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AIBU?

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Original poster

Paid off mortgage

332 replies

iwant2know · 16/01/2018 13:39

DH and I paid off our mortgage in November last year. We love our house, it's the perfect size for us and our 2 DSSs so we don't plan to move again.

We hadn't told anyone because it's no one else's business and we didn't want to come across as smug or up ourselves.

My dsis was over this morning and was in when a delivery person came to the door with flowers. I took them off the delivery person and put them on the coffee table and went back to the door to sign for them.

By the time I turned round Dsis had opened the card, which was from our bank congratulating us on paying off the mortgage. I didn't know they did this sort of thing.

Dsis got really upset, saying we should have told her, we hide this from her etc. For background she is older and has just started her mortgage after buying a house last year. She left shortly after.

I have just got back from lunch with a friend who I mentioned Dsis reaction to. She thinks we we're wrong not to tell people. We have acted like we have something to hide. Apparently everyone announces paying off their mortgages. It's a social niceity.

Aibu to think there is no hard and fast rule about this sort of thing? And we haven't done anything wrong.

OP posts:
MumsTheWordYouKnow · 17/01/2018 21:15

Excuse all the errors in my first post 🙈

MumsTheWordYouKnow · 17/01/2018 21:19

Ps congratulations 🎉 Also I think it’s the kind of news you tell people if you’re older and it’s expected, but certainly not if you’re younger as it’s rubbing salt in the wounds to others.

MrsSchadenfreude · 17/01/2018 21:26

I got booted off my bank’s Premier account when I paid off my mortgage as I no longer qualified!

listsandbudgets · 17/01/2018 21:38

Blimey your sister is on to something. Just think of all the potential for parties

Paid off mortgage - full on party for 100 complete with champagne and canapes and a personally guided tour of your home
Paid off car loan - Trip to the grand prix for you and 20 of your closest friends
Paid off other loan - good dinner for 30 at local restaurant of choice
Paid off overdraft - Bonfire and fireworks for whole neighbourhood - perfect opportunity to burn all those stroppy letters from the bank

I'm sure there must be many other such opportunities to celebrate... could be a business in it wonder if the bank will give me a business development loan

BarbaraofSevillle · 17/01/2018 21:50

All you people with no mortgages: make sure you keep your insurance up to date

Eh? What insurance? If you mean house or life insurance, the days of it being sold by your mortgage company at rip off prices are long gone.

HaudYerWheeshtBawbag · 17/01/2018 21:52

Each to there own, however I wouldn’t be telling anyone.

Sara107 · 17/01/2018 21:52

I've never heard anyone mention that they've paid off their mortgage - either it is not a social nicety or I don't know anybody who's done it! I got a little bit of inheritance which will pay of my own mortgage shortly, and I don't think I'll be sharing the news widely.

Pugsleypugs · 17/01/2018 21:57

I have absolutely no idea why you would tell people?! Your finances are no one else's business.

MumsTheWordYouKnow · 17/01/2018 22:05

Pugsley oh yes there are people who may do this, but they’re the ones with no social niceties Wink

MumsTheWordYouKnow · 17/01/2018 22:06

They like bragging, that’s why.

Dianag111 · 17/01/2018 22:10

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

meandmytinfoilhat · 17/01/2018 22:13

Why the fuck would you tell someone you've paid your mortgage off? What an odd thing for people to expect you to do.

RosieRuby · 17/01/2018 22:17

Firstly, congratulations! Secondly, she shouldn't have opened your card, that's just wrong. She is clearly jealous and is talking rubbish, you don't need to tell anyone, its a personal issue. What will she expect next, to know your bank balance in case she wants an interest free loan?

Plumsofwrath · 17/01/2018 22:55

tawdry and barbara

Haha - not a threat! When we paid off our mortgage I woke in the middle of the night about a week later, in a cold sweat, after a nightmare that our house had gone up in flames!

I’m not in the UK anymore. I know banks/building societies used to bundle insurance up with their loans. If they don’t do that anymore surely they make insurance a condition? Otherwise how do they protect their asset?

Sarahjo04 · 17/01/2018 22:57

It realy is nobody elses buisness and sounds to me as though your sister may be a bit jealous. In your friends defence I do feel as though she may have been trying 2 make u feel like u have nothing 2 be ashamed off....oh and by the way congratulations.x

nursy1 · 17/01/2018 23:00

Our next door neighbors paid off their mortgage when they sold their business. We only know because we were outside when they pulled up in their car all excited with a bottle of champers and said “come round”. I don’t think they told lots of people ( why would you). We were really happy for them.
Sounds like your sister feels a bit jealous - probably thinking about all the years she’s got to pay. Hopefully she will get herself under control and just be pleased for you.

Tapandgo · 17/01/2018 23:02

Never told anybody I paid my mortgage off ~ not their business. Weird pal and sister in my view. As for opening you card ~ wow!

How on earth can your financial affairs be any bodies business but yours?

Tapandgo · 17/01/2018 23:05

Leave a big letter lying around for her to read telling another ‘pal’ you’ve successfully remortgaged your home to help with bills .........
(If it bothers you that much)

travailtotravel · 17/01/2018 23:05

We hot our statement today. Less than 2 years to go. I'd better get some save the date cards or something so people are prepared for announcement.

In a parallel universe. I mean, wtaf if this is a thing.

No1WiseGuy · 18/01/2018 00:21

dsis is a jealouso

cheval · 18/01/2018 00:30

My car was sent a lovely bouquet of flowers via garage on first anniversary of me buying it. I was gutted. Thought they were from the b&&&&d boyfriend of the time. I’m sort of over it now..30 years

YesMam · 18/01/2018 04:45

Your sister over stepped the mark by opening your private card. Your financial news isn't any of her business, she should stay out of it.

SherbrookeFosterer · 18/01/2018 07:14

Given the housing crisis in the UK you are dead right to keep under your hat the fact you have paid off your mortgage, not least to avoid tricky situations of family and friends attempting to borrow money from you because they assume you have cash pouring out of every orifice, which will be inevitable from now on.

Congratulations btw!

Ceebs85 · 18/01/2018 07:17

I've never heard anything more ridiculous. Announcing it would cone across as smug. Surely no-one actually does this?!

Your sis is the only one in the wrong for opening private post. She's jealous and showing that it really is the green eyed monster.

burnoutbabe · 18/01/2018 07:23

I told people when I paid off my mortgage a few years ago, one of my most liked Facebook posts I think.
It's something to be proud of, just as much as anything else people do (like getting married or showing off what your kids do).
But there is no need to tell anyone if you have no desire to, I just don't see anything wrong with telling people if you have.