To call out my vegan friend?

[rubbishtalker]

I haven't known her very long, a few years. She is a work colleague. She is 'vegan' on social media, lots of photos and hash tagging and "cruelty free" style comments.

But a few months ago when we went out for a team lunch she ate pork. I've seen her eat cheese, chocolate etc before.

AIBU to comment something along the lines of ' I love how you see vegan meals as a healthy aspect to your current diet'?? I am starting to find it irritating.

Being truly vegan is hard to do. I find it incredibly easy being vegetarian but vegan is harder - so I try to make the vegan choice when it's there, but no way would I describe myself as vegan, so long as my hens produce eggs I'll never be one. But I do see that there's vast amounts of cruelty in the dairy/egg industry so hats off to those who go the whole vegan route.

But this would piss me off. I recall going to an event and some bloke claiming he was vegetarian because he only ate chicken. I said something like 'oh those feathery plants with legs then?'. You shouldn't claim to be something you're not, it just makes the people who are doing it look less credible.

Why is your attempt "better than nothing"? I make no attempt and I don't see you as being "better" or "worse"than me. You might want to cut out all animal products but i don't - I only judge those who don't practise what they preach.

Why is your attempt "better than nothing"? I make no attempt and I don't see you as being "better" or "worse"than me. You might want to cut out all animal products but i don't - I only judge those who don't practise what they preach

Because the planet cannot sustain dairy and meat-eating forever- it has a gigantic environmental impact- much more so than car pollution. Therefore, it is better than nothing to cut down on meat and dairy consumption if you are concerned about the environment, even if you do not go totally vegan.

Wrong choice of words but if I have decided to try and go vegan for my own reasons surely anything I manage is good? Even if it’s not a perfect vegan life style?

Btw I am not preaching and my family are all meat eaters by their choice.

Is it possible that your colleague has had ‘food issues?

That’s one of the reason I wouldn’t be comfortable trying to be vegan. I’d be too afraid that it would restart the restrictive behaviour (in a socially acceptable way).

So say, i think farming has a bad impact on the planet so I'm cutting down on meat and dairy and all the other shit I do that's bad for the planet. Fine.

That would just make you look petty. If you want to be petty do it properly. Next time you have a works lunch take a picture of her with her food (e.g. A group photo, tell her/people next to her to stay seated while everyone else goes behind) then post it and tag her.

She definitely says she's vegan? Only a friend of mine who's a very good cook will tag pl

Hit post too soon, sorry.

My friend has a blog and will tag recipes with what they are, so sometimes things are tagged vegan/paleo etc so people can find them. They are mixed in with plenty of recipes with meat, eggs and cream though

I eat meat and dairy but I’m under no illusions that the meat and dairy industries and cruelty free. She probably has a lot of valid points about the cruelty of factory farming. We should all think more about exactly how our food is produced.

Havent RTFT yet but wtf is up with some of you??!

Veganism is one of the only things people demand 100% commitment from at all times....why??

If someone is doing their best and occasionally slips up I have a lot more respect for them than those who don't bother thinking about it at all.

Recycling is a good comparison...
I recycle everything I can, and call myself eco friendly.
If I slip up one day and throw something recyclable in the bin....should I immediately stop bothering trying to recycle anything at all?
Should I stop calling myself eco friendly?
Would you all leap on me and "call me out" as a heinous planet destroyer?

Or do we accept that 95% recycling is a damn sight better than 75/50/0%??

So say, i think farming has a bad impact on the planet so I'm cutting down on meat and dairy and all the other shit I do that's bad for the planet. Fine.

Exactly. I guess though that in order to do so, you have to use vegan recipes and ask for vegan menus and buy food normally designated for vegans. Therefore, there is bound to be some confusion and people may confuse that for being preachy or being a fake vegan.

Because vegan is a complete state. It’s a label which means I do not consume animal products. Eating vegetarian/ vegan food sometimes or even frequently is very common for a carnivore. But you’re still a carnivore if you’re on the pork

Also it’s fashionable at the moment and makes me think of people who watched what the health, couldn’t see what a load of nonsense it was and jumped on the bandwagon

The only way people could confuse it for being preachy is if... people are preachy! I have two very close friends who are "vegan". One is preachy, the other isn't. Both wear leather, take a lot of long-haul flights and drive cars. One comes across as a huge hypocrite, the other is just doing their thing.

I can understand your irritation as I would be rolling my eyes at her as well....but there's no way I'd call her out on social media because her choices are really none of my business. I'd scroll past any preachy stuff and pay no heed and let her get on with it.

All this crap people on here are spouting about how she's not a vegan and has no right to call herself one....you ought not to to take this stuff so seriously...seriously. We all lapse from our principles from time to time in one way or another...all of us. Veganism isn't like some holy grail of purity that separates the wheat from the chaff, however highly you think of yourself for being one. Chill the hell out and let people be infallible as they are, as you are, as we all are.

