m Supposed to exercise.

I work bloody hard (office work, min wage, shifts) I try really hard never to be off sick I’ve done qualifications to get my English and maths and ECDL to try to better myself and my kids but I’m fat and lazy and cheeky as fuck and deserve my car to be damaged.

I need the extra space on a bad day. I can’t open the door wide enough in a Normal space to get out.

Bluedoglead - but you wouldn't then bound off shopping, would you?! Had I seen them struggling to get out of the car, or do anything other than bugger off into town - where I later drove past them strolling along the street at the other end to Waitrose - of course I wouldn't have been bothered by them using the space. They just took it because it was near the entrance and the car park looked pretty busy (Saturday morning shopping hell).

There's a happy medium between "how dare you assume, of course everyone must have a hidden disability that doesn't qualify for a blue badge" and being sensitive to people who do have disabilities. One doesn't negate the other.

Imo they should abolish these spaces to make room for more disabled spaces. They're more trouble than they're worth.

I absolutely agree with there being hidden disabilities - we have them! DH also has mobility issues but had his blue badge removed after the shite that that is PIP was reviewed despite still having the same difficulties.

However, I agree that not all disabilities need or qualify for a blue badge, and the same goes for hidden disabilties. BB's principle qualification is having "permanent" and "very considerable difficulty in walking", including sight problems. Allowing for some day to day fluctuation.

I think it is entirely possible to be able to identify that two young people looking fit and well and moving freely, idependently and with vigour, do not have the problem (on that day) of having very considerable difficulty in walking and so whatever disabilities they might have (hidden or otherwise) on this day it did not qualify them to mis-use a P&C space. If they had a BB then they should have used it.

Neither of us move ever move with gay abandon, leap easily out of cars, or would be described as 'swanning'!!

That said, the relative narrowness of parking spaces is a huge problem and even with our tiny and narrow car, we find it difficult to get in and out, esp DH and, especially now we can't use BB spaces.

But saying 'oh but hidden disabilties..' to challenge any comment just gives selfish tossers the ability to take the piss unchallenged and helps none of us less-able people.

Lycoperdun - you have summed up EXACTLY how I feel about it!

MN is weird, it's the only place where wanting a P&C space is sneered at. And the same old "not disabilities are visible" argument is pointless when actually most some people who p&c spaces with no kids arent disabled, just nob heads.

OP YANBU, the chances are these people were dicks.

It’s not even as simple as “ok on that day” though they could appear fine when leaving the car but by the end of shopping have nothing left in the tank.

The simple thing is if a space is free use it, if not park elsewhere. It’s nothing to do with you who has parked where as long as they are parked legally (p and c are not legally enforacable)

Sirzy - so nobody should show any consideration for people who might have a greater for something than they do?

Got it

Of course people should show consideration but that works both ways and confronting someone isn’t considerate of their potential needs.

Lots of people have much greater needs than parents with children strangely and contrary to what people like to believe that can’t be judged by looking at someone

But saying 'oh but hidden disabilties..' to challenge any comment just gives selfish tossers the ability to take the piss unchallenged and helps none of us less-able people.

But not challenging them gives means people confront people like me which has in the past left me in tears.

Perhaps I should go around with my disabilities tattooed on my forehead (not that there would be enough room to list them all)

Someone being pregnant and having a baby will end. That condition will end. The pregnancy will all being well end in a baby and that baby will grow to be an adult. Who won’t need extra space in car parks or any other reasonable adjustments.

I will always have bad days and they are getting more frequent and worse.

That's not the same as considerable difficulty in walking, and it entirely depends on how long and far the shopping trip is.

And I really, really I do know how that feels believe me. I ahrdly ever go for that reason. But there are people who need the BB spaces more than me who can walk less or need space to manouvre eqiuipment, and pregnant women and people with car seats need more space to open doors if only to stop them denting my car!

The point here is that the OP correctly identified 2 people that were mis-using the space (they were still walking about town some time ater) and complained about their selfishness. It OK for her to make a specific complaint about her experience. She wasnt generalising.

She doesn’t know what disabilities they may or may not have had.

How do you know she correctly identitied they didn’t need it? If you both have some sort of magical abilities to tell then please do let the nhs know as it could save them a fortune!

For once I'm in agreement with @PigletWasPoohsFriend 😂
I've been there too, it's shit and very upsetting

piglet I am truly, truly sorry that some people get it wrong and challenge you wrongly even with a BB. We have had that too and its not nice.

I guess what is really hard (in all aspects of life) is it to get people to use their educated judgement or empathy. Lots of people are all one way or the other, and my experience is that not many people have honed their ability to fully think and weigh things up before making up their minds.

However, I dont think this this is what the OP was doing and the situation she described was pretty clear cut.

I might 'bound out of a car' and be perfectly fine for half an hour but as i become exhausted and my painkillers stop being effective i become stiff, slower and in agony every step. Yet this country still hasnt recognised fibro as something youd get a bb for. After my trip around town to get me up and about then its time to do the shopping where i can lean on the trolley. By the end of that i can just about stumble to the p&b spots. Fair enough i do tend to have my 10 yeard with me so rarely do i get crap for not having a baby (my local asda p&b goes up to 12) but i havnt got a bb but i still need to be closer to the entrance so when im done i can get to the car safely.

But if they can walk around town with all the hallmarks of good walking ability - speed, independence, freedom of movement, distance walked etc etc then you really can say whether people have a disability that on that day required them to need to be closer to a shop that they werent even using. (and they were not obese so they did not need the space that a P&C gives!)

How is that wrong? Even disability has a spectrum of impairment.

When we had the BB we did not always use it - if there was a space very close by we would ususally use it (if no prohibitively narrow and we did not need the time limit or payment requirments) as some disabled people need the extra width that a BB space gives, even more than DH needed to save 2 metres.

should say if *if there was a nonBB space nearby

There was a photo posted in one of my local FB groups showing some dickweed who had parked over the line between 2 parking spaces, blocking them both. Most people were indignant, as you'd expect - but some UTTER tosser came on the thread and said that it's what HE would do to avoid having his car paint scratched. He "paid a lot of money" for his car and "was within his rights" to keep it safe by parking over 2 bays in that way. He's also the sort of fucker who would take a wide space, just to keep his car safe from others.
One such also parked in a parent & buggy space - no child, no need, except you could tell his car was his pride and joy. Wanker.