AIBU to think my friend is taking the piss?

[Linning]

Was supposed to meet with friend this evening to help her out with a project and catch up. We were supposed to meet up at around 6pm when she was due out of work but at 6pm she sent me a text saying "Just got off work, I am heading to the gym now, will be done at around 9pm, let's meet then! x" . Didn't say anything, figured I could use the time to do stuff around the house and do a bit of work. Come 9 pm and she sends me another text saying that she "just finished her gym session and was now going to get a shower and go home" so I simply told her to text me when she was home and ready and I would come over (she lives close by), about an hour later I received another text from her saying that she had "just bumped into a friend who has just moved in the area and she was off to check out her new appartment but she would text me when she left her friend's flat so we could meet." It is now 11pm (!) where I am living and I am sat at home supposedly waiting for a text from her to tell me she is now finally ready to meet me.

So am I unreasonable to think she is taking the utter piss? She has a form for this too. She once asked to meet up with her at a certain time, then texted me when I was ready to tell me that she would need an extra hour to clean up her place and have a quick shower, when I got there an hour later, she had "fallen asleep" so I had to wait an extra 30 minutes in her living room while she showered and got ready, we then spent an hour together (where I got dragged along to buy furniture for her place) before she casually told me that she had a skype session scheduled with her therapist in about 15 minutes and did I think we could meet up again when she was done an hour later.

So is that me or this friend absolutely doesn't value me or my time at all? I have no problem being flexible and rescheduling but I have feeling she has taken it to the next level now and I am especially angry as I have refused other plans for the night so I could be available for her and her project and have now been left feeling like a proper mug.

'She has been texting to ask if we could talk but I simply reiterated that I needed time and would appreciate it if she stopped texting for a while. I think it would benefit her if we could meet in person as she probably know that I have a hard time being as assertive in person as I am right now through texts so I am trying to keep her at bay. I also have to remind myself that she has yet to apologize to me'

Yep, she has the measure of you. She won't apologise to you because in her view, she's always the wronged party. You have every right to cut her a wide berth and not continue the 'friendship' because there isn't one.

Well done OP - that message was epic. I would kick her into touch. Sending you audios of her crying is just weird.

' Hoping you will respect that and won't try to reach out before I am ready. "

See, she's still showing you it's all about her. No respect for your feelings at all.

If you do talk to her in person - and I wouldn't if I were you, I'd just let the friendship, such as it was, die a natural death, you've said what needed to be said in your text - then rehearse and learn by rote what you want to say to her and don't be diverted from it.

As expat has pointed out she is already ignoring the boundaries you have tried to set by contacting you, there is no way I can see that you will be able to introduce, much less enforce, any boundaries in this relationship, just let it wither on the vine. Move on and don't look back.

Well done lining, it’s nice to see you asserting yourself. It’s a good feeling and you should remember it next time some cf tries to take advantage of your good nature. Don’t let the guilt creep in.

I've been in your exact position OP, she forced me to be unkind in the end, but a friendship has to be a two way thing, not one always giving and the other always taking.

Strange how the giver feels bad, but the taker never does.

Definitely keep it by text - I'm equally unassertive in person!