I'm a healthy eater, as in I generally stay away from junk food and sweets, eat a lot of fresh food including fruit and veg, pulses and wholegrains etc...but every now and then I have something that isn't all that good for me just because I fancy it. I'm still a healthy eater despite that and if anyone tried to tell me otherwise, or take a photo of me with a bag of chips, I'd think them an utter arsehole and thereafter completely disregard them...it's none of their business and not for them to call me out on. The only person I answer to in that respect is myself.

If you want to be vegan, be vegan. If you want to cut down on animal products and still eat meat every once in a while, go for it.

If you at any point willingly use animal products (I won't include eggs from your own well kept backyard chickens, but I know this is contentious) then you are not a flipping vegan. You have absolutely no right to lecture anyone else on their choices, it's just hypocritical.

* That might be the only time she's eaten pork. Better to eat vegan 90% of the time than not at all.*

You can't identify as a vegan when you keep breaking the rules because they're hard if you are not one then you are something else. If you really must have a label then 'Flexitarian' is the new one being bandied around isn't it? Dp and I have cut down on meat so we have it less than once a week at home and only occasionally when we're out, we just call it 'eating what we like' and don't judge people for their choices. Every dietary decision doesn't needs bloody label, it's pure virtue signalling.

Well it is rape in a form.

FFS. Women (and men) are raped. Animals aren't.

FFS.

I think everyone should pay a visit to their local farm, see first-hand what goes on and form an opinion from what they see directly. Next, if you wish to continue consuming dairy, choose your source. The scale of farming has a big impact i.e. large factory farms, vs. small organic.

Everyone has a right to choose what they do and don't consume. I personally prefer to eat meat and dairy, but will source as much from the UK as possible. At least with Red Tractor marks etc. you have some confidence in the welfare of that animal. US meat, to pick one, will be a lot more intensively reared.

It is easy to play out-of-sight, out of mind with many replacement ingredients. How much land is cleared to fuel the demand for 'healthy' alternatives? For example palm oil is a horrific industry - the cruelty to wild animals is far an above more damaging than that to UK pastoral animals.

For pescatarians who think fish have no feelings, have a look at the fish that come off a trawler. Hauled up from deep enough, there will be a fair few who's swim bladders have expanded so much on the way up, they protrude from their mouths - hardly comfortable and they die by suffocation in effect. (Sorry I support vegans, vegetarians and all those in between, but pescatarians who don't consider fish as animals or meat wind me up).

What a bunch of self-righteous posts - very depressing to read.

Someone who is trying 100% of the time, and succeeding 90% of the time, to avoid meat fish and diary, is a fucking better human being - given that we're being judgemental and claiming the high moral ground on this thread - than people who say 'oh i love my roast dinner me' and who are wilfully blind to the horrors of the meat and dairy industry.

We all aspire to things we fail at. When we are trying something new, we post and talk alot about it; there are going to be many of you who will say, shortly, 'i'm on a diet...' and then tuck into something you ideally wouldn't want to eat. And on MN people will rally to you and say 'start again tomorrow, don't be too hard on yourself' blah blah.

Veganism and vegetarianism are inflammatory subjects because we all know that we should not be eating meat/dairy; we are all flawed human beings for fuck sake, and not one of us has the high moral ground despite many of you trying to claim it.

Both wear leather, take a lot of long-haul flights and drive cars.

Well firstly, neither are vegan if they wear leather.

Secondly, what does flying and driving have to do with being vegan?

So true in my opinion

I think the reason people are nasty to those with a diet very low but not 100% free from meat or dairy is because at least they are trying, and for some reason that offends. And it really does offend.

I wouldn't agree trying to be vegan is better violets you make that statement like fact. Your plants don't grow everywhere, the environmental cost of increased food miles (bet very little of it is British), agrochemicals, farm machinery, cost to wildlife destruction etc.

It's all virtue signalling bollocks, you are better with local sourced products, from ethical farms, better yet where the animals are fed on seaweed, or an insect based diet. Arable farming leaves local nature barren, animal farming allows for hedgerows, natural pasture and waterways for wiildlife when done well. Don't tell us your way is "better" without really looking at it.

And as for flexitarians do it or don't do it and shut up about it! I'd call her out in person. Social Media will just make you look equally insane.

Secondly, what does flying and driving have to do with being vegan?

yeah I'm wondering this too. Might have to self-report to the vegan police.

Blue I would think it is that vegans like to bang on about the environmental impact which they don't understand and flying and driving are totally avoidable yet have a serious impact. Well flying anyway, driving more tricky!

You don't need to go abroad, you do need to eat.

Secondly, what does flying and driving have to do with being vegan?

Can you really not work it out from the posts on this thread? People going vegan because of the environmental impact of meat and dairy farming not ringing any bells?