Makeup as gifts

[BadFeminist]

DD is 4.
This year the majority of her Xmas gifts are makeup.

Since starting school DD loves makeup, (and shit American accents and hair flipping) and this is what she has asked for.

She will watch YouTube tutorials on makeup (which I support because it's either that or that god awful Ava Isla and whatever the third one is and I cannot handle their mothers voice without breaking something) and really just wants to play and be "made up" with glittery shit and pink lipstick.

I don't do makeup, I use the same Superdrug eyeliner I've been using for ten years and my one bottle of foundation lasts about two years, so I'm a complete failure as a mother clearly.

Today discussing what the kids are getting in Work one of the wives of a colleague made hell of a face and said "oh god" but when I asked what she meant she just shrugged it off and said "oh nothing, I just think that's not really the done thing" but wouldn't elucidate any further.

Is is THAT big of a deal?

What’s the child’s IQ got to do with her wearing make up?

Yes it’s ok to play pretend but the fact OP has bought her more than just one set of make up isn’t just playing is it? They do make up sets for kids, one set would be plenty for a bit of pretend play? But OPs daughter is mainly getting make up for Christmas and she watches YouTube tutorials (which are not aimed at 4 year olds).

Why not buy her one of those dolls heads? Or some face Paints? Why buy her a load of make up? Shes 4 years old, should be playing with a range of things.

I think the OP is trying to get in line for the "most amazing parent" of the year award
It. Was. Stated. That. All. I. Let.my. Kids. Do. Is. Watch. YouTube. And wear makeup... I explained this is not the case
*
We get it, your child read fluently, has a yearly pass to museum, is interested in astro-physics bladibla.*
I've already said she can't read, and yeah the 8 year old can, he's a neurotypical 8 year old who lives in a house held up by books.
*
You must be such a proud mummy, well done you! We are in awe. Truly we are.*
Jesus, you're proper bitter. Aren't you proud of your kids? Seems a weird thing to diss another parent for.

Awful.

Four years old and her hobby is already wanting to change her face.

Yeah we screwed around with odd bits of toy make-up or mums discarded empties when we were little, but it was like 0.25% of what we were interested in.

And i wish people would stop this utter "its creative expression" fucking BS.

Yeah, it is when you're a professional MUA, or doing something highly technical for fancy dress or stage. Figuring out new ways of making your lips look fuckable, your cheekbones high, your eyes smouldering; is not "creative expression".

And yes, I wear make-up every day.

Call a spade a spade FFS

Why not buy her one of those dolls heads? Or some face Paints? Why buy her a load of make up? Shes 4 years old, should be playing with a range of thing

We do face paints a lot, I'm a trained facepainter. I do all the school events and discos.
She doesn't like the dolls head thing, she had one for Xmas last year, it's been a bookend since January 1st.

You do realise that a lot of make up YouTubers swear and talk about things with adult-related themes don't you? A lot of the content is completely inappropriate.

Do you really want your 4 year old to sit there watching a woman with lip injections contouring her face to all hell and screaming "YAAAAAAS BITCH!" at the top of her voice? "Mainstream" YouTube is NOT for young children - it isn't filtered or regulated in the same way as television.

If it was toy make up I think it wouldn't be an issue, but the fact a 4 y/o sits and watches make up videos on YouTube and is bought Kylie cosmetics products may well be the saddest thing I've read today.

(Hopes to God this is a wind up)

uring out new ways of making your lips look fuckable, your cheekbones high, your eyes smouldering; is not "creative expression".

Um... it's glittery eyeshadow and some pink lipstick...

Gosh is there anything your family can't do..

Oh come on now

Hoping that was a typo and you mean 14 not 4!

@BadFeminist
Thats not what shes watching though, is it?

Or are you trying to tell me there are make-up vloggers out there specialising in applying glittery eyeshadow and pink lipstick?

You do realise that a lot of make up YouTubers swear and talk about things with adult-related themes don't you? A lot of the content is completely inappropriate.

I did already say, but it seems to be a case of selective reading on here, that any YouTube has to go onto the TV, so I'm watching everything they watch, if there is a swear word or anything sexual it goes off. I haven't come across anything explicit yet, she mainly watches the younger teens who are probably filmed by their mums and then the guy with the beard, and I'm yet to hear him swear.

DS isn't allowed to watch DanTDM because of his general language.

I'm pretty relaxed about swearing though, I can't police what other people say around them and they know they aren't allowed to swear and have never shown an inclination to so that's not a giant issue.

I thought you meant she was in Year 4 and even then I thought it seems a bit weird. My daughter is 9 and in Year 4 and she wouldn't even think about trying out make up. Couldn't she be creative with paints and arty stuff instead? But maybe it is a vocational calling that has shown itself very early! She might be destined to be a world famous make up artist one day I guess. I am a bit on the fence about it as to whether it is inappropriate or not. If it makes her happy though I can understand why you are supporting her.

Your colleagues are going to downplay their true emotions for professional reasons.

My neighbour's dd is 4 and her YouTube habits are more age appropriate and nothing like my 14 year old dd's! My neighbour's dd watches videos of gymnastics tricks, karaoke videos so she can learn the lyrics of songs she likes, cute girl's hairstyles (think that's what it's called!). For her putting on Lypsol is like wearing lipstick and she gets her toes and nails painted on special days like birthdays and Xmas. I think that's more what a normal girly 4 year old is like tbh.

