Mother in law going in my bedroom

[madwifenewlife]

Ok not sure if I'm being unreasonable to be bothered by this, or if it is a bit odd. We moved house a couple of months ago so been trying to get it sorted out. It's taking time as needs some work and was left in a state.

But every time my in laws come round mil will nip to the loo, and then just let her self into my bedroom for a look! My husband found her in there the second to last time, and today I had stuff in the landing as was moving my daughters room round and blocked my room on purpose. She just started climbing over bits making her way to my bedroom! I said oh don't go in there it's a right mess! But she still went in. I just find it a bit odd now to just keep going in there, we have been here a bit so it's not changed or been decorated yet! I feel like getting a massive dildo and putting it on the bed or something next time they pop round just to put her off doing it again lol. Anyway would this bother anyone else or am I being silly?

Also my bedroom is no where near the bathroom she doesn't need to walk past it as my stairs split off at the top, and my landing is quite long each way, so bathroom is a different end to my bedroom.

Set up a sex swing. Problem solved.

What a nosey cow!

I’d definitely go for the giant realistic dildo option

YANBU Very firmly tell her to stop doing it.

I get what it's like with a MIL who will not be told and will continue doing what she wants to do regardless of your feelings. I hate being touched (have since found out I have aspergers) and when I was pregnant with DC2, MIL would not stop rubbing my belly, even when I was a few weeks and had no bump at all. It's always quite obvious with me when I don't like something or uncomfortable as I cannot hide it, but she will just ignore that. Eventually I told DH he would have to say something. We knew she was coming over so I waited upstairs so DH had chance to tell her not to do it, he did, I came down, she stepped towards me to hug me (which I also fucking hate) and sneakily put her hand between us so she could rub my bump without DH and FIL seeing. I stepped back and asked her what she was doing and she just laughed, both DH and FIL loudly told her she had been told not to, again she laughed it off. Next time, I was dropping DS over to hers for the afternoon, she waited until DH left the room then stepped towards me with her hand out! I very firmly stepped back and said, quite loudly, "I don't like that!" She asked me why! I said I just don't. She didn't do it again. Nor did she ever have DS again like she did before for a few hours now and again! Stupid cow. All because she couldn't do as she liked.

So be firm and persistent.

Hahaha! Love it.

Honestly though she's the sort to not think she's overstepped and shouldn't of seen something, or been in there. she will be disgusted and prob tell us off for having something vulgar left about for people to find! She's a hypocrite tho as it's one rule for her, but you can't do the same.

After speaking to my mum about it she thinks she's a bit jealous deep down, as she's always been a snob and had an upper status. We have been very fortunate lately and moved to a large house in a "posh" ( I'm not posh or a snob) area and she's not used to me being on par with her so it could be to do with this. So she's trying to make her self feel superior in a different way. Ahh I don't know but it's still fucking annoying lol!

Remember the poster who left visa application forms for moving to Australia in her room for her MIL to find?

frasier Bloody brilliant! Wasn't there a Christmas thread with one of these on a neighbour's wall wearing a bit of tinsel? Grab that one and give it to OP.

Your MIL is a piece of work. Slip some laxative in her tea and she'll be too busy using the bathroom to snoop in your boudoir.

I'd take a picture of yourselves butt naked holding a sign over your privates saying " mum/mil please respect our privacy and dont come in this room again, thanks terry and June xxx

Them frame it and leave it where she will read it

I feel for you, my mum does this, and uses my moisturiser etc without asking (and tried to spray on scented moisturiser because the bottle looked like perfume, and assumes she can borrow anything she's not bothered bringing forgotten.

@FlashTheSloth oh goodness I can't believe the cheek! My son has Aspergers so I understand where you are coming from! Mil also asked me if he had grown out of that yet!

So I honestly think she's a lost cause!

Are you my SIL? Try to get your DH to tell her, and if you can get him to force a change please let me know how. Good luck!

@feelslikearockandahardplace you have one too? I wish I had a sil to join forces with lol!

"Mil also asked me if he had grown out of that yet!" WOW! She's a piece of work isn't she! I have to say, none of my family (except DH) know, they wouldn't get it at all.

Go the whole hog. Whip, handcuffs, dildo, gimp suit the lot, that will give her a shock.

Next time just point to the door & say ‘OUT & stay out’ like she’s muddy dog in there.

If DH doesn’t like it, he might learn to listen to your reasonable requests and get her to behave somewhat.

BUT it’s wouldn’t be a problem for me...

...because if she’d said that about DS she wouldn’t be setting foot over the threashold and if DH didn’t like it, he could go to his Mammy's house & live there.

I think sometimes she's after a rise out of me, as she only says things if we are alone. We get on ok, but she's a nightmare. She's always ruled the roost then I came along with different opinions and rattled her lol! But after 15 years I'm used to her now but still I get the odd time she makes me

Dh doesn't get rattled by anything like that he's very straight forward and to the point. he's so used to her he just doesn't notice. We also believe that he has Aspergers too since learning about it with my son having it. So could be why he doesn't pick up on her behaviour as it's not directly bothering him.

I think il mess my bed up next time and leave some condominium wrappers about, and when she goes in il follow her and say whoops I wasn't expecting company good job you didn't just turn up an hour ago

I know that would be funny, OP, but really it's not dealing with it. You should say something to her or just put a lock on the door. If she asks why there's a lock (proving she's tried the door) then I'd just say, "I like my privacy. I don't like people wandering into my bedroom" and eyeball her.

I would do the “please stop going into my bedroom for a nosey” in front of FIL, then put a lock on the door.

Reading this has got me annoyed all over again about my MIL snooping. She rearranged all the clothes in my DS’s drawers - absolutely no idea why (except perhaps it wasn’t arranged how she thinks it should have been) and it took me an hour to put everything back as it was, because she’d mixed in a load of clothes that were too small for him that I’d put in a bag for the charity shop. Fucking bizarre.
She was always “just helping” though. She was just helping to put the clean washing away - but putting my underwear in my underwear drawer, that’s crossing a big boundary for me. And she wasn’t just helping, she was having a nosy. She knows it, I know it.
Some people are so strange. If/when I become a MIL, I’d never dream of doing anything like that. Disrespectful and rude.

Sorry to hijack your thread, OP, but I feel better getting that out.
As you were.

Set a trap so when she opens the door something falls on her head. Like flour.

I know a lady that makes plaster casts of body parts. Get one done of your fanny and have it in pride of place in your bedroom. Your DH would probably love it as well!

That's so weird. Your husband should make her stop-the fact that you find it uncomfortable is enough of an issue.

@AnyFarrahFowler oh it's so infuriating isn't it! But it's so hard to explain too when people don't have a mil like it. Please feel free to hijack all you like, rant away lol!

You said she thinks she’s superior to you. I like Annie’s suggestion of saying with contempt “OUT! Get OUT of my bedroom, it’s private.” I would be tempted to add, “It’s rude to barge into someone else’s bedroom. Were you raised in a barn?” That would really get her goat haha.

I'm sure if I asked Dh he would say something to her, if I really wanted him to. I've only mentioned that it's a bit weird to him so far. But he doesn't really see an issue with her, And I don't think he would want to upset his Mum ( she would take great offence) if he did say something to her. He never has done about anything was brought up not to argue or answer back. I don't think I want to be the reason he starts. Or make him upset his mum just for me.