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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ring my mum at 3:30am

151 replies

Mirrorbella · 08/02/2018 03:36

I’ve just woken up and had an urge to make sure my Dad is OK. I’ve never had this feeling before and I can’t settle. I don’t want to wake her up unnecessarily but at the same time I’m thinking “what if....”

I’m not usually particularly woo and hadn’t had any dreams that would have unsettled me etc

OP posts:
georgeoutside · 08/02/2018 16:32

I wouldn't have called at that time, no. Of my phone went off at 3.30am I would wake up in a panic then when I found out it was just a 'feeling' I would not be able to get back to sleep!

That said, I notice you ha ent been back OP, I do hope all is ok

IAmMumWho · 08/02/2018 16:52

@Aridane @Nicknacky maybe it would have been a prediction. I dunno. But FYI I didn't wake the whole house.

Nicknacky · 08/02/2018 16:54

Regardless if you woke the house, I don't blame your brother for being passed off. And it was not a prediction!!

IAmMumWho · 08/02/2018 17:01

@Nicknacky I didn't say it was a prediction did I?

Pittcuecothecookbook · 08/02/2018 17:03

You literally just said it would maybe be a prediction 😂

Nicknacky · 08/02/2018 17:03

You said it would maybe would have been a prediction?!

IAmMumWho · 08/02/2018 17:05

@Pittcuecothecookbook yes if it had happened. Like I know this weeks lotto numbers

kaytee87 · 08/02/2018 17:05

my DM called me at silly oclock to tell my my DSis had gone in to labour.... full work day ahead, not impressed

My mil phoned me to say when my dh's cousins baby had been born around midnight (we go to bed at 10, she knows this). I wasn't very happy, why would I honesty need to know until the following day and why phone me instead of dh?!

Evelynismycatsformerspyname · 08/02/2018 17:06

My mum used to claim we had a telepathic connection because she always knew it was going to be me as soon as the phone rang.

All very well, but from the age of 18 when I left home until I said enough is enough in my mid 30s she demanded that I phone her every Sunday evening without fail, on the basis her mother had demanded the same of her.

If I hadn't phoned by 8pm she'd phone everyone connected to me, who's number she had, demanding to know what had happened to me because she "had a terrible feeling". She scared my non English speaking mil witless doing that! Nothing bad had ever happened except I'd lost track of time and forgotten the compulsory phone call.

She also "had a hunch" that I was pregnant when I was at university and rang the landline in my shared house to ask my housemates - whom she'd never met. Obviously that wasn't embarrassing at all and nobody ever brought it up for years afterwards... Needless to say I wasn't pregnant nor had I had any kind of pregnancy scare.

Silly sod has a scientific background too. There's no accounting for the astounding irrationality of human behaviour sometimes.

GnotherGnu · 08/02/2018 17:07

at 28 I woke up at 1.30am and something was telling me I HAD to phone my dad. I hadnt woken him as he had bad heartburn but assured me he was fine but 2 hours later my grandad phoned me to tell me my dad had had a heart attack and had been rushed to a hospital 40 miles away to have emergency surgery.

And of course being woken from sleep by a phone call at 1.30 a.m. did his heart a power of good ...

ChaosNeverRains · 08/02/2018 17:18

I once had an awful dream that my nephew aged 2 at the time had been kidnapped. I didn't hesitate to call my brother at silly o'clock to see if all was well. He gave me a gob full for waking him but I needed to make sure LO was well. All was but still, weird dreams or just a gut feeling does make us panic. I'd do it again if I had another scary dream. I would block someone’s number if they called me in the middle of the night over something so irrationally stupid like that. And I would never leave my children unsupervised with them on the basis that they clearly have issues.

There is no such thing as intuition or telepathy or gut feeling or any of that crap. If there was don’t you think that people would be predicting the good as well as the chillingly bad?

whiskyowl · 08/02/2018 17:27

When I was seven, I had a premonition my school would burn down. A really vivid dream that it did. Then, then next week IT DID BURN DOWN. Some builders were doing work on the roof, they spilled some tar, and it went up while we were in the assembly.

OMG OMG OMG!

I'm totally, like, psychic.

Only I'm not. It's a really normal dream for kids to have. I bet every kid thinks wistfully about their school burning own and having another 6 weeks of holiday - hooray hooray, and all the parents groan and mutter that they will need more gin to cope.

