To feel like I have to justify being a SAHM

[Emlou07]

I fully expect this to go down like a lead balloon...

Do any other SAHM/House wives feel like they have to justify themselves when someone asks what you do?

I always feel like I need to say 'I'm a SAHM, but I'm not claiming any benefits. I also don't just sit around all day'

Not that there is anything wrong with being on benefits!

Is this still a dig at me cautionTape? could you please point out where I said working parents don't raise their kids?

This thread is getting ridiculous now and going in circles. I'm annoyed with myself for feeling the need to justify my lifestyle to that poster who has nothing better to do than to write personal attacks about me in the middle of the night.

Spiteful posts speak for themselves. Nobody needs to justify anything fgs - just do what you need to do. There are individuals who hate women and come on here to provoke this nonsense. Excuse my language, but it's all utter bollocks.

g1itterati

I agree, I apologise if people took offense at my comment earlier, it was never meant to insult anyone. Like I said I'm a working mother myself. I was just trying to offer the OP some support :/

Anyway, that's my last post in here.

No I didn't take offence by your posts at all Trinity.

In the country where I was born there is a much greater respect for the role and value of the mother - among men and women. It's something celebrated, rather than sidelined. People here may consider that backward, but it's a different mentality. Women do work of course, but men don't get away quite so much with the expectation on women to "do it all." When you have kids something has to give and it's invariably the woman that takes the hit, so why beat ourselves up over it?

When asked I just say 'I'm not working at the moment.'
I'd like to say I leave it there, but I don't! I blether about going back to work after my first but not the second then add I will be looking for work in a year or so.

Which actually written down indicates I am totally insecure about it! When I really feel very grateful to be able to do this.

I am going to practice the 'I'm not working at the moment' being a whole sentence with no add ons. Stop giving my life story to strangers.

@1wokeup

I do the same! But, a few people have said that to have said I should get in touch when I am looking for work, as they might be able to help with my job search, so maybe it’s not totally a bad thing .

@zzzzz stop twisting what I'm saying!!!

Where on earth have I said or implied that anyone is entitled or lazy?! 🤔🙄

Or that I am disgusted or offended by others choosing a different path to me?

What I AM offended by is the clear tone of implied judgement in your post about "just because you consider wrap around care to be the same as being cared for by a parent at home, doesn't mean others agree"....which, given that about half a dozen posts earlier you'd made the ridiculous comment about children in cupboards, was clearly a judgemental comment.

What ever you have chosen to do - work or not work - then you have to own it. There isn't much point worrying about what others think, what you and your family think is all that matters surely

My husband and I both work because that is what works best for our family in the longterm, I really couldn't give a crap what anyone else thinks. However people who leave work need to understand what they are giving up in terms of pension, personal satisfaction and future career prospects as it is so hard to get a new job after a long break from employment. I find it interesting to see that some women on this thread who don't work think us working women are jealous, I definitely am not as I am not prepared to make those sacrifices. It is a bit petty to accuse others of being jealous.

The elephant in the room here is that the grass often looks a lot greener on both sides than it really is because we’re all so keen to defend what we do that we don’t talk about the reality of it much. Both sides can be hard and make you worry about the future at night.

Very true barbie