DH Smells

[islarose1110]

This is very personal and I've NC because I'm so embarrassed. As the title says, my DH smells. He will only shower every 2-3 weeks sometimes longer. I've tried everything, tried to be kind when I speak to him, buying him nice smellies, being blunt ... but he never seems to catch on. So tonight, he's gone off in a huff because I told him he smelt and needed a shower. I absolutely hate hurting his feelings but don't know what else I could have done. I can only assume that his colleagues must notice and I hate to think what they must think. I cannot understand why he's happy to let himself get like this. I do love him but hate this. AIBU to think this is a problem?

[Kittykat93]

Jesus Christ I hope you don't have to share a bed with him! I can't imagine what I'd smell like if I went three weeks without washing !

[expatinscotland]

Has he always been like this? Can't get my head round wanting to date a person who doesn't wash.

[Shoxfordian]

Was he like this when you married him?

[Vitalogy]

I'm not sure if there can be any way forward if he's point blank refusing. Sex or even sharing the same room would have to be off the menu. Must be difficult even being in the same house.

[Eliza9917]

Does he have a sink wash but only actually gets in the shower every 2-3 weeks?

[brownelephant]

yanbu
bet he's known as the smelly one in his office.
he needs to wash more often.
maybe have a bath if a shower feels like too much a shore. or vice versa

[Jdabbers]

Has he given any reason why he's adverse to showering?

[Rosiie]

Do you sleep with him when he hasn't showered in weeks?

[MammaAgata]

I read that as every 2-3 days which I thought was rank but every 2-3 weeks?!!! God, I wouldn’t last 5 mins with someone like that. Or even someone who didn’t wash every other day. Surely this isn’t a new thing? What on earth does he do for a living? I can’t imagine in any kind of paid work managers or colleagues would tolerate the smell..

[brizzledrizzle]

Yes, it's a problem. Why does he say he only showers every couple of weeks? Is he depressed?

[MammaAgata]

What I’m intrigued to know is what triggers him to shower once the two weeks are up? It can’t be the smell because he’d be reeking for at least 13 days after the last shower..

[upsideup]

My ex used to shower every 18 months or so.

There is no way that is true, for a start there would be no way anybody would be in a relationship with someone for that long if they hadnt showered at all.

[Rosiie]

Upsideup 😂😂😂😂

[InternetHoopJumper]

Was he liked this before you married him? How long has this been going on?

[Awwlookatmybabyspider]

YANBU. Sometimes people need telling
You tried being subtle, but It didn't work.
Other people will have noticed it too. There's no doubt about it.
Surely you can't go that long without letting off hideous pong. and, As for the poster who said her ex showers once in 18 months. Urgh. I can't for one minute think why he's your ex #nobcheese.
It costs neXT to nothing to be clean. You can get 4 bars of soap for £1.

[Oly5]

Yanbu OP, if my DH didn’t shower every day I’d have something to say about it! It’s just courteous to other humans. And yes, yor DH just smell at work. I’d struggle to be in a relationship with aomebodt who took such little care over personal hygiene

[SlothMama]

That's disgusting, I couldn't sleep next to someone who refuses to wash for that long.

[Knittedfairies]

Is it possible he's allergic to water? It is rare, but not unheard of.

[GrabbyMcGrabby]

Plenty or men can't be arsed to wash. It's disgusting. The one I know avoids washing simply because of laziness and blames others for not being given the opportunity to use the bathroom. Grossness. And you're being rude if you point out the stench.

[Topseyt]

He sounds utterly rank and disgusting.

I don't see what else you can do apart from either telling him or dumping him, even if that does sound a little extreme.

[JustVent]

Is he possibly allergic to water, for fuck sake.

[Awwlookatmybabyspider]

Fair enoughSome people don't need a bath/shower every day. We're all different.
I'm one of those I have to have a bath once a day at least or I'd hum. However no one can go 3 weeks without washing without stinking.

[Queenofthestress]

@knittedfairies I'm allergic to water, still manage to shower daily even if it does make me bright red and itchy!

[pilates]

LTB

[Touchmybum]

LTSB