Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Someone At Door 😣

413 replies

spagbol11 · 15/02/2018 19:15

It’s 19.13, I’ve just put 2yo dd to bed, done all my housework, been at work all day, so about to have a lovely hot bath and someone is knocking at my door, door is locked, not expecting anyone, my dp is working nights. AIBU not to answer or even check who it is...I’m scared

OP posts:
Chienrouge · 15/02/2018 21:46

What exactly is the advantage for me to answer? Someone will tell me soon

Well the advantage to me last time was someone giving me their insurance details after they hit my car. The time before that, the advantage was that they gave me gifts for my DC. Nice things.

Chienrouge · 15/02/2018 21:47

Oh and the time before that wasn’t an advantage to me, but it was to my neighbour. And I quite like helping my neighbours out. I might need them to help me out in future.

c75kp0r · 15/02/2018 21:50

Wow you some people are being needlessly mean to OP who was obviously bothered by the intrusion or she wouldnt have posted.

smellycoat · 15/02/2018 21:59

Just because you are paranoid does not mean they aren't out to get you

chibsortig · 15/02/2018 22:04

Are there really people that never answer the door :/ or never just visit anyone?
I dont know anyone i need an appointment to visit.

Fresta · 15/02/2018 22:11

It's pretty odd to not answer the door. I would as it could be any number of people: my neighbour, who sometimes pops in to let us know if she's going away, having work done etc; the gardener/ the window cleaner coming to collect their money; someone collecting for charity, selling stuff etc.; one of dd's friends wanting to know if she's in.

It might even be something important; someone needing help, or needing to tell you something.

I really can't imagine what sort of bad people could be knocking on your door.

RainbowGlitterFairy · 15/02/2018 22:13

To all the people who NEVER answer the door if not expecting someone. Why?? I don’t understand?

Coz my mum used to make us hide in silence everytime someone knocked, because her and Dad are dodgy as fuck and up to their eyeballs in debt. There is no reason anybody bad would be visiting my house, I have no debts and steer clear of trouble, but it's like an automatic reaction thing, I'm getting better now but its taken 15 years for me to actually open the door like a normal person.

The police btw will shout that they are police if its important.

gamerchick · 15/02/2018 22:21

theluckiest that’s one of the most British dilemmas I’ve read in ages Grin

PutUpWithRain · 15/02/2018 22:24

@chibsortig - yes. Yes, there are. For reasons. I wish it wasn't so, but there we are. My mum lives in the same building that I do. She knows now not to turn up on my doorstep without giving me at least a five minute warning first. Even if she does that, I might be in flitters because I didn't expect her.

I'm ok going to hers (mostly). But I struggle just to leave the house to go to the shop. I know how pathetic it sounds & I'd give anything to stop being like this. Having someone in my space is terrifying.

DiegoMadonna · 15/02/2018 22:27

To all the people who NEVER answer the door if not expecting someone. Why?? I don’t understand

I have the advantage that my home office window overlooks the front gate from above so I usually see who is coming before they knock. If it's not the postman or someone I personally know, I ignore it. 999 times out of 1000 it's someone trying to sell me something or ask for me to give them something, and I'm lazy and don't have a strong sense of curiosity. For the same reason (and additionally partly out of principle) I never answer calls from withheld numbers.

TheMaddHugger · 15/02/2018 22:28

((((((Hugs)))))) OP @spagbol11💜🌺🌸💜🌸🌺💜. I understand your distress given your recent history of Over Neady Neighbour

Haffiana · 15/02/2018 22:30

Drama fail thread, this is. Total fail.

Loyaultemelie · 15/02/2018 22:38

Am I the only one who read Someone's at the door and thought of American Gothic? Blush

MadMags · 15/02/2018 22:39

Hang on; is the “back story” the old lady who OP used to take shopping? Confused

LemonShark · 15/02/2018 22:39

"Today 22:04 chibsortig

Are there really people that never answer the door :/ or never just visit anyone?
I dont know anyone i need an appointment to visit."

I only answer because I'm on a top floor flat and can use the intercom. In a house I never answered. And I wouldn't bother if I wasn't expecting a parcel. Why would I? There's nobody who would show up unannounced and not have my number. It's not fear I don't think but there is an element of being aware of my own safety, if I'm alone in the flat and someone rings and I buzz them in I'm well aware I now have a stranger who could be anyone inside the block with me. I used to work in a male prison and have a keen sense of personal safety ever since. I'm not fearful, I'll actually be the one to happily walk around 'dodgy' areas in the dark no problem, but I am also the one to keep headphones out and be aware of who's around me at all times/be holding onto something I can use as a weapon like keys or whatever.

I don't know anyone whose house I'd just show up at, how odd Confused you make sure beforehand they're home and want company. Or it's just rude!

hmmwhatatodo · 15/02/2018 22:42

I think you were wise not to answer because it was 19.13 and 13 is an unlucky number. If it had been 19.12 or 19.14 then I would have said you were being ridiculous.

BusterGonad · 15/02/2018 22:42

Amazing thread, usually the 'not answering the door threads' get a huge thumbs up for the Op who's scared but it appears tonight that the MNetters are of a more normal breed! I'm currently in bed with my back door unlocked due to expecting my husband home later, I'm really rather calm and blasé about it!

hmmwhatatodo · 15/02/2018 22:42

It was probably grotbags by the way.

Sarahjconnor · 15/02/2018 22:58

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Bexter801 · 15/02/2018 23:12

@Sarahjconnor of course your arsed,or you wouldn't be checking :D do hope she puts us out of our misery tho :/

Chocywockydodahhhhhh · 15/02/2018 23:12

Oh come on give the op a break we all have silly fears. How many of you are scared of a spider for instance, a little creature or thunder
I never answer the door when I am not expected anyone as I had someone once in board daylight try to force their way in, it was a big man who was muttering about raping me. luckily I managed to knee him in the balls and then push him out. The police never caught him. But they recon he has been watching to see when I was in the house by myself as a night out had seen a man with the same description hanging around looking at the house, she said she thought it was odd but did not report it or tell us (thanks for that)
So now if I am not expecting anyone I don’t answer

Chocywockydodahhhhhh · 15/02/2018 23:13

Sorry that was meant to say a neighbour had seen a man

AnoiaUnstickMyDrawers · 15/02/2018 23:18

OP, I thought you were drama llamaing but then I noticed your name.
Do not answer that door.

LemonShark · 15/02/2018 23:22

AnoiaUnstickMyDrawers I'm pretty sure they've stopped ringing now 😂

What is it about her name?

MissTFied · 15/02/2018 23:25

Hmm. Although I wouldn't want to answer the door, I wouldn't hide as I'd want the caller to know the house was occupied, in case they had intentions to break in.

Maybe I'd call out from an upstairs window.