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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To wonder why this song is still ok to play on the radio

463 replies

CoedynSbageti · 14/01/2018 12:57

Jealous Guy

Written and performed by a man who admitted he was violent towards women.

Just that really.

OP posts:
ThePlatypusAlwaysTriumphs · 15/01/2018 21:24

Phew, finally RTFT!

So glad someone else mentioned Adele- every song that wummin has written suggests she needs help! The dc and I used to joke about that "Hello" one about his kids staring out the blinds going "dad, that crazy Adele Bird is out there again!" Yes, you must have called 1000x, Adele. And weirdly, he doesn't answer......

But you can find offence in anything. In the 70s my mum took offence at "Brown girl in the ring"!! and refused to let me listen to it! She thought the "ring" and the " show me a motion" were about something else entirely Grin

Alibobbob · 15/01/2018 21:27

Lady River Dee

What is it with the Police... Some of their songs are dodgy to say the least...

mrsharrison · 15/01/2018 21:30

Sting and the police. What disturbs me is that Sting was a schoolteacher. And then he went on to write Don't stand.

Accountant222 · 15/01/2018 21:32

Rod Stewart's tonight's the night- never hear that played anymore which is a good thing

Tinycitrus · 15/01/2018 21:35

It’s a beautiful song when you listen to it

Tinycitrus · 15/01/2018 21:38

Jealous guy I mean..

mrsBeverleyGoldberg · 15/01/2018 21:44

I don't think anyone does anything sexual to the girl in Does Your Mother Know. It's about the girl flaunting herself sexually at him and him saying she's too young, does your mother know? Go home, wash the make up off and do your homework.
Shell,
I wouldn't be able to listen to any music from my youth that a convicted paedophile made. Don't you think of all those lives he ruined when he sings? I would.

IfyouseeRitaMoreno · 15/01/2018 21:45

If her daddy's rich take her out for a meal
If her daddy's poor just do what you feel

Isn't that just 'poor girls are cheaper dates'? Or have I missed something?

Either way it's kind of crass, materialistic and has a transactional view of sex and love. She's poor so pay her less respect and the respect she deserves depends on her father's wealth.

Not saying it should be banned obvs but just it sucks as a worldview.

Amoregentlemanlikemanner · 15/01/2018 21:48

contemplates reading thread. Sags.

some funny comments though!

SlaaartyBaaardFaaast · 15/01/2018 22:07

@FuzzyCustard I love My Sharona by The Knack but I always feel very wrong singing along to those exact lyrics! Glad someone else noticed.

Xmaspuddingdisaster · 15/01/2018 22:11

Alibobbob I was really surprised at that lyric. It’s such a feel good type song overall, it seems such a weird thing to slip in there. I had thought maybe it was about a (male) friend he’d had a fight with but I think it’s clear it was a woman. Giving your girlfriend a scar is not something you can just regret in the same way as that woman you snogged at the office party... there’s no place for that in a song unless the “voice” is supposed to be an unsympathetic character.

Snowysky20009 · 15/01/2018 22:13

It's not about him being violent too his wife...::.::

EnthusiasmIsDisturbed · 15/01/2018 22:16

I’m sure some songs words are put in that rhyme and make sense and then the song takes on a different meaning

I doubt all of these songs are written from the heart or are a message to someone

I think some overthinking is going on

ImAGoner · 15/01/2018 22:24

*SadKitty86

"One of my favourite bands as a teenager is now a now go zone, after if came out that the lead singer was a pedo and was planning to rape a baby."
*
Shock** What band is that?!?!

MamaBishop89 · 15/01/2018 22:50

Do you also believe that Justin beier and Chris brows songs shouldn’t be played? What about that song by Rhianna and Eminem monster which directly talks about domestic violence?

mrsharrison · 15/01/2018 22:56

Love the way you lie by eminem and rihanna is grim listening.
But as someone who's experienced dv, it's the song that comes closest to my experience. I think it's a good piece of work and that songs should be about touching our emotions, even negatively.

Geordie1944 · 15/01/2018 22:59

When they make me world dictator, the first thing I will do is forbid the taking of offence on behalf of other people. Beethoven was a drunkard, a boor, didn't wash for weeks on end and so stank to high heaven, he regularly swindled his patrons and was abominably rude to people who tried to help him. He also wrote some of the most sublime music of all time - which doesn't excuse or mitigate the fact that he was in many respects a disgusting person, but, 250 years on, it makes it an irrelevance.

Jjpeston · 15/01/2018 23:09

The difference between Sting's Every Breath You Take (which people are saying is a stalkers anthem) and Lennon's Jealous Guy is that Jealous Guy is more likely to be fully autobiographical. I know the Sting song did come from personal experience - I think it was about his ex wife - but there's less evidence he was actually violent - I believe, correct me if I'm wrong.

One thing that does seem very wrong in this day and age - and I'm sure seemed very wrong in the 60s too is repeated domestic violence - which Lennon admits to. I'm not PC in the slightest but it does make me feel very uncomfortable to think of poor Cynthia Lennon and other of Lennon's partners when I hear this song. Especially as Lennon is more commonly remembered as a peace loving saint / genius.

mrsharrison · 15/01/2018 23:12

Yes sting said Every Breath was about his first wife. But he left her for trudie and frances was devastated. So he may have written it from frances point of view.

TinklyLittleLaugh · 15/01/2018 23:29

Sting seems a fairly blameless character though. I mean I'm not a big fan or anything but I've never read anything nasty about him. He's got a bit of a knack for giving his songs a strong voice, but that doesn't necessarily mean they're coming from a personal point of view.

Jjpeston · 15/01/2018 23:50

I suppose, like the current Woody Allen debate raging, it comes down to how much we believe the artist IS actually his work. Apparently Woodys diaries / writings make constant reference to under 18 year old girls. But many people (well, a lesser number these days) still appreciate his work. The Kevin Spacey thing is interesting in that it's a 'guilty before proven guilty' thing and his whole acting career is seemingly over. It's all a little inconsistent - hence the OPs initial question. It raises a lot of very interesting questions.

Graphista · 15/01/2018 23:56

My understanding of every breath was yes sting had an affair with trudie but still didn't want Frances to move on - typical bloke really.

Anyone that is a fan of the film copycat - the b-side (really showing my age now Blush) was murder by numbers - now THAT is a disturbing song!

Graphista · 15/01/2018 23:58

Have to say I've always thought woody Allen a creepy little slime ball I won't watch anything of his.

VictoriaOKeefe · 16/01/2018 00:05

To anyone familiar with the comedy of the mid-20th C (the joke is that there's actual very little alcohol in the drink) and how girls had to navigate a deeply patriarchal society where Good Girls weren't supposed to have sexual agency and needed excuses to stay for awesome consensual sex, Baby It's Cold Outside isn't a rape song, but then history is complicated and doesn't fit modern far-left propaganda.

nursy1 · 16/01/2018 00:29

Under My Thumb.Rolling Stones.
Don’t Stand so Close to me. Police
Young Girl. The Drifters

It’s not confined to the 60s and 70s. More recent one that really bothered me;
I don't care who you are
Where you're from
What you did
As long as you love me
Who you are
Where you're from
Don't care what you did
As long as you love me

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