'I don't shake women's hands'

[canary1]

In a work setting today, a client was seen by four colleagues, 2 male, 2 female. The client shook hands with the two male colleagues at the end, and when I held my hand out in expectation, this is what he said. I know many muslims and never ran into this before, though this is his reason. I'm disgusted at such overt sexism dressed up as religion. I can't say that's just his beliefs any more than I can excuse any other overt discriminatory behaviour. How is this regarded as an acceptable way to behave?

Eltonjohnssyrup

once you know why is it so hard to be tolerant?

And why exactly is it so hard for Muslims to be tolerant of western expectations and shake nobody's hand rather than just men (or women)? Does tolerance only extend in one direction?

Yep, that seems to be the case. Of course it is a form of racism due to western people overcompensating.

I will never understand why people get upset about this. Most practicing Muslims, male and female, don't like to touch unrelated members of the opposite sex, it's not misogyny because women do it too and it has nothing to do with utter twaddle like potentially unclean menstruating women.
Why should I have to touch a man if I don't wan't to?
Why would a man be offended if I don't wan't to touch him?
Why does modern western culture say it's not O.K to touch people who don't wan't to be touched but you think Muslims don't count?

It's fine to not touch people you don't want to touch as long as you're not discriminating.
Would it be OK if I was generally happy to shake hands but refused to shake the hand of someone who was Chinese? Or deaf?

That would just be my choice, right?

Stateless Princess...under the scenario posted in the OP, the client shook hands with her male colleagues but not with her. That is clear discrimination and should not be tolerated, irrespective of the reasons behind it.

Or is it just women as a group that should accept discrimination?

Many many Muslims don't shake hands with members of the opposite sex. It doesn't matter if the other person is married or not, young or old, Muslim or otherwise.
If the behaviour was otherwise fine I don't see the issue.
Would have been a bit silly to refuse shaking hands with everybody if his religion doesn't allow him physical contact with members of the opposite sex only.

Completely agree with everything Elton has said.

So if my god suggests I don't shake hands with Chinese people that's OK is it

He is showing you respect not meaning to insult you at all.

stateless, perhaps you will explain why the alternative of shaking nobody's hand (which respects both religious sentiment and western norms and law re non-discrimination) is unacceptable?

I keep asking this question but some posters seem extremely reluctant to answer it. Probably because they can't.

Leonard what if the op does not feel respect?
Do the man's intentions override her feelings?

Elton I suspect in RL it might be because as usual a man does not want to risk offending/upsetting another man (which might happen if you refuse to shake their hand in a business situation) whereas who gives a toss if a woman is offended? (Which is why male colleagues should stand up for female colleagues in this situation.) On MN? Fuck knows.

Why should I have to touch a man if I don't wan't to?
Why would a man be offended if I don't wan't to touch him?

Exactly how is a male colleague, or indeed any man, going to infect the pristine, superior individual who is refusing to practise polite western behaviour in a western country?

Or vice versa as detailed by the OP?

Elton - I guess the only issue with no handshake is that it still stems from the fact that you believe in treating men and women differently.

Which we don't do in the Uk (in theory anyway!).

He is showing you respect not meaning to insult you at all.

So why can he not show even more respect by not shaking the hands of men either?

Can you please explain why this alternative is not acceptable?

StealthPolarBear

So if my god suggests I don't shake hands with Chinese people that's OK is it

Not at all. Your god needs to learn some manners.

And if a similar refusal to shake hands based on ethnicity would be OK?. It would be respectful, right?

Exactly rose. Exactly.

It does often feel like sexism is a bit of a joke. Oh just put up and shut up.

Stealth the examples you gave are discrimination, I don't see this as discrimination, he's not doing it because he thinks she's lesser than him or dirty etc. But no, I do't think anyone should have to touch someone they don't want to, whatever the reason, even if I don't agree with them.

For all we know the OP might have had her finger right up her nose or scratching her arris before the neeting .

This is discrimination. Why on earth wouldn't it be?

Would have been a bit silly to refuse shaking hands with everybody if his religion doesn't allow him physical contact with members of the opposite sex only.

Why would it be 'a bit silly'? Can you actually articulate a reason for this? What is 'silly' about choosing an alternative that allows you to fulfill your religious and cultural needs whilst also respecting the legal requirement not to discriminate women and showing equal respect for the opposing culture?