For fussy eaters to drive me crazy?

[MrsPreston11]

Kid in my daughters class (not SEN, that I can sympathise with) is the fussiest eater ever.

To the point I won't have her over for dinner.

Just eats plain pasta, peanut butter sandwiches (has to be certain PB and certain white bread, of course) and chicken nuggets and chips but of course alllll the sweets.

I feel like every fussy kid I've know has had that as their menu.....

I just cannot get my head around it. HOW?

My only assumption is that the parent feeds them what they want for a quiet life. Unfair?

Or am I being totally unreasonable and missing something?

@Whatshallidonowpeople You are talking nonsense. Food refusal is common in autism. My son just cannot manage to swallow the wrong food.

Thing is my kid definitely tries it on sometimes, I don't make a battle out of it and I don't pander to it and it all works out nicely in the end. Ex- he goes through a phase of only wanting pepperoni pizza, I just give him something else he'll normally eat happily, say a baked sweet potato and go in another room a bit. He'll have eaten most of the potato when I pop back in. If I'd pander to him, his diet would be rubbishy

I don't understand why you've said this. Are you trying to imply you're a better parent because "you just give him something else and don't pander to him"? Your child IS NOT a fussy eater, I don't know why you've posted that.

My SIL says she doesn’t care what her DCs eat because any interference could result in eating disorders. So when they come here one has eaten a whole bag of Haribou on the way and wants no lunch.An hour later she is hungry so is given a cake. Her brother takes only chicken and olives for lunch. Both refuse shepherd’s pie and vegetables for dinner so their dad is ordering pizza when my DCs are in bed.
Yes, this drives me mad.

Nedknobs, that is not fussy eating though.

That is just weird parenting

I am a “fussy eater” compared to the rest of my family and friends. I had medical issues with my throat and eating as a child, and I think my mum trying to force me to eat certain vegetables and foods (not in a cruel way - with good intentions) means I just can’t eat any of those now. I recently failed a £50 bet with DH for me to finally eat a tomato (yes really!!) because I gagged and heaved and still couldn’t swallow it. I take being called “fussy” with a pinch of salt but it could be easy to be offended. Over the years without being forced I have tried more and more different things and have really varied and expanded my diet. I don’t make a fuss of meals and I will go anywhere socially with friends for a meal and I will always find something to eat on a menu. The only difference between me and someone else is that I necessary wouldn’t eat everything that came on the plate and I would eat round the bits I didn’t like (or couldn’t swallow). The ideal meal for me is a carvery or buffet where I can just help myself go the things I like. I have two children and I have made a point of not forcing them to eat things, but have always bought a variety of things for them to try and told them if they want to try something in particular to let me know. As a result they are both really adventurous eaters and my DS eats pretty much anything apart from eggs, and DD likes anything apart from cheese.

Sorry Lemonnaise it wasn't meant to offend, nor was I implying I'm a better parent, I got lucky with DS as he's usually fairly easy to feed. I read what you posted about your kid and it doesn't sound at all easy.

What I meant is that most kids have fussy phases, but a majority can be encouraged to have a decent diet. However, even a pliable child can have strong preferences and ultimately there's fuck all you can do as a parent.

Also, I get kids refusing certain foods- I hate peppers because they smell rotten (as in gone off) to me. I can't eat them as the smell makes me gag.

As far as food goes, a good parent offers a reasonably varied diet and attempts gentle encouragement to have it eaten, beyond that it depends on the child and that's luck of the draw.

My youngest is a fussy eater. He never used to be until he met a fussy eater in nursery who used to make fun of my sons fruit etc and be nasty about it and ever since then it’s been a struggle. Its unfair to say what you said because honestly some children will starve themselves if they don’t get X Y or Z. There’s a massive anxiety that comes with food issues and the more you try to force them to eat what you want the more their brain rejects the idea and then it turns into fussy-eating to actual food phobias... it’s not as easy as you may think....

CheshireChat

I may have been a bit sharp in my reply to you, apologies.

Yes it's very hard with a fussy eater. I gave up after a few years of trying every damn thing I could think of, charts, bribes, praising, ignoring etc. As she's gotten a bit older she'll try new things but it's a long, slow process.

As far as food goes, a good parent offers a reasonably varied diet and attempts gentle encouragement to have it eaten, beyond that it depends on the child and that's luck of the draw

Yes I agree with what you've said there^. Actually the best advice I was given was. "It's up to you to provide and serve healthy food for your child, after it's put on the table...that's it. You can't do any more than that".

Lemonnaise It's ok, it's an emotive subject and I should've been clearer.

I think one of the main reasons it's such a touchy subject it's that you have to deal with it at least 3 times a day and so much of our life revolves around food so there's no break and no getting away from it either.