To ring my mum at 3:30am

[Mirrorbella]

I’ve just woken up and had an urge to make sure my Dad is OK. I’ve never had this feeling before and I can’t settle. I don’t want to wake her up unnecessarily but at the same time I’m thinking “what if....”

I’m not usually particularly woo and hadn’t had any dreams that would have unsettled me etc

If something had happened surely they would have called?

If I get a call after ten I think ‘Christ, who’s died??’.

maybe it's just my family, but my mother would think I was absolutely nuts if I did this. I would only expect to make or receive a call at that time of day, if something was seriously wrong.

Just to give another side to this. I woke up once thinking my grandmother had died. Put it down to an odd dream or whatever. She had actually had a big stroke and was found in an empty bath cold and naked. She didn't die so that bit was wrong but I will never forget the strong overwhelming feeling that she needed to be checked on.

It could have been a coincidence, I don't know what it was. I was only a teenager at the time and I still remember how real it seemed and it really scared me.

I wouldn't ring though if there were two people in the house.

Hi op,

I know that feeling, I once had a dream my sister was pregnant and woke up around 4am wanting to call and ask if she was. I didn't though, I waited till 9 when I knew she would be up, called her and she was pregnant! I know its hard when you have a gut feeling but its not ok to wake people up in the middle of the night for one.

Have you heard back from your mum this morning?

I did this once when I was at university and woke up very suddenly worrying about my 14 year old brother... oddly enough he was vomiting from a stomach bug and had bad cramps when I called but nothing fatal..

Mum didnt know whether to be impressed or mad with me

“RandomDreams

If anyone rang me at that time because of a 'gut feeling'' I'd fucking murder them and spread their body parts far and wide."
Then their premonition that something bad was going to happen would have been right wouldn't it? :o

Hope he was ok

My mom is a bit woo and sometimes "hears" me call out mom in the night. Usually it's when I've been up ill or worrying or something. But she doesn't phone me at 3am and I don't phone her because I know that would scare her

No I wouldn’t. If one of my kids called at that time to ask if we were ok I would ask them wtf was wrong with them. If there was a problem we would phone to let people know. Not the other way round passed on a feeling

I woke up at 1in the morning a few years ago and just knew something was wrong but no idea what. At 6am the phone rang and it was the hospital 250 miles away where my mum lived to say she was on life support following a fall and an allergic reaction to anaesthetic used when they reset her broken wrist. That had happened at about 1am.

I text my mum if I ever need her in the night (MH issues) as she tends to wake a few times sometimes for an hour or so.

Have you spoken to her yet?

I wouldn't have called either but I'd have written down what i was feeling including any specific anxieties and maybe taken a phone pic so if anything weird had happened it would be properly Wooo. Though not helpful if it's not good news. Hope all is ok.

was everything ok op?

I get that you're feeling anxious but waking your parents will only serve to allay your fears and is very unfair on them.If anything is wrong with your Dad I'm sure you'd be (one of) the first to know.

My dad did die in the early hours, but my mum only rang us in the morning. There was no point in waking us up and she did the right thing.

I'd never wake up anyone at 3am with a bad feeling.

As a mum I'm already used to being woken up at 3.30am to soothe my children. Even when they are grown ups if waking me up at 3.30am bring them comfort then thats what I would want them to do, I couldnt ever be annoyed at my child for worrying about me or DH.

Any news OP?

Being woken up by an adult child on a whim is so different from a toddler crying out in the night.

I've had a total of 4 calls in the middle of the night. Two drunk wrong numbers and the other two the worst possible news about a sibling and a parent. I've had dreams similar to OP, where I've wanted to know something there and then. Everything seems worse at 3am. But actually ringing seems a tad extreme. One simply has to get a grip. If my dd rang me at 3am just to check I was ok I'd be a little worried myself.

As a human,parent or otherwise, I would be bloody annoyed if anyone rang me at 3.30 unless it was for a very good reason. I've done my broken nights. Besides I don't have my phone in the bedroom so am uncontactable anyway.

One of my friends rang me at 4am when I was 37 weeks pregnant with DD, because she had a “gut feeling” I was in labour and wanted to make sure I was OK. I wasn’t in labour (wtf use her call would have been if I was I don’t know), I was bloody exhausted couldn’t get settled after and I still had work in the morning. Pissed off doesn’t even begin to cover it tbh. Those saying “follow your gut” - if your gut is telling you to ring someone else to put your own mind at rest at silly o’clock please don’t!

I can't imagine ever being peed off with my child for doing this. Even as an adult.

Different if it was a regular thing but once in a blue moon, who cares. If dad was having some kind of episode and needed help, but mum was asleep, then a phone call to wake might indeed be useful!

Being rang in the middle of the night is very unsettling especially if there's nothing going on to prompt it. Hopefully everything is ok. Be good to hear back from the OP.