To want his birthday not to be connected with Christmas?

[MrsBonato]

My dc is 4 on Monday. The very beginning of December. He was due on Christmas Eve and thankfully came early. I thought we wouldn't have Christmas things around his birthday.
Last year my bil and sil sent his birthday gifts wrapped in Christmas paper. I was ok with it and didn't make any comment until ds went to open them and said 'these are Christmas presents'. DH then had a bit of a moan to mil who I presume said to bil about it as we got a apology via text a little while after.

This year he has received a gift from a friend of the family, I had a sneak look at what it was, she clearly said it was for his birthday. It is a snowman Christmas ornament with chocolate coins and an advent calendar. My ds will again say that these are Christmas things.

I wouldn't be surprised if bil and sil repeat what they did last year either.

Am I being ungrateful? Is my dc being ungrateful in thinking he hasn't actually been given birthday gifts but just Christmas gifts?

And anyone else with a child who has a birthday even closer to Christmas, how do you deal with it?

But if they want a games consule surely it is better that as a joint present than separate less desirable presents? My ds' will be sharing a ps4 as their Christmas present this year.

My birthday is Monday too and it has never been linked with Christmas (not once in almost 55 years!). Surely the simplest thing would have been to tell your child that paper is just paper and if he is receiving the gift on his birthday ten obviously it is a birthday gift. An advent calendar is odd though. He does sound rather ungrateful.

I think the bigger problems with a December birthday come later as nobody can afford to come out fo ryour birthday and all restaurants are obsessed with bloody brussels spouts and fully booked for xmas parties.

No December dcs in our family but my DDad is a December birthday and I was really ill last year and had bought his present early but had no adult Birthday paper but loads of Christmas paper. He was really amused (thankfully!?) to receive a bottle of Bush and whatever else we got him in pink Trolls Birthday paper from DDs last class Birthday party but did say he was pleased it wasn’t Christmasy.

It’s lazy and thoughtless.

I think your ds just wants to feel extra special on his birthday. Just let him feel that he is loved and that his birthday being just close to Christmas is something to be more happy about and not something to be sad about.

I'm due soon with my second and this has just confirmed my worry about having a Christmas baby. My first is a summer baby he obviously get very definite birthday presents although they may be slightly summer related things like paddling pool, shorts, summery garden toys seasonal gifts are hard to avoid but Christmas is just that.

Il be making an effort to always celebrate baby 2s birthday in a this is your day regardless. If they are born on Christmas Day il celebrate either the day before or the day after either their birthday or Christmas depending on what they decide they would prefer.

It's going to suck for them regardless should have done the calculations before ttc lol.

My son's birthday is actually on Christmas day and he hasn't received any birthday presents in Christmas wrapping paper. Both my husbands family and mine seem to be quite considerate in that fact. I try and make sure his birthday is seen as a completely different occasion. I think I would be upset if someone saw them as the same thing. Why should you be treated any different because of when your birthday is?

@Mustang27 I'm 35 weeks. If it makes you feel better, my first was Christmas day. My planning is pretty rubbish.

People don't think. If your birthday is not around Christmas time, you don't see the problem of getting a combined Christmas/birthday present or presents wrapped up in festive paper. It's wrapping innit, so stop being so ungrateful, that's what they think.

Well as someone born just after Xmas, I've had the combined gifts and presents in Christmas paper. One of my friends used to be a bogger for the combined gift (which never compensated for 2 pressies) so one year I gave her one back - her birthday was in May and I said this is a combined birthday/xmas gift. Her face was priceless but she'd never gave it a second though before.

I've also used Christmas paper to wrap my sister's birthday present in as she always did the same to me - her birthday is June.

We laugh about it now. You get used to it.

In our family we have birthdays on 23 Dec, 26 Dec (x2), 28 Dec, 2 Jan (x2), 3 Jan and 4 Jan.

Christmas wrapping paper is often used for both and that is never a problem, no one is upset over that. For young children there have been two presents, for older children/young adults we go for one present and one gift of money (they love the sales) and for older adults there are again two presents unless it is something more expensive in which case it is a joint Christmas and birthday. An older adult is fine with a joint present if it is a really good one.