Plus, a horrible boy kept telling me he was going to burn the school down while I was having a wee, and being at just the age when I was convinced that I was absolutely certainly a minature Sherlock Holmes, I spent my time trying to catch him in the act of doing nefarious and subtle things like playing with matches. I also accused the school caretaker of mass murder, fortunately he was a man with a good sense of humour.

In the same way, we all dread parents or friends becoming sick and think about it often - perhaps fleetingly, perhaps consciously. I must think about losing my parents a good number of times a day - it's a real fear for me, especially since they both had cancer. These feelings are a coincidence.

Gottagetmoving · 08/02/2018 17:59

I once had an awful dream that my nephew aged 2 at the time had been kidnapped. I didn't hesitate to call my brother at silly o'clock to see if all was well. He gave me a gob full for waking him but I needed to make sure LO was well. All was but still, weird dreams or just a gut feeling does make us panic. I'd do it again if I had another scary dream

You need help.
Apart from being totally selfish, it's insane.
Your brother was annoyed...but you would do it again? You only care about yourself.

Pittcuecothecookbook · 08/02/2018 18:00

That makes no sense at all IAmAMumWho. "I would have predicted that if only I'd been right". Bloody hell.

CruCru · 08/02/2018 18:05

My Mum once did this to me. It wasn’t the end of the world but I probably spoke to her like she was daft and was a bit tired at work the next day.

I think the “gut feeling” is when you are in a potentially dangerous situation (like walking home at midnight) rather than waking up in a panic.

Rachie1986 · 08/02/2018 19:21

OP, come back!

Sallystyle · 08/02/2018 19:24

That's a bit OTT. I really wouldn't class it as one of the nastiest things you could do to someone.

mommytoboo86 · 09/02/2018 00:44

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

GnotherGnu · 09/02/2018 00:51

Mommy, try reading the MN posting rules, and maybe even complying with them.

The point is that if you phone anyone at 1.30 a.m., whether they're awake or asleep, you will give them a shock. I know that if our phone goes off at that time my heart is instantly pounding because I assume it must be bad news. Think about that for a bit.

Thegirlthatwanted2begod · 09/02/2018 01:00

Some of the replies on here are really horrible, let's see what the update if any is, I would definitely call if I had a strong gut feeling like Op mentioned.

OP hope all is ok in the end, ignore the hysterical responses

mommytoboo86 · 09/02/2018 01:07

@Aridane with my mother if I had phoned and she hadnt awnsered I would have gone straight there cos she NEVER let her phone go unanswered. I would have found her collapsed and perhaps could have saved her life by getting her help sooner as she was still alive wen she was found but died on the way to hospital.
With my dad maybe if I had gone over instead of taken his word for being fine I could again of got him help sooner and perhaps he would not have life limiting disabilities now which are a result of the heart attack.
My dd could have breathed in the vomit and died if left until 8 the next morning, she's wot we call a silent puker which scares the shit out of me.
And any of those 4 men could have abused my children and my best friends children if I'd ignored my 'feeling' and made danm sure they never got anywhere near.

maybe none of the above would have changed but certainly if my dd and dad had died and I'd ignored those feelings I would never recover.

It was actually my grandad who told me after my mom went, that I had my nanas 'gift' and is the most saniest person I know and a very respected member of his community
and for all the 1s out there saying we r mentally unstable maybe u should research it just a little.

mommytoboo86 · 09/02/2018 01:34

@Gnothergnu I have read them and I am allowed to swear ("we are all adults") if u are referring to calling u a name then that's rather hypocritical of u seeing as ur comment made perfectly clear that u were saying I caused my father's heart attack.
u can report my post if ur that concerned and I can report urs so...

maybe YOU might get a shock and have your heart behave in that manner but my dad ain't a snowflake so even if he was asleep he wouldn't have a problem with it.
oh and just to clarify he had a heart attack due to his arteries being blocked not cos he 'had a shock'

MrsGB2225 · 09/02/2018 01:40

Everything ok?

Ivymaud · 09/02/2018 03:29

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Evelynismycatsformerspyname · 09/02/2018 05:49

thegirlthatwanted If there is an update it doesn't mean much - the op could read the replies, feel embarrassed and post that her intuition was right to "prove" that she was right, and not self absorbed and irrational, to phone her parents at 3am on the basis of a feeling.

As this is an anonymous internet forum we will never actually know what really happened, no matter what anyone types.