Do you take your 12/13 year olds phone away at night?

[honeylulu]

Just that ... parents of 12-13 year olds Do you take your child's phone off then at night?
We take ours off him at 9pm (more like 10 or 10.30pm as we often only remember when we are going to bed). He says no one else's mum and dad do this.
Are we too strict? Or is it usual to allow overnight phone in room at this age?

Does Ourpact disable Word?

Oh don't bother ds has just told me how he'd disable Ourpact.

My partner takes his teenage daughter’s phone out of the room at night. My daughter (11) keeps hers by her bed to use as an alarm...but I discussed removing it and getting her a traditional alarm clock just last night, as I worry she’s checking it and disturbing her sleep.

Lots of parents do this, it’s not unusual.

Our 12yo, 13 soonish, has to ask us whenever he wants to use his phone in his room - in fact he's supposed to check with us whenever he uses it at home -, and we take it before bedtime.

Littlebillie - gotta love a keyboard earlier questioning peoples parenting when they know nothing. DSs phone is turned off and on charge and not that I need to answer to you but I check it every 2 or 3 days. DSs has no idea when I will check but he is a good lad and deserves our trust, if he ever provesus wrong then he will be punished. As for lazy parenting well quite frankly thats laughable. It's no battle either way TBH but maybe I'm lucky that my children respect me and follow my rules. Sad that you can't possibly imagine other people do things differently and that it can also work.

I was impressed to learn that in my DDs school when they were in early secondary the kids organized a stock of "old" phones and ipods, available for the children whose parents removed their phones at night. It was a community action.

Also work with teenagers and i would never ever let my DC have a phone in their bedroom through the night. Tiredness is the least of my worries.

Oh don't bother ds has just told me how he'd disable Ourpact

They know so much about all this stuff, parents are just about keeping up.

Yes I do and she is very happy to leave it downstairs. She has an alarm clock.

We have a no phones upstairs rule 24/7 and it applies to us as well. I also regularly check by DD's phone, including reading her messages. One thing this has taught me is that my friends who let their children take phones to bed, and claim their children are responsible with their phone use, are all deluded.

I don't - I believe a couple of dd1 (13) friends Mums do.

Absolutely yes. I work with teenagers and this is routine advice we give out to parents for both safeguarding and health reasons. Lots of reasearch shows that just having phone in room can be disruptive to sleep.

I also routinely recommend getting teens an alarm clock.

mine just leave them to charge downstairs, always have.

Yep my Dd is 15 and we have a no phones or iPads in the bedroom after lights out, they get plugged in the kitchen charging ready for the next day, she’s allowed them in her room during the day but not once she’s gone to bed.

I started this rule about a couple of years ago as she was waking up tired and not being about to switch off at night, it works well especially as she’s in year 10 and her school have ramped up homework and constant revision and can tell she sleeps better because of it.

Yep and I read everything in Facebook, messenger, snap chat the works.

I tried that briefly but the amount of drivel made me want to hide in a hole

I also take my ds phone at 9pm. I used to take my dds. But as she is 17 now it's up to her if she goes to 6th form absolutely knackered.

I insisted on all gadgets downstairs before bedtime until after GCSEs, then I left it up to them. There has to be a point in mid teens that you let them self regulate.

I can't imagine setting a bedtime or removing a phone from a 17 year old!!

No technology upstairs so not in bedrooms anyway!
The bloody things ping all night so I can see lots of kids do have them!

How are you reading their snapchat....???

They just had basic text and phone phones that were PAYG so no need to confiscate them. There was more lost phone (in bedroom mess)/ uncharged phone chaos. No computer use after bed time at that age.

Can I ask if you keep the same rules for sleepovers ?
My dd is mortified that I am going to tell her friend that all phones etc are kept downstairs at night.
She says that she ( dd) will be mortified and how can I tell another child what to do?
My answer.. my house, my rules.

Age 13 by the way.

Yes on weekdays, I used to let ds (13) have his until I caught him staying up late. Now its not allowed in his room after bedtime and charges elsewhere in house.
Weekends I don't really bother.

I think I would have been less than thrilled if a parent confiscated my child's property at a sleepover. What if it were your child, and they felt sufficiently homesick/ bullied/ uncomfortable/ threatened/ frightened by something an adult was doing at a house they were staying at that they wanted to call you - and the person making them feel that way had taken their phone?