To think sex as a parent is crap

[aliceinwonderglass]

My eldest (9 year old DD) has just walked in on me & DH in the middle of it.
We have 3 DC - DD1 (9), DD2 (7) and DS1 (7 months)
When the planets do finally align (i.e all kids are in bed, one of us isn't tired, we are both in the mood) and we manage to get a moment to ourselves, it is now interrupted by one of the kids barging through the door with "something to tell us".
AIBU to think that my sex life as a parent for the foreseeable future (i.e until all kids have grown & flown the nest) will be naff?

It's not just the interruption but realising that I've become the repulsive shagging parent.

Lock the door so you at least have some notice?

We only have locks on the bathroom doors I'm afraid. Perhaps we should try a quickie in the bathroom from now on? How depressing!

What did you do?? Say etc??

Err teach them to knock before entering! Why are they still awake?

My DH told her to get back to bed. He then chucked some shorts on & went through to see what she wanted.
I think we managed to obstruct her entry without scarring her for life but it's not the most romantic/sexy environment and certainly not an easy moment to recover from.

She was having a bad dream apparently.

YANBU. We have an ill 1yo at the moment who seems to be waking every 40 seconds. After settling him tonight we tried to have sex and got interrupted so much we just gave up in the end. And because my lovely DS is such a little nightmare no one will take him even for an hour, I'm not sure the next time we'll have sex properly and without worry.

Fit a lock to your bedroom door or barricade it well enough.

Ds (4, but with SN) tried to get in the other day, but couldn't get past the barricade, so we had time to compose ourselves.

Then he kept talking about us bouncing on the bed. Made us laugh, but killed moment.

Ha ha ha! Buy a bedroom door lock. We learned the hard way when our middle child walked in on us "having a tickle fight".

I'm holding out hope that one day the kids will be sleeping over at grannie's or somewhere and DH and I will actually be in the mood at the same time instead of one (or both) of us being too tired.

Your poor DD! Please get a lock on your door, that is traumatising for a child if they see anything.

Yanbu op. Sex as a parent is totally shit.

DH and I tried to seize moment this morning while both dc slept. 5 mins later DD wakes up and starts calling me. No she didn't come running in, but it still killed it.

Our sex life at the moment consists of the quickest of quickies before baby wakes up because I'm more than 3 inches away from her, or has to be planned for when we have a babysitter.

Kind of takes the magic away, doesn't it?!

Lock.

I say that. I haven’t gotten round to actually fitting a lock myself. But I keep meaning to.

DS (3) caught us early this morning. Sleepy shag that had hotted up a bit and we only noticed him when he piped up with 'Why is daddy under the bed?' (he meant the duvet)
DH took him back to his room and put him to bed. Told him he was looking for something. DS, who is a curious child, asked what. DH said his book which must have slipped under the duvet when he fell asleep last night.

Then DD (9m) woke up so that was that.
We are going to have another go in a bit after DD- who is awake again(!) goes to sleep.

Silent quickies.

If we’re lucky.

That is grim.

Get a bloody lock on your bedroom door FFS!

I don’t know anyone with a lock on their bedroom door!

Buy and lock and teach your DD to knock.

Get a simple hook and eye latch for the bedroom door, and start training them to knock- it will save your sanity.

You must have managed it somehow - she has 2 younger siblings

Our bedroom door locks, for all those who think no one has a lock on their bedroom door.

I remember my parents put a lock on their bedroom door when I was a child. Obviously didn't know why at the time but may have worked it out by now ;)

We are in a hotel for this very reason and the DCs are at Grandmas!! This is a rare event but it’s the only way of getting a decent shag!

Your poor DD! Please get a lock on your door, that is traumatising for a child if they see anything

Nah. Depends on how it is dealt with by the parents. Like most things. You can make it traumatising by your own reaction if you like.

OP, we are knockers in our house and it is something learnt from young. Maybe that would help if you are conscious of the little ones in the house?

most people don't have locks on bedroom doors though

They do if they want to have sex in private though.