We all stick to this and everyone is happy.

My mum has her birthday in mid January, she used to get joint presents quite often as a child. As an adult people either have no money or gave her shite that they didn’t want for Christmas.

As I’ve said in my previous posts, we have been lucky everyone has always bought my dd two presents or have given her money so she can use it later in the year.

My dd absolutely loves having a Christmas birthday, maybe she won’t as she gets older.

Also, my birthday was a few days ago and I'm chuffed with my Lindt advent calendar

My birthday is near Christmas and I've often had presents wrapped in Christmas paper. If someone complained about what I had wrapped a present in then I probably wouldn't bother buying for them again.

Mine is just after Christmas though and one of my pet hates is clearly regifted presents or something bought in the sale, but more not being spent.

Haha

Least they are kind of in the same situation edge. It's just extra fun times for you trying to sort it all out at once .

@TheEdgeOfGlory266 I should ask how do you celebrate your first birthday separately to Christmas Day?

only skim read but we have two aunts and uncles who literally buy ZERO for my dd, they have no dc of their own - no other nieces or nephews to buy for and no large family on dh side or mine to buy for and they are loaded, ie can spend over 5 grand on latest cameras, own several properties each, work in very high paid jobs, so yes I think whilst ideally it would be nice to separate the bday from xmas, you can do that yourselves as many other people will - I think you should thankful they have taken an interest and buy for your son at all.

@Mustang27 he's still young so we haven't really had a parties with friends yet but we do have a get together with friends and family on a date that suits people just to celebrate but we celebrate is birthday properly on his birthday. I make sure I say happy birthday to him before I said merry Christmas. I guess it sounds silly but I like to make his birthday seem more important. We open birthday presents and then Christmas presents. He's too young to really understand that it's different but I hope he doesn't hate it when he's older. I love it, but I'm hoping I avoid Christmas day this time!

I have a December birthday and I would hate it. I have family/friends with birthdays closer to Christmas and wouldn’t wrap a birthday present in Christmas paper. You wouldn’t do it for someone who has a January birthday!

Gumbo - I’m a twin and when growing up people have bought us a joint present at times. We are 2 people!

I don't know why you're bothered tbh. My birthday is 13th Dec and I have basically always seen Christmas and my bday as being one big celebration. I bloody love Christmas coz of lovely pressies and parties! Some are Christmas some are birthday, they're all good.

The thing is that if your birthday is December or early January and you have thoughtless family/friends then this is your experience every year. This is made extremely galling if other family members have their birthday celebrated properly just because it is at a more convenient time of year to the giver.

Yup my kids are both born within 10 days of Christmas and in your shoes I would be cross if people treated them like that! Everyone else gets their special day in the year, why shouldn't people born in December.

Christmas paper is cheap, it doesnt really matter what the present is wrapped in does it?

Well, yeah it kind of does if it's Christmas wrapping paper for a birthday present, as it's not a Christmas present, is it?!
I have no Christmas birthday, two kids with none either, and also know no-one with a Christmas birthday. Even I know that if someone had a birthday in December they might actually like a birthday present as well as a Christmas one! You know, like everyone else gets instead of just lumping them all together as Christmas.
It's not like the card shops etc suddenly stop selling birthday wrapping paper in the run up to Christmas so it's no hardship to differentiate!

PumpkinSquash that's it exactly. Not bothering to get birthday wrapping/card/present when other children with more 'convenient' birthdays do get these things sends a clear message to the child that they arent worth the bother.

Ds' birthday is 23/12. Occasionally people have used Christmas paper and tbh it makes me a bit but ds doesn't care and he's almost 11. I'd have just replied 'oh it's definitely a birthday present they've just been a bit silly using Xmas paper but never mind' or 'aren't you lucky you've a birthday in December so you can get extra xmassy things to use all month!' . It really doesn't need to be a problem.

Ds is now finding it quite handy tbh as he can get joint presents which are bigger . Incidentally dh also has his birthday at Christmas - he's never been bothered by any of this either.