To ask if you would re-marry your DP, knowing now what you didn't back then?

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I thought this would make for an interesting thread.--

If you could go back to the year you married your husband/wife, would you still marry them, knowing everything you do about them now that you didn't back then?

No absolutely not. Only been married almost 2 years & he's not the person I thought he was.

Big mistake & im trapped for the foreseeable future.

For me though that ship sailed along time ago

I was recently invited to my parents neighbour's wedding. The blushing bride was 72 years old!

My dh was my birth partner last week. During 36hr labour I bled, pissed and projectile vomited all over him. He didnt batter an eyelid. In labour all night and day he was knackered but more concerned with how tired I was. Once ds was out he stayed with me until bed time didnt even think about showering he just wanted to stay with us. Hes not perfect but kind, loving, supportive and pretty damn hot. Id marry him a million times over.

Been together for 10 years.

Probably, but I'd give it a lot more thought than I did the first time round. I was eager to get married because all my friends were married and it was "my turn". We'd been together for years, lived together already and it seemed like a natural progression. It basically never occurred to me that there could be better options.

15 years on all is fine. I do love him, but he pisses me off sometimes. To be honest though, I'm really not a people person and can't imagine living in close quarters with anybody and not getting pissed off with them. I was probably designed to live alone.

Ultimately, I've never met anybody I've liked better. So yeah...given the choice again I think I'd keep him.

No. But then I'm in the process of divorcing him.

I would have less hesitation

Difficult one.

If I had known about certain traits about him then I would’ve delved into them before committing. Somethings especially around parenting are difficult because obviously you don’t know until you have DC.
I do think having kids is a much bigger commitment than getting married though.

I wish I'd married sooner.
DP wanted to get married a good 6 years before I agreed to it.
DP is the perfect match for me even though we are opposites.
I can't quite believe it's been 27 years!

Although I love him very very much, do I think I would have been better suited to someone else? Yes, probably. However, we have a good life and he has many, many good points. There are things I would change about him though

Yep! We were together for ten years before we got married though (we met very young) so I had a fair idea of what I was letting myself in for.

I do recommend going through a couple of life-changing events with your partner to see how they step up when you need them. DH isn’t perfect (who is?) but I know I can rely on him.

I would have run down the aisle faster!

I told my DH about this thread yesterday.

Me: “There’s an interesting AIBU. AIBU to ask if you would re-marry your DP etc.”

Him: [very long pause]. “Yes, probably”

Me: “Probably?”

Him: “Oh no no no. I mean it’s probably unreasonable to ask. I’d definitely marry you again”.

So, I’m changing my answer. Yes, I’d marry him again but I do wish he’d stop taking everything so literally! It often causes confusion.

No. Fucking. Way. But to wish that wishes away the DCs.

I know DH would say the same.

100% yes, and if I'd had any sense whatsoever I'd have married him the first time we were together instead of splitting up and waiting 30 years, an abusive ex and four children before getting back together and getting married. I'd keep the children though!

In word - no!

Nope. Never.

I have no regret to have Donne so. I have two fantastic kids, i got the opportunity to retrain in a job i love.
But the man himself? Nope. I’m realising I walked into what should have been my own worst nightmare wo even seeing it. His personality and what make shim tick is so far form what is. Asking me tick that I actually wonder why on Earth I got married in the first place and how I could be so blind.

Yes as my beautiful daughter is a result of our marriage 😊

100% yes! We’ve been married for 14 years.

I probably wouldn't have married him as young as I did. 10 years on and now in my early 30s I feel like a very different person. I do love him and we get on very well, but I'm not "in love" and he is perhaps not the person I would choose to marry now, if o was choosing now as opposed to my early 20s.

Definitely not!

This is an impossible question for those with children. Most would not want to wish away their children, regardless of whether or not they should have married their father.....

No - I don't think i would. He's nice enough, but he's not anywhere near a soulmate or someone I would particularly miss if we weren't together. We just have different interests and expectations, but it's not bad, BAD, just not what it could be?

Although,, I wouldn't have my beautiful children and I could never imagine my life without them.

So, I suppose it's actually a yes.

Absolutely. He isn't perfect but neither am I and we are both better people for being together

If people took kids out of the equation and would always end up with the kids they have would you still say yes if you said yes because of the kids?