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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

CBB India

375 replies

Boyslikepinkgirlslikeblue · 05/01/2018 22:21

As a biological female I have experienced:
A c section
Pre eclampsia (nearly died)
Single motherhood, currently 90% of all single parents are female, the 10% of men are considered progressive and put on pedestals
Sexual assault, a few times and one horrific incident
I have HPV and have had a lot of smears, and 3 lots of my cervix chopped off, all "pre cancerous cells" have another one next month wish me luck
I've been a victim of domestic violence (strangled me until I was unconscious and broke three of my toes) he was charged with criminal damage, like that's unusual? I'm 32
I have had a period every single month since I was 11 years old

My Aibu is this. Am I being fucking unreasonable to think that India willoughby from CBB is taking this piss out of what being a biological female means, because she somehow in her brain thinks she is an actual woman? How? I don't wake up I the morning and think "ooh I feel so womanly, I need lipstick a dress and eye liner"
I wake up and get on with life, regardless if I have a period or not, because that's who I am, not because who I believe I am.
I understand people who can't cope with gender stereotypes, but reducing being a woman to looking pretty and clothing boils my blood

OP posts:
Deadlylampshade · 08/01/2018 12:48

Oh my god I’m just watching it now and the bit where India storms off because all the women are talking about sexism just says it all.
Then goes on about how they are bored of the women and want the men to come in now, gosh they have no shame.

Also I’d be so upset if that was my dad or ex husband saying how they were never attracted to women and that they’d been miserable their whole life. India doesn’t seem to show any sensitivity to other people at all.

Royalcoronation · 08/01/2018 12:51

India is an utter twat who has unfortunately managed to get the platform to be the example. Such a shame as I'm sure most trans people don't act like dicks.

Deadlylampshade · 08/01/2018 12:54

Oh do fuck off with the gendered souls crap Lyra it’s so unbelievably offensive to infer that the massive pile of repressive dog turd that is societal gender stereotypes are somehow innate. I am a woman because I am the class of human who can bear children, not because I have a lady brain so am better at doing all the shit jobs.
Its so regressive and sexist.

PersianCatLady · 08/01/2018 13:08

Another thing that I wonder about is at my GP surgery, men over 65 need to have scans for aortic aneurysms (not women).

Do people like IW still need these or do male only health problems no longer affect them?

FlyOnTheWindow · 08/01/2018 13:13

I wonder if IW would go out with a trans man. I want somebody to ask.

therealposieparker · 08/01/2018 13:15

According to a woman I know who has had to write the local community trans guidance, medical records are sealed. therefore there's no reason to suspect your GP will know that you're male/female. I mean sure there is... the usual checks like eyes and knowledge of biology, but TIMs will get cervical smear letters not prostate. Good luck to them all. Cancer and heart disease is not as important as misgendering you bigots.

SeekEveryEveryKnownHidingPlace · 08/01/2018 13:16

Fly good question.

My suspicion is that IW would say 'yes of course, why would I not' but in practice/in reality, needs the validation of a biological man of status to feel like a 'real woman'.

PatriarchyPersonified · 08/01/2018 13:20

I have no problems with transwomen and transmen, (I have worked with some over the years) and I respect their right to present and call themselves anything they want to.

However I do have issues with this kind aggressive nonsense propogated by some of the more robust trans activists in recent years. It sometimes feels like we are expected to believe two contradictory things. Most Trans activists will tell you that Gender and Sex are different things (I agree actually) and that gender is social construct unrelated to biology and caused by the society we live in and the way 'boys' and 'girls' are treated. I'm on side with this to a degree but then you get people like India who claim they have always known they are woman their entire life, despite having been brought up in society as a boy. They then go on to make the argument for gendered brains/souls etc. Trans activists seem to treat them both with equal seriousness but they surely both can't be true?

Also there are a lot of similarities in the 'social construct' argument between transgenderism and transracialism, if you take one seriously, you can't really dismiss the other.

FundayMorning · 08/01/2018 13:34

I will not be brainwashed by this shit.

I'm still laughing at the previous poster who said we should stop saying women are humans born with vaginas.

Grin
smileygrapefruit · 08/01/2018 13:43

As my DH said last night as part of quite a big conversation about the whole thing... "if I went in there in a gorilla costume and told everyone I was a gorilla should I be angry if some people didn't think I was a gorilla?"
We agreed that people should be able to do what makes them happy but India is not a real woman, she is a trans woman and that's absolutely fine. She's not a very nice person though. People would be much more understanding and accepting if she didn't just keep banging on about it, live and let live.

