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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To say bras are not for boys

573 replies

AssignedPuuurfectAtBirth · 01/01/2018 13:50

Another trans bully nightmare. Targetting the yellowberry bra brand now

lilymaynard.wordpress.com/2017/12/31/bra-gate-yellowberry-products-now-for-everyone/

When will this BS end?

OP posts:
UpABitLate · 02/01/2018 15:09

It's quite clear that a large part of this is a pushback to women and girls being able in only very recent history, in only very small parts of the world, to talk more openly about their biology and the impacts of it, and the effects of male violence especially male sexual violence on them.

The biology thing is just disgusting and who wants to hear it and anyway women should put up and shut up - so isn't it handy that there is a way to get women to stop talking about it all.

Talking about male violence esp male sexual violence and it's prevalence and consequences for women and girls upsets quite a lot of men and furthermore it's mean. Women and girls used to be better sports about this stuff and not go on about it, and when it was serious they were rightly too embarrassed to mention it. They have started now and it's just all very unpleasant and they need to stop. Muddying the waters around who is doing what to who, and the stats as well, should have the effect of shutting them up quite nicely.

Aeroflotgirl · 02/01/2018 15:11

I like to buy products specific to my gender actually, I like a nice flowery and lacy bra, and I want underwear for designed for women (despite my y font fetish). I like ladies jeans designed for a female body. as they fit better, whereas men's ones hang and don't look flattering. But that does not stop me buying products for the opposite sex. I like men's t shirts, so despite the advertising and marketing, I walk into Topman and buy them. Being gender specific, is not going to stop somebody purchasing the product.

Are we expecting men;'s clothing to be more neutural! Of course not, its just targeted at Female clothing, and the need to deconstruct the Female gender, to make it neutural. This is being done by what are biological males, you don't find Females doing this, or transmen. Just because you dress like a woman, does not make you one, they still have their bullying misogenistic ways, that disrespect women, and trample on their identity. This is happening right here. What with the women only stream becoming open to men now, because of a few vocal minority like this, and the incidence with the lady who asked for a female nurse for a smear test, who got a man (transwoman) instead.

LizzieSiddal · 02/01/2018 15:11

I don't see the need for sanpro to be advertised as 'for women', if it was advertised as period protection then again it would describe the use of the product and people who have periods would still buy it.

Gosh what a great idea! I suggest you go and get in touch with all the ad agencies who’ve been doing things so wrong for decades. How stupid of them! As I said upthread, the ads should just be full of men and trans women. They’d sell much more I expect. Hmm

Ereshkigal · 02/01/2018 15:11

The biology thing is just disgusting and who wants to hear it and anyway women should put up and shut up - so isn't it handy that there is a way to get women to stop talking about it all.

Yes, very much so.

Gileswithachainsaw · 02/01/2018 15:12

Ideally we'd solve problem 1 as well, but until then fixing some words on option 3 solves that problem for trans girls and doesn't take anything away from other girls

And I ask again, how are the target market meant to find them when the very words they would use are eliminated from the site and stop it even coming up on a search?

MaisyPops · 02/01/2018 15:13

Pubescent and post-pubescent human females have breasts.
Breasts come in a range of shapes and sizes but the are part of being a biologically female human being.

Sure, if a man/boy wants to put a bra on then i couldn't care less.

HOWEVER, what bothers me about the trans activism element is I can see groups of trans fundamentalists putting pressure on companies to design bras to accomodate a male figure on the grounds of 'boohoo i'm a real woman and it hurts me feelings for bras to be designed to fit actual biological women who have actual boobs'. What is worrying is that a few yeara ago I'd never have thought that but now Lily/Liam person seems to think that a biological man will be able to have a womb transplant and be pregnant because pregnancy has fuck all to do with biology. So who knowd any more.

Ereshkigal · 02/01/2018 15:13

So should the marketing etc refer to growing chests, to please FTMs who don't like thinking that they have breasts?

UpABitLate · 02/01/2018 15:13

"shouts about how they are girls/female/daughters all over their website."

Wow.

So having a company for a product aimed at pubescent girls is "shouting" is it?

Just mentioning women / girls equates to going on and on and on and on and on. This is like when men say feminism has "gone too far" or when they identify a group which is 1/3 female as 50/50 and a group that is 50% female as "female dominated".

And FWIW the choice is not "sexy padded" or this outlet. Many retailers in the UK sell non sexy non padded starter bras / vest tops and the like.

Tell you what, why don't you write to Gillette about their "best a man can get" tagline, and complain that they use the word men in their advertising.

UpABitLate · 02/01/2018 15:15

here's the website here

It even SHOUTS at the top "The best a MAN can get" before it even says anything else! So non inclusive! So offensive!

