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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To agree that engagement announcements on Christmas day are irritating

171 replies

InspMorse · 25/12/2017 22:05

Friend has just phoned. I agreed to post this on here for her to see what the general consensus is.

She has been with extended family all day. She had been looking forward to catching up with Mum/Dad family and celebrating Christmas with them as they she lives a good distance away from home.
Sister was there with boyfriend (they live near parents) and announced as soon as they arrived at the Mum & Dad's that boyfriend had proposed/ they had got engaged this morning. Apparently the WHOLE day has been about them. Non stop wedding talk.
Are we BU to think that combining family celebrations/ Christmas with personal announcements are a PITA? A bit like announcing one's own engagement at someone else's B'day party?
Friend is prepared to hear that SIBU but I get her point entirely.

OP posts:
WildRosesGrow · 26/12/2017 21:40

SIBU Christmas Day is often when families meet up as a group so it is an ideal time to share exciting news, like an engagement.

Last year, some of our relatives told everyone they were expecting their second child on Christmas Day, I think we all thought it was lovely, rather than somehow attention seeking. They did wait until a bit later in the day but think it would have been fine first thing too.

PoorYorick · 26/12/2017 21:40

Heh, the more bollocks I read on here the more I realise MN is its own world. MN says that nothing is more insulting and offensive than buying chocolate for your work Secret Santa...almost everyone in my office got chocolate in some form, including me, and everyone was happy. MN has a thread about turning up for hotel breakfast in pyjamas and within minutes there's nothing more uptight and joyless and social climbing than putting jeans on before you go for a Travelodge meal. I saw a thread once where hysterical Hyacinth Buckets argue over whether a birthday card that says "Mother" on it is 'common'.

Bitter MNer starts an attempted bitchfest about someone who's got nothing to do with her announcing her engagement on Christmas Day and suddenly that's the biggest social faux pas in history. God forbid people be happy about engagements, God forbid they announce it on the one day of the year the family's all together and the only person they're celebrating is long dead and would have blessed the occasion anyway.

I love it here for all sorts of reasons but I long since gave up expecting it to be any kind of normal window on society. Time to start channeling the Cheshire Cat. We're all mad here.

ClaryFray · 26/12/2017 21:44

YABU it's a time people come together and celebrate. Baby news too

MaisyPops · 26/12/2017 21:47

Announcing an engagement or pregnancy at Christmas makes sense. It's unreasonable to say people shpuldn't announce because it's Christmas.

However, blabbering about your wedding or baby chat for hours on end is just annoying and attention seeking. Hours of 'lets yalk about me' chat would bug the life out if me because it sort of says 'my life is so much more interesting than everyone else's'

Original poster
InspMorse · 26/12/2017 21:49

You sound very angry PoorYorick
Xmas Grin

OP posts:
PoorYorick · 26/12/2017 22:00

I wish I had a pound for every time someone on MN said I sounded angry, I could buy and sell the whole website. This is just my tone of voice, you should see my resting bitch face.

But I'm not the one starting online bitchfests about people I don't know getting engaged, so heya.

Original poster
InspMorse · 26/12/2017 22:01

Xmas Grin @ PoorYorick

OP posts:
Original poster
InspMorse · 26/12/2017 22:02

& R E L A X - it's only a chat forum after all!

OP posts:
PoorYorick · 26/12/2017 22:06

Just emojis on repeat, and not even different ones? I am disappoint. Usually when people take to the internet to slag off people unknown to them but whose life decisions offend them, they at least have something prepared. This is just lazy.

I guess you were hoping the hive mind would do the work for you. To be fair, you were right.

Original poster
InspMorse · 26/12/2017 22:21

Are you drunk?!

OP posts:
PoorYorick · 26/12/2017 22:38

No.

I just really, really, really don't like online bitchfests about people who've done nothing wrong and who the OP barely knows from Adam. They're just so spiteful.

I don't feel strongly enough about it to start my own thread on the subject (seriously, this was that important to you?) but if I stumble across one, yeah, I might give you my opinion since you asked.

Original poster
InspMorse · 26/12/2017 22:51

and who the OP barely knows from Adam
Eh? I am the OP and have known my friend, her sister and her family all my life. I've also known her sister's new fiancé for 15 years.

You're far too interested for someone so disinterested Yorick

OP posts:
TheStoic · 26/12/2017 22:52

Oh my GOD some people must find life very hard! Imagine being pissed off at your own sister’s engagement talk.

I hope for your friend’s sake her sister gets married as soon as possible! Extended wedding talk may push her over the edge.

Oh, but then she might have kids. I hope she doesn’t announce any pregnancies on inconvenient dates!

I think your friend should go NC as of now. It’s the only way.

Weebo · 26/12/2017 22:55

I think Yorick is the most sensible person on this thread tbh.

BathshebaKnickerStickers · 26/12/2017 22:56

My DH proposed when he was ready to- which was a random Friday afternoon in August. We’ve been together 20 years

PoorYorick · 26/12/2017 22:58

The fact that you likened someone announcing an engagement at Christmas to announcing it at a birthday party shows just how very determined you are to see your sister's friend as a caaah, for reasons you should probably keep to yourself. The fact that you've posted this bitchfest for 'opinions' and are now slagging off someone who responds as 'too interested' shows what 'opinions' you were looking for.

Spiteful. Just spiteful.

But she's engaged and happy.

Lweji · 26/12/2017 23:01

I think Yorick is the most sensible person on this thread tbh.

I wouldn't go as far as that, but Yorick is not wrong.

Weebo · 26/12/2017 23:02

I hope she doesn’t announce any pregnancies on inconvenient dates

Indeed - Like a dull Wednesday although I'm sure MS (moany sister) could find something to be pissed off about.

'I bought a treacle tart for everyone and not one person mentioned it. All they could talk about was the baby. Whaaa...'
'

Weebo · 26/12/2017 23:04

Your post was very sensible too, Lweji. Xmas Grin

Xmasbaby11 · 26/12/2017 23:04

Yabu - it's an obvious time to announce it, when everyone's together.

However, wedding plans are boring! Never a good time to discuss those for hours.

Original poster
InspMorse · 26/12/2017 23:05

Yorick
Has this thread touched a nerve?
You seem to be the only person raging about the situation. Very odd.

OP posts:
MaisyPops · 26/12/2017 23:06

TheStoic
I can only speak for myself, but I have zero issue with an engagement announcement and a bit of wedding chatter. But if my whole christmas day became non stop wedding talk then i'd find it annoying (and a bit rude just like if someone talked non stop about their plans for their allotment or kept bringing the conversation back to how awesome their children are).

TheStoic · 26/12/2017 23:09

Unless the sister was performing some kind of monologue, everyone else seems to have been involved in the conversation and could have changed it at any time. Presumably they were excited and enjoying themselves!

Poor OP’s friend. My thoughts are with her at this difficult time. :-(

Lweji · 26/12/2017 23:10

But if my whole christmas day became non stop wedding talk then i'd find it annoying (and a bit rude just like if someone talked non stop about their plans for their allotment or kept bringing the conversation back to how awesome their children are).

We don't know who kept the wedding conversation going.

From the OP
She had been looking forward to catching up with Mum/Dad family
She did. I bet the engagement was the only news worth talking about for them.

For the rest, there are phones and skype. They can catch up any time they like.

Weebo · 26/12/2017 23:10

I heard Yorick announced her engagement on Christmas day by riding into her parents street on a reindeer-driven sleigh wearing a wedding dress shouting 'LOOK AT ME!!!'