OneFlewOverTheDodosNest · 08/01/2018 14:03

India is a dick really, I mean who thinks they're going to be forgiven for scream at a woman in that way on live TV? Most women would be VERY aware of the fact it's going to make them look like a "screeching harpy" and most men would realise it makes them look like a thug. India appears to have missed both messages.

I think there's a lot of truth in a PP's guess that India's colleagues have convinced India to go on CBB "for publicity" whilst realising that it's the perfect way to ensure the world realises how vile India is.

Aeroflotgirl · 08/01/2018 14:12

I feel that gender is both nature and nurture. There might be a biological explanation for the gender disphoria (be it hormonal, genetic etc) Our genetics are largely responsible for how we feel in the sex that we are born with.

However I question how genuine are these transwomen? Do they really believe that they have been born in the wrong body, or are they wanting the best of both worlds, especially the ones that do not go through with sex reassignment surgery. Do they want to be a man one day, and a woman the next when they get bored. It certainly seems like that with some of the trans men and women.

busyboysmum · 08/01/2018 14:20

India is not a woman. She never was and never will be.

What she is, and what everyone is perfectly willing to accept is that she's a transwoman, with her own unique set of views and experiences and has every right to live that way in peace and happiness, supported as an equal.

This

And it amazes me that anyone would want to morph into a middle aged woman and expect men to be falling all over them (!) Any middle aged woman could have told her it's now we become invisible. After decades of being harassed by men it's a complete relief to this middle aged woman Grin

RosiePosiePuddingPie · 08/01/2018 14:20

However I question how genuine are these transwomen? Do they really believe that they have been born in the wrong body, or are they wanting the best of both worlds, especially the ones that do not go through with sex reassignment surgery. Do they want to be a man one day, and a woman the next when they get bored. It certainly seems like that with some of the trans men and women.

Well this is the crux of my issue with the GRA, and many many others'.

Aeroflotgirl · 08/01/2018 14:25

Exactly, are some of these transactivists really genuine, or are they playing dress up, and jumping on a bandwagon wanting the attention and limelight. In god knows how long, they will be back to being men again, as all this womaning will probably become boring.

WaggyMama · 08/01/2018 14:29

After decades of being harassed by men it's a complete relief to this middle aged woman

yes yes yes.

ManicUnicorn · 08/01/2018 14:31

India is a twat. Its come to something when I find myself siding with Ann Widdecombe over someone else. To quote someone I used to know, India doesn't have a chip on her shoulder she has a potato field.

Pisstaker · 08/01/2018 14:48

When she was stood in front of the other women,creaming her breasts saying that to her they are 'just a body part, like an arm' says a lot. I don't think many women view their breasts like they do their arms.This is because she isn't a woman. She hasn't been through puberty had periods and grown breasts.She made herself look like a woman on the outside.

Glowerglass · 08/01/2018 15:11

LyraPotter, if you were not born with a vagina and xx chromosome then you are not a woman.

It's a fact.

BatShite · 08/01/2018 15:12

India has been fascinating watching. Utter narcissist and victim complex..rare to see that in full. I cannot stand them. And their drag phobia is bollocks. On tonights show Andrew does drag and India sits foaming about it Grin

BatShite · 08/01/2018 15:14

I'm disgusted that channel 5 have included India in year of the woman

It was including India in the 'all female launch' that really pissed me off.

BatShite · 08/01/2018 15:19

Isn't it amazing that Courtney Act said 'I wasn't socialised as a woman so I won't pretend to understand the real issues that women face', yet India insists she's the peak of womanhood and more woman than actual women?

Courtney/Shane is such a lovely person. Complete opposite to India and Indias mememememememememe

BeyondWW · 08/01/2018 15:23

India in CBB, no problem. Apart from India being an arsehole.
India in the all female launch? False advertising. Factually.

Whinesalot · 08/01/2018 15:54

What she is, and what everyone is perfectly willing to accept is that she's a transwoman, with her own unique set of views and experiences and has every right to live that way in peace and happiness, supported as an equal.
Totally. I can also see why she's desperate to be accepted as a real woman but then she should also be able to understand that whilst that may be possible for some people, it isn't always as easy for all people, especially the older generation.

Aeroflotgirl · 08/01/2018 17:20

India is not and never be a real woman, as she was not born biologically Female. Same if I changed myself to become male, I am not a real man as I was not born biologically male.

India is a transwoman, which is the accurate description for her.