to feel sorry for my friend with the eco-warrior DH?

[k2p2k2tog]

(sort of lighthearted but not really)

Very close friend is married to a professional eco-warrior. He's employed high up in a green charity and has in the past been involved in Green politics. They have two daughters of school age. Friend also works but not in the green sector, she's a nurse.

Because her DH is a dyed in the wool "knit your own lentil" person, he has to be seen to walk the walk as well as talk the talk. Nothing non-eco. They do have a car, but he cycles to work and she takes the train.

But what makes me feel REALLY sorry for her, and her girls, is that they have bought a touring caravan for all holidays. Despite the fact they're earning good money and could afford a week in the sun somewhere, they spend every holiday cooped up in a tin box so he can show what a WORTHY person he is.

They are currently in Wales. In the freezing cold and rain. In fucking FEBRUARY.

It sounds like a lot of fun to me, with stops in major cities to look around.

Again, you are expressing your own preferences. Nothing more.

I really hate package holidays - used to do them with my parents but find them soulless and they always make me feel a bit dirty...

Given the choice between a week in Mallorca and a week in Wales I'd probably take Wales. I'd be up for taking the camper van to Europe though and visiting lots of interesting places that way - actually I'm feeling quite jealous of the camper van...

As for your friend - I'm sure she knew what she was letting herself in for when she married him. My husband is pretty keen on eco stuff and it is hard accomodating his views sometimes, but I'm also proud of him for giving a shitl

Anyway, why not have a chat to your friend instead of banging on to us about what you like to do on your holidays?

If it turns out she would like to do something else, you could pass on some of the excellent suggestions for environmentally-conscious holidays further afield, that have been made on this thread.

What do you mean she "has" to do it all?

She could just book a holiday on her own or with her mates

No-one in a healthy relationship HAS to do anything....she is a free person. If she doesn't like it, she can leave him.

The poor woman, why can't she just go with her dc? Leave him to his caravan?

I really like the caravans! So cosy and the noise when it raining.. But I dislike any sort of extreme behaviour! It's too extreme.. And for that reason I wouldn't pander to it...

If more people behaved like this there would be more hope for our children's future. Ever thought about that?!!

Have one of these

That's right, I'm super jealous of her freezing her bits off in a caravan in February. Lucky old her. hmm I have done the caravanning bit as a child and in bad weather, it sucks.

I do wish you'd stop going on about freezing in a caravan. Caravans are built much better than they were when you were a child. They have central heating now, and pitches on sites have electric hook up.
Staying in a caravan really is just like staying in a house. The only differences are that they're smaller, can be moved to different places, and you can hear the rain on the roof.

Your childhood memories are colouring your views, which don't match the reality nowadays.

OP still won't have it that she's projecting her own bias onto this 'friend', and is frustrated that they aren't immediate seeing the light and should all jet off somewhere.

I don't think it's the OP's 'friend' who has a problem.

If you are sat indoors watching the rain lash down watching a film couldn't you do that at home

I'm still shitstirring wondering if he would 'let' her go on a plane journey holiday with the kids, if that was what she wanted?

I want answers OP!

"Doesn't that sound like a lovely, striaghtforward journey?"

To me it sounds fun. We did exactly that sort of thing when I was a child (except it took longer as we lived in Sweden). Great memories, great experiences. We got a much better idea of what Europe is like and really felt we were travelling: it was adventure in a way that mooching around an airport can never be.

My db has travelled in this way with his son ever since he was a baby. My nephew who is now a young adult absolutely loves it.

Caring about the environment and the planet’s future? What a total bastard, she should definitely leave him.

🤷🏻‍♀️🙄

I don't get what's 'eco' about buying a caravan? Buying a large vehicle which uses a lot of fuel (on top of already owning a car?) doesn't seem very 'eco' to me. Could someone explain? Why is that better than travelling to somewhere by train and staying in a hotel?

So you have no idea what your friend thinks. You are just assuming? You have been asked multiple times and I will ask as well. Has your friend said that she doesn’t like or enjoy this way of life? Has she said anything at all? I’ll await your answer.

I am also of the view that the energy used in constructing/types of materials used and the running costs of transporting and heating a caravan are not eco friendly in the slightest.

Sometimes the eco-friendly approach is a cover for tight wad inclinations.

HAD A THOUGHT

Does her husband realise that having kids is pretty much the worst thing you can do for the environment?

I read on here that it was like taking >20 long-haul flights a year

I'd rather take the long-haul flight tbh....

Why is that better than travelling to somewhere by train and staying in a hotel?

It isnt

YABU

I suspect you feel bad about yourself when faced with someone who is morally superior.

I also have an 'eco-husband' - but Wales in February would be my genuine preference over Mallorca. I am just not bothered about going anywhere like that. And I love Wales, at any time of year. We are all different!

People would be quick to call someone in the green sector a hypocrite if they flew lots. So I don't blame him. Funny thing to feel sorry for them about though. I bet his kids have had the time of their life.

We went from London to Switzerland by train last year - it took two days to get there but that was part of the attraction (most of all for train-obsessed DS) - London to Cologne, a night in Cologne, then a train all the way to Interlaken, arriving late afternoon.

I hate flying myself, but not for wanky puritanical posturing reasons - aeroplanes give me horrendous earache and I love train travel...

I suspect you feel bad about yourself when faced with someone who is morally superior.

What a pile of absolute shite!

To those talking about train travel across Europe, have you seen the prices to get from Glasgow to London? £200-250 one way and thats before you start adding up the costs to get to a destination over the Channel. We certainly couldnt afford it!

Oh and that is based on going tomorrow.

In the summer hols it goes up to £450 one way.

PyongyangKipperbang, just checked on-line, can get a one-way ticket Glasgow to London with booked seat for £30, plus 75p booking fee. Travelling on a tuesday two weeks hence.

What's it got to do with you??????

Btw.... we are just back from Scotland, in a caravan, in the snow. It was fab. And much better than a week in the sun. Dont be so judgy.