To be raging with 'd'p?

[Naturebabe]

Basically, I did a big wash of all school uniform for ds for the coming week. I like to have it all clean and hung up for him in advance, so he knows where to find it. I work away quite a bit in the week, so it usually gets done on a weekend (dp doesn't bother doing any washing except his own stuff - where he's proud of how little he has to wash in terms of his own clothes).

As the weather was shite today, no chance of drying it outside. He hung it up indoors on a pulley thing (it would take a week to dry there), so I pulled it down and chucked it in the dryer. When I was out of the room, he got it all ot, chucked the load on the side, and PULLED THE FUSE OUT OF THE PLUG FOR THE DRYER! He has still not replaced it.

Am IBU to be a ball of rage about this?

He has form for being a tight arse.

I am extremely concerned about how he behaves toward your children when you are not around.

yes I told him earlier unless he put it back, I was going to take little components out of his possessions and see how he liked it! He said 'that would just be malicious'. I was .

I thought he was going to be an 'ex' some months ago.

What happened? He's clearly not improved.

What an absolute arsehole!

Does he think you’re a child? It reminds me of confiscating a toy because you moved his toys or something.....

I couldn’t live with someone like that.

Thanks mumsnet - just got fuse from kettle - tumble dryer happily chuntling away again

Has he gone out?

Otherwise, wouldn’t you have to sit and guard the dryer whilst it’s on?

(a question I never thought I’d have to ask!)

I'm sorry but this is not normal. Why are you accepting this behaviour. You are worth so much more.

Don't know the backstory, but this is obviously unaccceptable. He'd make his own child wear damp school uniform in winter to punish you?

This man is abusive. Get rid. There are no other options, no magicbutton to make him behave like a decent partner/parent. If the current home is in his name, work out how to find a new home for yourself and DC, if it's in your name, work out how to throw him out permanently.

There is absolutely NOTHING you can do to make him see you and DC as people. Don't waste any more tiime trying.

In fact, take the fuses out of everything in the house and arrange them on the work surfaces to spell out "I WANT A DIVORCE".

Has he gone out?

Otherwise, wouldn’t you have to sit and guard the dryer whilst it’s on?

(a question I never thought I’d have to ask!)

That's what I was wondering, and thinking, as well!

He sounds like a dick. Wtaf?

He's upstairs watching a film.... I'm guarding the dryrer [hmmm] and mumsnetting.... It's not normal is it? I've kind of lost track of what 'normal' is tbh, but clearly this isn't.

Life is too short for putting up with this shit.

Indeed it is Taco.... I'm 40, not 4...

What the fu*k - who goes to that extent of sadness to hide a fuse from the plug just to not use a tumble dryer I would also be absolutely livid of

This is absolutely not normal and seriously sounds like red flag territory for abuse. Do get some RL help! What a knob!

Yes. Life is much too short to spend with someone like this. And what will it teach your son?

Just realised I'll have to put the fuse back in the kettle to make my hot water bottle.....

Use a pan on the hob.

How old is your DS, and when can you move him to your new place and get rid of this leech?

This is HORRIBLE. I feel quite sick for you OP and as a pp said, worry about his attitude to your DS when you're not there.

Don't let your DH raise another like him.

great I can't get the plug back on the kettle

This is exactly the kind of stunt stbxh would pull. Exactly.

Fucking hell. You need to get away from this man.

A normal man would be happy for you to have the dryer on. Hell, my BIL sold his much loved xbox to buy a new dryer when the one they had stopped working.

What you're living with is in no way normal.

I am so mad reading this. He's a bullying pig. Don't know about your previous post but this on its own is bad !!! Speaks volumes that there's more going on than this.

I would be able to let this go. First time I'd get him alone with no kids about ...... He wouldn't know what hit him.

Stop flapping about with fuses and deal with the main problem. You are married to an abusive, controlling man as has been made clear to you on your other threads.
When are you going to see the light?