Being called a 'fucking slut' at Tesco

[pourmeanother]

WTAF?

A few hours ago, I went to my local Tesco superstore with my 3 DC (3,5,7).

V v busy in car park. Circled the P&C parking slots a few times as always get free after a while. Sure enough, after just 1 min 2 spaces look like getting freed...

So - as per diagram (I know you luvs them 🤗) I was clearly waiting at the little junction with indicator on. Only for a few secs. No one behind me. Not bothering anyone.

Car come out of space I show in diagram I go into. Meanwhile, TwatMan approaches in car. All the while, my indicator is on. It's obvious what's going on.

He waits, as I do, while we wait for the car to come out of the space and as soon as the car has passed me, I nip left, do a turn and I'm in the space.

Bear in mind, car goes past TwatMan. He couldn't get past her. It was obvious for me to get in there first as I had space. And had been waiting.

So I did.

He got a space in the next second in a space v v near.

As he left his car , while I got out my 3 DC he shouted for my attention. 'Oy' 'Oy you'.

I ignored him, thinking, seriously, this twat cant be for real.

My 3 DC came out of the car and I looked over to him because he wasn't giving up.

He shouted, 'You went right in front of me then.'

(I didn't - he should have seen I was going to move at the same time as the other car)

Then - I couldn't believe this - he picked his little girl out of her car seat and screamed at me 'FUCKING SLUT'.

I was incredulous. Fight or flight. So I shouted back at him, 'Happy Christmas too, love'.

As I walked into the store with my 3 little DC , he walked next to me, carrying his little girl. I told him he needed help. He was acting like a psycho and I felt so sorry for his poor child.

I actually just dribbled stuff because I was shitting myself for me and the kids. Like I said, fight or flight. I could hear my voice was all over the place.

During my bits when I said 'poor poor child' and that I'd be calling the police if he carried on, he said I was 'all passive aggressive!

That set my blood cold. You can just imagine the home dynamic. Poor soul who has to live with him.

I can't tell you - he was totally horrendous.

I know IANBU.

I just needed to vent.

Poor child. She's gonna have to grow up with that as a father figure.

This is what I learned when I took my driver's test.

It wasn't "his space" either. She was there first she was sitting there waiting for it. He didn't have right of way unless the car park was marked.

little concerned that so many drivers think he has right of way on unmarked road.

If she got to the junction well before him, then I agree it was her space.
Applying "right of way" in the scenario where they are both stopped and waiting, and she got their first, is too pedantic.

It's not really a junction though, it's a carpark that has it's own set of rules. It's not a public road.

Most carparks are one-way for a lot of them, and you often only turn in one direction. I would assume OP was waiting to turn left, not waiting for a space.

But that doesn't mean TwatMan wasn't in fact, a twat. He certainly was.

I'd be calling the police if he carried on

Carried on with what? Clearly he shouldn't have shouted at you like that but you seem to have been the one carrying on

Well you were in the wrong taking his space. Don't do things like this and you won't annoy people. There's too much of this oh poor little me I did x y and z and somebody didn't like it so called me a name.

Moral of this story op - next year go to Waitrose. Honestly you just don't get those horrible ignorant swearing individuals there.

I know I am massively generalising here but I have been going to Waitrose pre Christmas for years and have never seen or heard anything like you described.

Have just watched frozen with the kids.. let it go, let it go!
I clearly live in a very naice area because everyone was super courteous and patient when I took my two preschoolers at lunchtime.

I get the right of way thing.

Tbf, that wasn't what he screamed about.

He said I pulled out right in front of him.

I really didn't. I have quite an ancient bus (Volvo 7 seater). It took me a fair few seconds to make the manoeuvre. I did it while there was no room for him to go down the road because the other car was getting out.

It wasn’t his space. But the way op was parked he may have not known she was waiting for that spot longer then him. I would have given a quick honk when he came along and made eye contact to let him know you were waiting for that spot(pointing to the spot ). So he could move on.

Having seen the diagram, he did have right of way, OP, sorry. But he shouldn't have been abusive, obviously.

This is Tesco not the town high street.

The right or wrong of the parking doesn't excuse what he called you in front of his own child and your children. That's a real worry.

Carried on with what? Clearly he shouldn't have shouted at you like that but you seem to have been the one carrying on confused

Presumably his abusive language.

In a car park, I would agree it was pretty obviously OP's space - she was waiting for it before he even came along, and indicating. I think a car park is different from a normal junction.

And of course he shouldn't have shouted at you like that, whatever you did.

I saw someone in a car park genuinely nick a space - really cheekily. The guy waiting got out and started kicking the car - actually did damage to it. Even tried to smash the window (but couldn't). Loads of people stepped forward to be a witness - because it was just so outrageously disproportionate - it's a parking space ffs.

That was at Christmas as well - talk about goodwill to all men....

He had right of way.

But if you really were so scared then why on earth did you continue speaking at him as you went in?
If I'd heard you going on like that in front of your 3 kids I would have felt sorry for your children and thought they would be putting up with much more at home if you were prepared to act like that in public to a grown man.

Anyway the fact is that whoever was right of way, it’s xmas and time for a bit of peace and love and his language was atrocious! In front of his daughter too. That in itself is unbelievable!

witchend really? You don’t think that someone calling you a fucking slut might make you over react??

I wouldn’t have realised from your position that you were waiting for that space so I would have done the same as him in taking it myself. I would have thought you were indicating to turn left. I think it’s unreasonable to wait in a position where you have to cut across other people to get to the space - either drive around so you’re in the right position or wait for one to open up where you are.

That said, his behaviour was totally unjustified. He could’ve politely complained about you cutting across him but that sort of language and aggression is totally out of order.

Really Witchend ? If I'd been there I'd have thought, "Good for that woman, standing up to that aggressive bullying man".

What sort of man shouts abuse at a woman out with her children? I bet your kids think you are quite amazing standing up to him, even though you were scared.

I think shouting 'fucking slut' at a woman with children in a car park is slightly worse on the scale of wrongness than a woman saying in a wavery voice 'poor poor child' to a grown man.

Please don't think that I used the same language. So sorry if that's what came across when I said I gave what I got.

No, I said 'Happy Christmas too, love.'.

Then he called me a fucking slut.

Then (as shaking and ushering DCs into store), I heard my voice raising, saying, 'Use any more of that language and threatening me and my children,I'm calling the police.'

THEN I said 'Poor, poor child'. About the little girl he was carrying when he'd called me 'a fucking slut.

Then he said 'Yeah, yeah, you're fucking passive agressive aren't you...'

As he walked into the store.

I had to say something. Like I said. Either fight of flight. I chose to fight. My whole body was shaking and I could hear fear in my voice. That doesn't make me a hooligan. I spoke as I felt I had to in the circumstances.