At 4, I would have loved it. Long before you tube, I was flipping through my grandma's Avon book and how-to guides from my sister's shelf.

When my eldest was at preschool, I remember some of her friends turning up in make up and glittery Pineapple high heels, while other parents sucked their teeth in disdain. It's what they were into at the time, but it was just a phase and it passed like loom bands and fidget spinners. I saw one of those same girls yesterday, cute as could be, scrambling around with her friends and a dog and no trace of makeup in sight.

*Thats not what shes watching though, is it?

Or are you trying to tell me there are make-up vloggers out there specialising in applying glittery eyeshadow and pink lipstick?*

These are the most recent videos she's watched.

OK. She's your daughter, you know her, you do what feels right.

You asked for our opinions, mine is I don't like it, same as I don't like the obsession with princesses.

One thing is for sure though, she sounds like shes going to be happy with her Christmas presents!

Quite frankly no one should be wearing make up beyond what us absolutely necessary (e.g. To disguise bad pores so you don't look dirty or for confidence if you have very bad self esteem). It's fine for children to occasionally play with their mother's make up (I let my sons wear my lip balm and a bit of blush for fun at home) but you really shouldn't be giving make up to a child. Make up is really unhygienic and absolutely terrible for one's skin. You really shouldn't get her into the habit of wearing it-maybe let her watch YouTube tutorials about skin care instead and gift her sone harmless face masks? On a fundamental the YouTube style make up is also very vain. There is a difference between using make up to look presentable after a bad nights sleep and using make up to drastically alter your appearance. The latter encourages the idea that women don't look good enough unless they are unnaturally made up. perhaps you should take her to some art galleries to look at more natural example of female beauty instead of encouraging an interest in what is essentially bad taste.

At 4, I would have loved it. Long before you tube, I was flipping through my grandma's Avon book and how-to guides from my sister's shelf.

Avon perfume pages for the win!!

When my eldest was at preschool, I remember some of her friends turning up in make up and glittery Pineapple high heels, while other parents sucked their teeth in disdain. It's what they were into at the time, but it was just a phase and it passed like loom bands and fidget spinners. I saw one of those same girls yesterday, cute as could be, scrambling around with her friends and a dog and no trace of makeup in sight.

Heels and makeup outside of the house is still a huge no for me. Heels because the risk they pose to her posture and she's a clumsy sod ha!

We've also had the ear piercing chat which is still a no from me, until she's old enough to be able to care for them herself, and nose/body when she's legally old enough to go to the piercer herself, and tattoos will be discussed again when she's of legal age.
I have tattoos and a septum peircing and her father has tattoos so she is seeing these things as a norm and I would never ever stop her, but I'll be picking out the piercer and tattooist for safety's sake lol.

so I'm watching everything they watch, if there is a swear word or anything sexual it goes off.

OK this is exactly my point. If it goes off after the swearing or whatever else has happened, then they have already seen that content.

So you're not protecting them at all from that content, you're exposing them to it and then turning it off, so that's completely useless.

You asked for our opinions, mine is I don't like it, same as I don't like the obsession with princesses.

Please, don't feel I'm being start, I'm really enjoying this conversation (even the goaders, if that's how they get their kicks then cool)

I hate the obsession with princesses but again, I'm not comfortable telling her she can't watch something.

My mum hated me being horsey as a child, she hated being dragged to lessons and shows and constantly moaned about it and it made me feel shit about having something I excelled in (I have dyscalculia so academically I struggled and such an onus was put on mathematics because the rest of my family excel with numbers) and in the end I gave up until I left school and could look after horses around my job.

I do not want to be that person to dd

*OK this is exactly my point. If it goes off after the swearing or whatever else has happened, then they have already seen that content.

So you're not protecting them at all from that content, you're exposing them to it and then turning it off, so that's completely useless.*

But then surely no access to life in general is safe?
Because at any point she could hear someone swear in a park or cafe or street?

I'd rather she watched something that hasn't yet posed a risk of anything remotely in appropriate than constant episodes of a pig with no manners?

And like I said, it's streamed from the phone in my hand to the bloody great 55 inch tv on the wall. She picks the image, I read the description, she watches it.

It upsets me a bit that girls as young as 4 are watching make up tutorials on YouTube. When I was four I tore around on my bike, I made awful perfume out of brown rose petals, I glued loo rolls to cereal boxes.

Your daughter is watching adults and now wants to emulate them. That content is not produced with her age group in mind. Of course I’m not saying it’s x rated, but I am saying it’s a whole world that she doesn’t need to enter into yet. Id be very cautious about continuing to allow her to watch it.

So the only choices for your 4 y/o DD are YouTube make up videos or Peppa Pig? And because she might hear swearing in the street you wouldn't think to mitigate the risks of hearing it anywhere else?

You yourself said you turn it off if there is inappropriate content. Which they would have already been exposed to.

YouTube video descriptions rarely warn you about inappropriate content before a video starts.

Deary me OP, please just be a troll. This is awful. You made references to goaders before by which I presume you mean people who disagree with you? If you honestly think this is normal that's fine but from an outside perspective it looks like you're projecting your childhood experiences and attempting to be too cool of a parent instead of doing what you're supposed to be doing.