Off you go Smile

Ereshkigal · 02/01/2018 15:15

And FWIW the choice is not "sexy padded" or this outlet. Many retailers in the UK sell non sexy non padded starter bras / vest tops and the like.

YY. You can go onto any high street and get one.

UpABitLate · 02/01/2018 15:16

"Revel in Gillette’s unparalleled shaving technology with the Gillette Fusion ProShield men’s razor, the first Gillette razor to shield while you shave"

OH MY FUCKING GOD

loopsdefruit · 02/01/2018 15:16

giles funny that, cause Yellowberry came up first in searching for 'first bras' and third in searching for 'bras for teens' without actually having to include the word girl or woman. If they changed the wording then it might come up even quicker. It didn't come up at all without searching specifically for US results though, so maybe a UK company doing similar things would work better.

upabit it doesn't, but it's likely to create dysphoric feelings in a trans man or nonbinary person who has periods, because they do not wish to be seen as feminine necessarily.

Obviously the period itself can often be dysphoric, and will continue to be when huge amounts of society refuse to stop shouting about how periods mean you're a woman.

If biology becomes more accepted as being just a part of gender identity, more people might feel comfortable in their body without needing to medically transition.

UpABitLate · 02/01/2018 15:17

PLease also do something about this disgusting wiki page:

gross

"male genitalia" in the opening line FFS would it hurt them to be more inclusive?

Ereshkigal · 02/01/2018 15:17

It even SHOUTS at the top "The best a MAN can get" before it even says anything else! So non inclusive! So offensive!

Yes, shouldn't the much more vocal and aggressive MTF campaigners be backing up their trans "brothers" in calling for them to change it?

Stickystickstick · 02/01/2018 15:18

I’m looking forward to the new Sanpro adverts. They’ll be full of trans women, because we won’t be allowed to say periods are a “woman” thing hmm

I’ve already been pulled up on twatter for saying I was having ‘women’s issues’ & hated having my very painful period because a) not all women have periods (and some men have periods (!) and b) I am cis-privileged to have periods in the first place. The fact I’m doubled over in pain, vomiting, anaemic and on codeine to cope with them is a real privilege.

We already get polices over terming biological things as women’s :(

AssignedPuuurfectAtBirth · 02/01/2018 15:19

I don't really need to wear a bra for support but I have v obvious nipples and I wear a t shirt bra to stop men looking at my tits. Because it's horrible. Fucking makes me mad that people are saying they are 'just clothes'. No they are fucking not and boys don't get men staring at their chests or find it difficult to do sport because of large breasts.

FFS, what the fuck is wrong with some women who ALWAYS put the needs of men first?

OP posts:
Ereshkigal · 02/01/2018 15:20

If biology becomes more accepted as being just a part of gender identity, more people might feel comfortable in their body without needing to medically transition.

Hahaha it won't be, ever. Because it's a ridiculous and harmful idea.

Gileswithachainsaw · 02/01/2018 15:20

loop other erase the word from everything then we no lo get exist and wtf are they transition from or to?

Bloody PC'ing themselves out of their own existence.

Thehairthebod · 02/01/2018 15:20

and will continue to be when huge amounts of society refuse to stop shouting about how periods mean you're a woman.

But periods do mean you are a woman. By definition. Confused

MaisyPops · 02/01/2018 15:21

Stickystickstick
That's because people who don't get basic biology are talking garbage.

Now a TRANSMAN may still have periods because they are a biologically a woman.

These people are idiots.

BarbarianMum · 02/01/2018 15:21
UpABitLate · 02/01/2018 15:21

They are coming up first probably because they are in the news

And still only if you put USA in....

Jesus.

Do you have children? Do you go to childrens clothes shops? I had zero trouble whatsoever purchasing something neither padded nor "sexy" for my DD when it was time.

Padded "sexy" bras for young girls are the exception not the norm which is why they are in the news when they are produced eg everyone remembers that Primark one.

The idea that pubescent girls in the UK as standard wear "cleavage enhancing" "sexy" padded bras is bonkers and like something from the imagination of someone like woody allen TBH.

Thehairthebod · 02/01/2018 15:23

I think it might be time for this:

To say bras are not for boys
loopsdefruit · 02/01/2018 15:23

ereshkigal out of interest, at what age will my opinions be acceptable and not a sign of me 'being young'? When I'm 30, when I have children, when I agree with you?

I am pleased that young people are more accepting, and that young people are starting companies and getting careers and moving in to places of power to change things for the better, but then there are plenty of people older than me who agree with me so I don't think it's an age thing. I also don't think I'm that young.

LizzieSiddal · 02/01/2018 15:24

Love that TheHair, thanks for posting.