To feel slightly offended?

[BeautyQueenFromMars]

I'm not one to take offence easily, as I tend to take things in the spirit in which they are meant, which isn't usually offensively. However, just had a meeting with my new manager (have recently moved depts within same company), and he informed me that the head of the company described me as "a bright girl". I'm 38 ffs!!

Now, I know it's intended as a compliment, the 'big boss' is a lovely Scottish man I get along well with, and I suspect it's a phrase more in his vocab than "intelligent woman", so I'm not going to get all het up about it. But I am a bit affronted, I have to admit. I'm not a ten year old child!

I am struggling a little with my self-worth at the moment, so I could just be over-reacting. Silently, to myself and Mumsnet! Please tell me if IABU...

Likewise, most males my own age (adult) get called 'boy'. Even my partner.

I don't think it's acceptable in the workplace where you don't know that person personally though.

I went out on Thursday night with my friends. And I'm going out tonight-with my friends. It so happens they are all women. Why specify gender?

Bertrand

Why not? Does it matter? It comes out naturally. As long as my female friends aren't offended by 'girls' then it's not an issue tbh. That's personal preference. Far different in a workplace.

It would annoy me to be called 'girl' by someone I don't know well, it's patronising and sexist IMHO.

Just read the thread and it’s actually so depressing how many women are perfectly happy to be called ‘girl’ and ‘bright girl’ and don’t see that no boss would really say ‘bright boy’, ‘lad’ is not he equivalent and yes it does matter.

I live in a lad/lass area but there is no way on earth a GP or MP would be described as a girl or boy/lad or lass. Actually, maybe some people would call one ‘girl’, sadly.

What I find depressing in these threads is that they make a mockery of feminism and real problems and we lose all credibility when coming up with that nonsense.

that no boss would really say ‘bright boy’ you make it sound like a boss is male. Why do you think that is?

"that no boss would really say ‘bright boy’ you make it sound like a boss is male. Why do you think that is?"

Really? What makes you think that?

Incidentally, I think you have finally ticked the last "box" on my list. Thank you!

you are very welcome BertrandRussell

that no boss would really say ‘bright boy’ you make it sound like a boss is male. Why do you think that is

How do you get that bosses must be male, from that sentence?

that no boss would really say ‘bright boy’ you make it sound like a boss is male. Why do you think that is

No I get that.

You'd be pretty darn lucky if that's the most annoying thing your boss ever says to you.

I wouldn't be impressed to be called a bright girl and if my boss said it about me i'd think she had gone insane.
Intelligent woman _ yes that's totally fine.
Girls are children. Bright is a term used for children.
If anyone ever called me a good girl I'd make sure they never did it again.